Reisi To Lavi Maryaz
“Ki sakenn kontan so fam kouma li kontan limem, e fam la bizin respekte so mari.”—EFEZIEN 5:33.
1. Mem si o-koumansman bann koup ki fek marye bien zwaye, ki kitsoz zot kapav atann pou gagne dan zot lavi maryaz? (Get zimaz dan koumansman lartik.)
KAN lemarye ek lamarye trouv zot kamarad zour zot maryaz, zot extra kontan. Kan zot ti pe frekante, zot lamour ti vinn telman for ki zot ti anvi marye ek lerla zot finn promet pou res fidel anver zot kamarad. Apre zot maryaz, amezir ki zot koumans zot lavi ansam, zot pou bizin fer bann sanzman pou ki zot kapav res ini. Zeova, Limem ki finn kree maryaz, ek Li anvi ki sak koup viv ere ek reisi zot lavi maryaz. Akoz sa, Li finn donn bann bon konsey dan so Parol, Labib. (Proverb 18:22) Me kanmem sa, Labib dir nou ki bann dimounn inparfe ki marye pou gagn bann problem, ouswa bann “difikilte.” (1 Korintien 7:28) Kouma bann koup kapav diminie zot bann problem? Kouma bann Kretien kapav fer zot maryaz reisi?
2. Ki kalite lamour bann konzwin bizin montre anver zot kamarad?
2 Labib ansegn nou ki lamour li enn kalite bien inportan. Me, ena diferan kalite lamour ki enn koup bizin manifeste dan zot lavi maryaz. Par exanp, zot bizin montre lafeksion anver zot kamarad, ek osi montre ki zot amoure. Si zot ena zanfan, li vinn ankor pli inportan pou montre lamour dan lafami. Me se lamour ki baze lor bann prinsip ki fer enn maryaz vremem reisi. Lapot Pol ti dekrir sa kalite lamour-la kan li ti dir: “Ki sakenn kontan so fam kouma li kontan limem, e fam la bizin respekte so mari.”—Efezien 5:33.
RESPONSABILITE BANN KONZWIN
3. Ziska ki pwin bann koup bizin kontan zot kamarad?
3 Pol ti ekrir: “Mari, kontign kontan zot fam, parey kouma Kris osi finn kontan kongregasion ek finn donn so lavi pou sov li.” (Efezien 5:25, NW.) Bann Kretien azordi imit lexanp Zezi kan zot kontan sakenn zot kamarad parey kouma Zezi finn kontan so bann disip. (Lir Zan 13:34, 35; 15:12, 13.) Bann mari ek bann fam Kretien bizin telman kontan zot kamarad ki zot mem dispoze mor pou zot kamarad. Me kan ena bann problem grav dan zot maryaz, sertin kapav panse ki zot lamour pa ase for. Ki kitsoz kapav ed zot? Se lamour ki baze lor bann prinsip. Sa lamour-la “[siport tou, NW], toultan pe fer konfians, toultan ena lesperans, toultan persevere.” Sa kalite lamour-la “li eternel.” (1 Korintien 13:7, 8) Bann koup bizin rapel ki zot finn fer enn ve, setadir enn promes sakre. Zot finn promet pou kontan zot kamarad ek pou res fidel anver zot kamarad. Kan zot rapel sa, bann koup Kretien pou bien deside pou rod led Zeova ek pou travay ansam pou regle ninport ki problem.
4, 5. (a) Ki responsabilite enn mari ena antan ki sef fami? (b) Kouma enn madam bizin konsider lotorite ki Bondie finn etabli? (c) Ki bann sanzman enn koup finn bizin fer?
4 Pol ti explik responsabilite sak konzwin kan li ti dir: “Fode ki bann fam soumet ar zot mari parey kouma zot soumet ar Lesegner, parski enn mari li sef so fam parey kouma Kris osi li sef kongregasion.” (Efezien 5:22, 23, NW.) Sa pa vedir ki enn mari meyer ki so fam. Zeova ti koz lor rol inportan ki bann fam marye ena kan Li ti dir: “Li pa bon ki zom res tousel. Mo pou fer enn led pou li, enn kikenn ki al bien ar li.” (Zenez 2:18) Enn fam bizin ed so mari pou vinn enn bon sef fami. Ek enn mari bizin imit lamour ki Zezi ti ena antan ki “sef kongregasion.” Kan enn mari fer sa, so fam pou santi li an sekirite ek li pou pli fasil pou li respekte ek soutenir so mari.
“Kan nou’nn fer bann kitsoz kouma Zeova anvi, nou finn vinn pli pros”
5 Cathy, ki’nn marye avek Fred, rekonet: “Kan mo ti enn ser selibater, mo ti indepandan ek mo ti debrouy mwa par momem. Me kan mo’nn marye, mo finn bizin sanze parski mo’nn bizin aprann pou kont lor mo mari. Li pa ti touzour fasil, me kan nou’nn fer bann kitsoz kouma Zeova anvi, nou finn vinn pli pros.”[1] (Get not alafin lartik.) Fred dir: “Pou mwa, pran bann desizion zame ti enn kitsoz fasil. Asterla, pou pran an konsiderasion lopinion de dimounn, li ankor pli konplike. Me kan mo priye pou rod direksion Zeova ek kan mo pran kont vremem seki mo madam panse, sa vinn deplizanpli fasil pou mwa. Mo santi ki nou enn vre lekip!”
6. Kan ena bann problem dan maryaz, kouma lamour li ‘enn kitsoz parfe ki soud enn koup ansam’?
6 Enn maryaz kapav vinn bien solid si enn koup “kontign siport sakenn zot kamarad, ek pardonn sakenn zot kamarad avek tou zot leker.” Dan enn koup, toule-de inparfe. Akoz sa, toule-de fer erer. Me kan sa arive, zot kapav aprann ar zot bann erer, aprann pardone ek montre lamour ki baze lor bann prinsip Labib. Sa lamour-la li “enn kitsoz parfe ki soud [enn koup] ansam.” (Kolosien 3:13, 14, NW.) Bann konzwin kapav montre enn lamour koumsa kan zot ena pasians ek bonte ek kan zot pa “gard enn kont pou tou ditor ki’nn fer [zot].” (1 Korintien 13:4, 5, NW.) Kan ena bann dezakor, bann konzwin bizin esey regle sa pli vit posib; sa zour-la mem. (Efezien 4:26, 27) Bizin limilite ek kouraz pou dir: “Pardonn mwa si mo’nn bles twa.” Me kan bann konzwin fer sa, sa pou ed zot pou regle bann problem ek zot pou vinn pli pros.
BIZIN MONTRE LAFEKSION
7, 8. (a) Ki konsey Labib done konsernan bann relasion sexiel dan maryaz? (b) Kifer bann konzwin bizin montre lafeksion anver zot kamarad?
7 Labib donn bann bon konsey ki kapav ed bann koup pou ena enn bon fason panse lor sexialite. (Lir 1 Korintien 7:3-5, NW.) Li bien inportan ki enn mari ek so fam pran kont santiman ek bezwin sakenn zot kamarad. Si enn mari pa montre lafeksion, so fam kapav trouv sa difisil pou apresie zot bann relasion sexiel. Bann mari bizin tret zot fam avek “konsiderasion.” (1 Pier 3:7) Fode zame ki enn kikenn inpoz ouswa fors so konzwin pou gagn relasion sexiel ar li. Okontrer, sa bizin vinn dan enn fason natirel. An zeneral, dan sa domenn-la, bann zom reazir pli vit ki bann fam. Me fode ki toule-de dan sa ler-la, zot resanti sa bezwin-la.
8 Labib pa donn bann linstriksion presi lor fason pou montre lafeksion pandan bann relasion sexiel ouswa lor bann limit ki mari ek fam bizin fixe kan zot gagn bann relasion sexiel. Me Labib koz lor sa kalite lafeksion-la. (Kantik Salomon 1:2; 2:6) Li kler ki bann koup Kretien bizin montre lafeksion anver zot konzwin.
9. Kifer li pa bon ki nou ena bann dezir sexiel pou enn dimounn ki pa nou konzwin?
9 Kan nou ena enn gran lamour pou Bondie ek pou nou prosin, nou pa pou permet nanye ni personn menas nou maryaz. Sertin finn fer zot maryaz vinn frazil ouswa mem detrir zot maryaz kan zot inn vinn esklav pornografi. Nou bizin reziste ninport ki tantasion pou get pornografi ouswa pou ena bann dezir sexiel pou lezot dimounn ouswa lezot kitsoz ki andeor nou maryaz. Nou bizin mem rezet ninport ki latitid ki pou donn linpresion ki nou interese ar enn dimounn ki pa nou konzwin. Parski si nou azir koumsa, nou pou montre ki nou pena lamour pou nou konzwin. Nou bizin rapel ki Bondie konn tou nou bann panse ek nou bann aksion. Kan nou rapel sa, nou pou plis anvi fer Li plezir ek res fidel anver nou konzwin.—Lir Matie 5:27, 28; Ebre 4:13.
KAN ENA PROBLEM DAN MARYAZ
10, 11. (a) Ki kantite dimounn divorse azordi? (b) Ki Labib dir lor separasion? (c) Ki pou ed enn konzwin pou pa separe tro vit?
10 Kan bann koup pa reisi regle zot bann problem grav, zot kapav desid pou separe ouswa pou divorse. Dan sertin pei, plis ki lamwatie bann koup divorse. Biensir, sa pa ariv souvan parmi bann Temwin Zeova. Me kanmem sa, pli ale, pli boukou Kretien pe gagn bann problem grav dan zot maryaz.
11 Labib donn sa bann linstriksion-la: “Enn fam bizin pa kit so mari. Me si li kit so mari li bizin res san marye, sinon li bizin rekonsilie ar so mari. Ek enn mari bizin pa kit so fam.” (1 Korintien 7:10, 11) Sertin koup kapav panse ki zot bann problem telman grav ki zot bizin separe. Me Zezi ti montre ki kantite li grav kan separe. Li ti repet seki Bondie ti dir o-koumansman konsernan maryaz ek apre li ti dir: “Fode pa dimoun separ seki Bondie finn met ansam.” (Matie 19:3-6; Zenez 2:24) Alor, Zeova anvi ki mari-fam res ansam. (1 Korintien 7:39) Nou tou nou bizin rapel ki nou ena pou rann kont Zeova pou nou bann aksion. Sa kapav ed nou pou regle bann problem pli vit posib avan ki zot vinn pli grav.
Bann koup Kretien reisi trouv bann solision pou zot bann problem parski zot les Bondie gid zot
12. Ki kapav pous enn kikenn pou separe?
12 Kifer sertin koup konn bann problem bien grav? Pou sertin, zot maryaz finn desevwar zot ek zot ankoler parski zot maryaz pa pe pas kouma zot ti anvi. Bien souvan, ena bann problem parski bann dimounn finn elve dan diferan fason, ek zot pa reazir parey parski zot pena mem santiman. Bann difikilte avek belmer-boper, kouma pou depans kas ouswa kouma pou elve bann zanfan, tou sa bann kitsoz-la osi kapav kree bann problem. Me, li bon nou kone ki boukou koup Kretien reisi trouv bann solision pou zot bann problem parski zot les Bondie gid zot.
13. Ki bann rezon valab ena pou ki enn koup separe?
13 Me ena bann rezon valab kot enn koup kapav separe. Par exanp: Kan enn mari refiz pou donn so fami seki li bizin pou viv, kan ena bann violans fizik bien grav, ek kan li kler ki spiritialite enn konzwin an danze. Dan sa bann sitiasion-la sertin Kretien finn desid pou separe. Kan ena bann problem grav, bann koup bizin al rod led ar bann ansien. Sa bann zom-la ena boukou lexperyans ek zot kapav ed bann koup pou aplik bann konsey Biblik dan zot lavi. Ek kan bann konzwin demann Zeova so lespri sin, sa kapav ed zot pou met an pratik bann prinsip Biblik ek pou manifeste bann kalite Kretien. (Galat 5:22, 23)[2]—Get not alafin lartik.
14. Ki Labib dir bann Kretien ki zot konzwin pa Temwin?
14 Labib montre ki ena bann bon rezon pou ki enn koup res ansam mem si enn konzwin ladan pa servi Zeova. (Lir 1 Korintien 7:12-14, NW.) Konzwin ki pa Temwin la, li “sanktifie” parski li finn marye avek enn serviter Bondie. Zot bann zanfan osi “sin” ek zot ena proteksion Bondie. Pol ti ankouraz bann koup Kretien par sa bann parol-la: “Ki kone? Apre tou, twa fam krwayan to kapav sov to mari. E twa mari krwayan to kapav sov to fam.” (1 Korintien 7:16) Boukou mari ek fam Kretien finn les enn bon lexanp kan zot finn ed zot konzwin pou vinn bann serviter Zeova.
15, 16. (a) Ki konsey Labib donn bann fam Kretien ki zot mari pa Temwin? (b) Ki enn Kretien bizin fer si so konzwin ‘ki pa krwayan desid pou ale’?
15 Lapot Pier ti konsey bann fam Kretien pou soumet ar zot mari, “pou ki si ena ki pa oule ekout laparol, kapav gagn zot san parol gras-a kondwit zot fam, parski zot finn trouve ar zot prop lizie kouma zot fam ena enn kondwit pir ek enn gran respe.” Olie ki touletan li koz lor so bann krwayans, enn fam pou pli kapav ed so mari pou aksepte laverite kan li manifeste “enn karakter trankil ek dous, . . . ki ena enn gran valer devan lizie Bondie.”—1 Pier 3:1-4, NW.
16 Ki enn Kretien kapav fer si so konzwin ki pa Temwin desid pou separe? Labib dir: “Me si sa kikenn ki pa krwayan la desid pou ale, les li ale; dan sa sitiasion-la, enn frer ouswa enn ser nepli ena okenn lien ar so konzwin, me Bondie demann zot pou res anpe.” (1 Korintien 7:15, NW.) Mem si separasion-la kapav amenn enn sertin lape, dapre Labib konzwin Temwin la pa lib pou remarye. Me li pa oblize fors so konzwin pou reste. Avek letan, kitfwa konzwin ki pa Temwin la kapav desid pou retourne, pou sov zot maryaz. Ek plitar, li kapav mem vinn enn serviter Zeova.
KI KITSOZ PLI INPORTAN DAN ENN MARYAZ?
17. Ki kitsoz bizin pli inportan pou bann koup Kretien?
17 Parski nou pe viv lafin “bann dernie zour,” nou pe konn enn “lepok kritik, difisil pou siporte.” (2 Timote 3:1-5, NW.) Se akoz sa ki nou bizin ena enn relasion solid avek Zeova pou protez nou. Lapot Pol ti ekrir: “Letan ki reste bien tigit. Depi aster bann zom marye bizin viv kouma dir zot pena fam; . . . bann ki servi seki ena dan sa lemonn la, komsi zot pa gagn profi ladan.” (1 Korintien 7:29-31) Pol pa ti pe rod dir ki bann koup bizin negliz zot konzwin. Me nou bizin donn priorite nou ladorasion pou Zeova parski nou pe viv dan bann dernie zour.—Matie 6:33.
18. Kouma bann Kretien kapav ere ek reisi zot lavi maryaz?
18 Dan sa lepok difisil ki nou pe viv la, nou trouv boukou maryaz pe kase. Eski li posib ki nou ere ek reisi nou lavi maryaz? Wi li posib. Si nou res pros ar Zeova ek so pep, si nou met an pratik bann prinsip Biblik, ek si nou aksepte ki lespri sin gid nou. Kan nou fer sa, nou montre respe pou “seki Bondie finn met ansam.”—Mark 10:9.
^ [1] (paragraf 5) Sertin nom finn sanze.
^ [2] (paragraf 13) Get liv “Reste dan L’amour Bondié,” dan anex, “Seki la Bible Dire lor Divorce ek Separation.”