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  • What if I’m Being Bullied at School?

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  • What if I’m Being Bullied at School?
  • Answers to 10 Questions Young People Ask
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Answers to 10 Questions Young People Ask
ypq question 5 pp. 15-17
One boy is bullied by another in front of his schoolmates

QUESTION 5

What if I’m Being Bullied at School?

WHY IT MATTERS

How you respond can make things better​—or worse.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO?

Imagine this scenario: Thomas doesn’t want to go to school today. Or tomorrow. Or ever again. It all started three months ago when his schoolmates spread vicious rumors about him. Then came the nicknames. Sometimes someone will knock Thomas’ textbooks out of his hands and act as if it were an accident, or one person in a group behind him will shove him, and by the time Thomas turns around, he can’t tell who did it. Yesterday, the bullying took an even more sinister turn when Thomas received an online threat . . .

If you were Thomas, how would you respond?

STOP AND THINK!

You are not totally powerless! In fact, you can fight a bully without using your fists. How?

  • DON’T REACT. The Bible says: “A stupid person gives vent to all his feelings, but the wise one calmly keeps them in check.” (Proverbs 29:11) If you remain as calm as possible​—at least on the outside—​those bullying you may well lose interest.

  • DON’T RETALIATE. The Bible says: “Return evil for evil to no one.” (Romans 12:17) Seeking revenge will only make the situation worse.

  • DON’T WALK INTO TROUBLE. The Bible says: “The shrewd one sees the danger and conceals himself.” (Proverbs 22:3) To the extent possible, avoid people who could cause trouble, and avoid situations where bullying may occur.

  • TRY AN UNEXPECTED RESPONSE. The Bible says: “A mild answer turns away rage.” (Proverbs 15:1) You can even try humor. For example, if a bully asserts that you’re overweight, you could shrug your shoulders and say, “I guess I could lose a few pounds!”

  • WALK AWAY. “Silence shows that you are mature and that you are stronger than the person harassing you,” says 19-year-old Nora. “It demonstrates self-control​—something the bully doesn’t have.”​—2 Timothy 2:24.

  • WORK ON YOUR SELF-CONFIDENCE. Bullies can often detect those who think negatively of themselves and who are thus not likely to fight back. In contrast, many bullies will back off if they see that you aren’t giving them any power over you.

  • TELL SOMEONE. A former schoolteacher says: “I would urge anyone who is being bullied to speak up. It’s the right thing to do, and it can prevent someone else from being bullied.”

A young man faces a bully with self-confidence

Self-confidence will give you a power that the bully does not possess

DID YOU KNOW?

Besides physical assaults, bullying can also include:

  • Words like fire come out of a bully’s mouth

    Verbal attacks. “I’ll never forget the names they called me or the things they said. They made me feel worthless, unwanted, and good-for-nothing. I’d rather have been given a black eye.”​—Celine, 20.

  • A young man sits alone after being avoided by his peers

    Social isolation. “My schoolmates started to avoid me. They would make it seem that there was no room at the lunch table, so I couldn’t sit with them. For the whole year, I cried and ate alone.”​—Haley, 18.

  • A young woman backs away from a computer screen after being a victim of cyberbullying

    Cyberbullying. “With just a few keystrokes on a computer, you can ruin someone’s reputation​—or even his life. It sounds like an overstatement, but it can happen!”​—Daniel, 14.

BULLYING QUIZ

TRUE OR FALSE

ANSWERS

1 Bullying has been around for thousands of years.

1 True. For example, the Bible tells of the Nephilim​—a group whose name means “Those Who Cause Others to Fall Down.”​—Genesis 6:4.

2 Bullying is just harmless teasing. It’s not that serious.

2 False. Bullying is a contributing factor in a large number of youth suicides.

3 The best way to stop a bully is to fight back.

3 False. Bullies are often physically stronger than their victims, so attempts at retaliation are futile.

4 If you witness bullying, it’s best to ignore it.

4 False. In this case, there’s no such thing as an innocent bystander. If you see bullying and don’t say anything, you may become part of the problem rather than part of the solution.

5 Beneath the boastful talk, bullies are often insecure.

5 True. Although some bullies have a big ego, many are insecure and put others down to make themselves feel better.

6 Bullies can change.

6 True. With help, bullies can change the way they think and act.

ACTION PLAN
  • If I am confronted by a bully, what will I do or say?

DISCOVER MORE!
Beat a Bully Without Using Your Fists

Watch the whiteboard animation Beat a Bully Without Using Your Fists at www.jw.org. (Look under BIBLE TEACHINGS > TEENAGERS)

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