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“The Last Enemy” Will Be Defeated!The Watchtower—1993 | November 15
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Coping With the Death of a Loved One
Death is especially an enemy when it strikes a loved one. “It will be worse for you,” said a terminally ill wife to her husband as she contemplated death. Why could she say that? Because the Bible says: “All that your hand finds to do, do with your very power, for there is no work nor devising nor knowledge nor wisdom in Sheol [the common grave of mankind], the place to which you are going.” (Ecclesiastes 9:10) The dead suffer no more. But the burden of grief falls on surviving relatives and friends. Can anything be done about such suffering?
The pages of God’s Word, the Bible, contain many words of comfort. For example, reading and meditating on the psalms surely is one source of consolation. Comforting, indeed, are such words as these: “Blessed be Jehovah, who daily carries the load for us, the true God of our salvation.”—Psalm 68:19.
Another source of comfort is the Christian congregation. In the first century C.E., the apostle Paul wrote: “Honor widows that are actually widows. But if any widow has children or grandchildren [who can care for her materially], let these learn first to practice godly devotion in their own household and to keep paying a due compensation to their parents and grandparents, for this is acceptable in God’s sight. Let a widow be put on the list who has become not less than sixty years old, a wife of one husband, having a witness borne to her for fine works, if she reared children, if she entertained strangers, if she washed the feet of holy ones, if she relieved those in tribulation, if she diligently followed every good work.” (1 Timothy 5:3, 4, 9, 10) Jehovah’s Witnesses today likewise help and comfort such fellow believers.
Often the greatest adjustment the bereaved have to make is emotional. “I loved my wife dearly,” wrote one man whose mate died two years earlier. “This is the saddest event in my life, and I find it difficult to endure.” A person who has been married for some time has shared his or her life in the most intimate of human relationships. When a marriage mate dies, the surviving partner naturally feels a great loss. To whom can that one turn for help?
In such circumstances, good Christian associates can be upbuilding. “A true companion is loving all the time, and is a brother that is born for when there is distress,” says a wise proverb. (Proverbs 17:17) A widow or widower needs help—companions who give real support. Wise friends encourage the grieving one to talk, even if doing so brings tears. Perhaps a Christian who has already experienced the pain and heartache of losing a mate can offer some kindly help. “Speak consolingly to the depressed,” counsels the Bible. (1 Thessalonians 5:14) But remember that widows and widowers miss their marriage mates. Therefore, the bereaved should confide in others only under circumstances that enable all to maintain chaste conduct.—1 Peter 2:12.
The best antidote for the pain that death inflicts is to keep busy helping others—quite a challenge for those who believe they are the ones in need of help! Here is where unselfishness plays a part. Unselfishly doing things for others helps to banish sadness and grief, for Jesus said: “There is more happiness in giving than there is in receiving.”—Acts 20:35.
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“The Last Enemy” Will Be Defeated!The Watchtower—1993 | November 15
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[Picture on page 5]
Good Christian associates can build the bereaved up spiritually
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