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How Victims Are TargetedAwake!—2004 | May 8
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How Victims Are Targeted
Monika was just out of school when she began working as a clerical trainee in the legal profession. Monika looked forward to a smooth transition into working life.
Horst was a medical doctor in his mid-30’s. He had a wife and children, and all indications were that he would attain recognition and a high income.
Both Monika and Horst became victims of harassment.
THE cases of Monika and Horst teach us a valuable lesson: Victims of mobbing do not fit a predictable profile. Indeed, anyone in any occupation is a potential target for harassment. How, then, can you protect yourself? Part of the answer lies in learning how to pursue peace in the workplace, even with difficult coworkers.
Fitting In at Work
For many, having a job requires fitting in with a team of coworkers and helping that team to function smoothly as a unit. If colleagues get along well with one another, the work benefits. If they do not, the work suffers and the risk of harassment increases.
What can interfere with the smooth running of a team of workers? For one thing, there may be frequent changes in personnel. In such a situation, bonds are difficult to form. In addition, new colleagues are unfamiliar with the routine, which slows down the performance of all. If the work load is growing, the group is likely to be under constant stress.
Moreover, if a team lacks clear goals, there will be little sense of unity. This may be the case, for instance, when an insecure boss spends more time in defending his position than in leading. He might even try to keep the upper hand by pitting colleagues against one another. To make matters worse, the structure of the group may be so loosely defined that certain colleagues do not understand where their responsibility begins and where it ends. For example, conflicts may arise when two employees both think that they have the responsibility of countersigning invoices.
In such a situation, communication becomes strained and hurt feelings are often left unattended. Envy poisons the working atmosphere, and colleagues compete with one another to be in good standing with the boss. Minor misunderstandings are viewed as major insults. In effect, molehills become mountains. The groundwork has been laid for harassment.
The Making of a Scapegoat
Over a period of time, one employee might be singled out as a scapegoat. What sort of person is likely to be treated that way? Probably someone who stands out as different. For example, it could be the only male in a female environment or a female working in a male domain. A confident person might be seen as the pushy sort, while a reserved individual might be perceived as shifty. The potential victim may also be different in the sense that he or she is older or younger than the rest or even better qualified for the job.
Whoever the scapegoat might be, the colleagues “become nasty and brazen toward their chosen victim and thereby sense a feeling of relief from their own personal stress,” reports the German medical journal mta. Attempts by the scapegoat to remedy the situation achieve little success and might even make matters worse. As the intimidation becomes more frequent and systematic, the scapegoat becomes more isolated. At this point, the victim of harassment is likely unable to cope with the situation alone.
Of course, the workplace has always held a potential for mistreatment. But many can remember a time when there seemed to be more goodwill among colleagues. Organized harassment rarely developed. But over the years there has been what one doctor described as “a generally diminishing spirit of solidarity and a broad erosion in the sense of personal shame.” People now have fewer scruples about engaging in open combat at work.
Thus, all who are employed are rightly concerned with the answers to the questions: Can harassment be prevented? How can peace be pursued in the workplace?
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The goal of harassment is to make its victim an outcast
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Pursuing Peace in the WorkplaceAwake!—2004 | May 8
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Pursuing Peace in the Workplace
WHY do some people pick on others? The Bible provides insight into the matter. It explains that we are living in “the last days” of this system of things and that this is why we are experiencing “critical times hard to deal with.” Many people are “lovers of themselves, lovers of money, self-assuming, haughty, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, disloyal, having no natural affection, not open to any agreement, slanderers, without self-control, fierce, without love of goodness, betrayers, headstrong, puffed up with pride.” (2 Timothy 3:1-5) In these turbulent times, such behavior is widespread, and mobbing is one of the unsavory results. How, then, can you pursue peace in the workplace?
Resolving Conflicts
Harassment often begins with an unresolved conflict between workmates. Hence, without being a busybody in the affairs of others, give prompt attention to misunderstandings in which you are personally involved. Calm hurt feelings with tact and respect. Deal with your colleagues as individuals, not as a group. If someone appears to have something against you, try to sort out matters. Keep in mind Jesus’ admonition: “Be about settling matters quickly with the one complaining against you.”—Matthew 5:25.
Furthermore, everyone benefits by keeping the lines of communication open. Try, then, to communicate well with your supervisor without giving the impression that you are merely attempting to curry his favor. Remember, too, that good communication with your peers and subordinates will act as an antidote to stress. King Solomon wrote: “There is a frustrating of plans where there is no confidential talk, but in the multitude of counselors there is accomplishment.”—Proverbs 15:22.
Make every effort, therefore, to get along with your workmates. This does not mean being a “people pleaser,” weakly agreeing to everything that is demanded of you and compromising your principles just to maintain peace. But a warm and friendly manner can melt an icy atmosphere. Be careful not only of what you say to others but of how you say it. Again, the Bible offers sensible advice: “An answer, when mild, turns away rage.” (Proverbs 15:1) “The calmness of the tongue is a tree of life.” (Proverbs 15:4) “By patience a commander is induced.” (Proverbs 25:15) “Let your utterance be always with graciousness, seasoned with salt, so as to know how you ought to give an answer to each one.”—Colossians 4:6.
“Let Your Reasonableness Become Known”
The apostle Paul advised Christians in Philippi: “Let your reasonableness become known to all men.” (Philippians 4:5) Following this principle, set reasonable standards of conduct for yourself. Avoid being either overconfident or too shy. If colleagues tease you, do not try to match them by doing the same. You gain nothing by blurring the boundary between good and bad behavior. Treat others with respect and dignity, and you are more likely to receive the same from them.
Give thought not only to your conduct but also to your dress. Ask yourself: ‘What impression do my clothes give? Is my appearance provocative? Do I present an unkempt appearance? Would I do well to adopt a sensible dress code for work?’
In most cultures, industrious and conscientious workers are respected and highly valued. Hence, try to earn respect by performing high-quality work. Be reliable and trustworthy. This does not mean fretting over every task. One woman who fell victim to harassment later admitted that she had contributed to her own downfall. “I wanted to be perfect,” she says. This woman came to realize that perfection is an impossible goal: “I’m a good worker, but I don’t have to do everything perfectly.”
Do not be oversensitive to negative remarks. Not every unfair criticism is tantamount to harassment. In the Bible, King Solomon wrote: “Do not hurry yourself in your spirit to become offended . . . Also, do not give your heart to all the words that people may speak, . . . for your own heart well knows even many times that you, even you, have called down evil upon others.”—Ecclesiastes 7:9, 21, 22.
Granted, following such sound principles does not guarantee that you will never be the victim of harassment. Despite your best efforts, some colleagues might still pick on you. What then?
Seek Support
“When I got the cold-shoulder treatment for several months, I went through emotional turmoil,” admits Gregory. His experience is typical of victims, who endure a wide range of painful emotions—anger, guilt, shame, confusion, along with feelings of worthlessness. The pressure of being harassed can drive even a normally stable person to despair. Indeed, the Bible states that “mere oppression may make a wise one act crazy.” (Ecclesiastes 7:7) So, what can be done?
Studies indicate that it is best not to try to deal with harassment on your own. Where can a victim find support? Some larger companies have established a means for assisting their employees who feel that they are being intimidated. Such companies know that it is in their own best interests to eradicate harassment. According to one estimate, workers who harass a victim are distracted for up to 10 percent of their working time. Wherever such an arrangement is available, a victim could seek help. A neutral counselor—either from within the employer’s organization or from outside—might open the way for all parties to discuss the situation and lay down rules of conduct at work.
No Guaranteed Remedy
Of course, it must be acknowledged that there is no guaranteed remedy for harassment. Even those who apply the Bible principles outlined in this article may find that mistreatment on the job persists. Such ones can be certain that their endurance and their efforts to display godly qualities amid adversity do not go unnoticed by Jehovah God.—2 Chronicles 16:9; Jeremiah 17:10.
Depending upon the level and frequency of the mistreatment, some in this situation choose to look for other employment. Others have little choice, as jobs may be scarce and resources that could provide help may be few. Monika, mentioned in the preceding article, found that, in time, the problem was taken care of when one of the main harassers left the job. As a result, the work atmosphere entered a period of relative calm, and she was able to complete her training before deciding to find work elsewhere.
For Peter, mentioned in the first article, complete relief came through early retirement. Even when enduring the harassment, however, Peter benefited from the support of his wife. “She knew what I was going through, and she was a tower of strength,” he says. While enduring their trials, Monika and Peter drew particular comfort from their faith as Jehovah’s Witnesses. Engaging in the public ministry strengthened their feelings of self-respect, while association with fellow believers reaffirmed their stable friendships.
Whatever your situation, do your best to pursue good relations in the workplace. If you are harassed, strive to follow the apostle Paul’s admonition: “Return evil for evil to no one. . . . If possible, as far as it depends upon you, be peaceable with all men. . . . Do not let yourself be conquered by the evil, but keep conquering the evil with the good.”—Romans 12:17-21.
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A friendly manner can melt an icy atmosphere
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“If possible, as far as it depends upon you, be peaceable with all men.”—ROMANS 12:18
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Give prompt attention to personal misunderstandings
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