Ukuba Ngubawo Nokuba Ngumdala—Ukuyiphumeza Yomibini Le Misebenzi

“Ukuba eneneni nawuphi na umntu akayazi indlela yokongamela eyakhe indlu, uya kulinyamekela njani ibandla likaThixo?”—1 TIMOTI 3:5.

 1, 2. (a) Ngenkulungwane yokuqala, abaveleli abangatshatanga nabatshatileyo abangenabantwana babekwazi njani ukukhonza abazalwana babo? (b) UAkwila noPrisila bangumzekelo njani kwizibini ezininzi ezitshatileyo namhlanje?

ABAVELELI bebandla lamaKristu lokuqala babengamadoda angatshatanga okanye amadoda atshatileyo kodwa angenabantwana okanye atshatileyo anabantwana. Ngokungathandabuzekiyo wambi kuloo maKristu alilandela icebiso lompostile uPawulos elikwileta yakhe yokuqala yabaseKorinte, isahluko 7, aza ahlala engatshatanga. UYesu wathi: “Kukho amathenwa azenze amathenwa ngenxa yobukumkani bamazulu.” (Mateyu 19:12) Loo madoda angatshatanga, njengoPawulos yaye mhlawumbi namanye awayehambahamba nawo, ayenenkululeko yokuya naphi na ukuze ancede abazalwana bawo.

² IBhayibhile ayichazi enoba uBharnabhas, uMarko, uSilas, uLuka, uTimoti noTito babengatshatanga kusini na. Ukuba babetshatile, kubonakala ukuba babengenazimbopheleleko zentsapho kuba babekwazi ukuya kwiindawo ezikude kwizabelo ezahlukahlukeneyo. (IZenzo 13:2; 15:39-41; 2 Korinte 8:16, 17; 2 Timoti 4:9-11; Tito 1:5) Basenokuba babehamba nabafazi babo, njengoPetros ‘nabanye abapostile,’ ekubonakala ukuba babehamba nabafazi babo xa besiya kwiindawo ngeendawo. (1 Korinte 9:5) UAkwila noPrisila bangumzekelo wesibini esitshatileyo esasikulungele ukuhlala kwiindawo ngeendawo, belandela uPawulos ukusuka eKorinte ukuya e-Efese, badlulela eRoma, baphinda babuyela e-Efese. IBhayibhile ayichazi enoba babenabantwana kusini na. Inkonzo yabo yomphefumlo uphela ngenxa yabazalwana babo yabenza baxatyiswa ngawo “onke amabandla eentlanga.” (Roma 16:3-5; IZenzo 18:2, 18; 2 Timoti 4:19) Namhlanje, ngokungathandabuzekiyo kukho izibini ezitshatileyo ezininzi, ezinokukhonza amanye amabandla, njengoAkwila noPrisila, mhlawumbi ngokufudukela apho imfuneko inkulu khona.

Ukuba Ngubawo Nokuba Ngumdala

 3. Yintoni ebonisa ukuba abadala abaninzi benkulungwane yokuqala babengamadoda atshatileyo naneentsapho?

³ Kubonakala ngathi ngenkulungwane yokuqala yeXesha lethu Eliqhelekileyo, inkoliso yabadala abangamaKristu yayingamadoda atshatileyo anabantwana. Xa uPawulos wayesandlala iimfaneleko zendoda ‘ezabalazela isikhundla sobuveleli,’ wabonisa ukuba loo mKristu ufanele abe “ngumntu oyongamela kakuhle indlu yakhe, enabantwana abathobelayo ngako konke ukundileka.”—1 Timoti 3:1, 4.

 4. Kwakufuneka ntoni kubadala abatshatileyo nabanabantwana?

⁴ Njengoko sibonile, kwakunganyanzelekanga ukuba umveleli abe nabantwana, okanye atshate. Kodwa ukuba wayetshatile, ukuze afaneleke njengomdala okanye isicaka solungiselelo, umKristu wayefanele abubonakalise kakuhle nangothando ubuntloko kumfazi wakhe yaye azingqine ekwazi ukubagcina bethobela abantwana bakhe. (1 Korinte 11:3; 1 Timoti 3:12, 13) Nabuphi ubuthathaka obunzulu ekongameleni indlu yakhe babuza kwenza umzalwana angawafanelekeli amalungelo akhethekileyo ebandleni. Ngoba? UPawulos uyachaza: “Ukuba eneneni nawuphi na umntu akayazi indlela yokongamela eyakhe indlu, uya kulinyamekela njani ibandla likaThixo?” (1 Timoti 3:5) Ukuba intsapho yakhe yayingavumi ukuzithoba kulwalathiso lwakhe, babeya kusabela njani abanye?

“Enabantwana Abakholwayo”

 5, 6. (a) Ngokuphathelele abantwana, uPawulos wakhankanya yiphi imfanelo kuTito? (b) Kulindelwe ntoni kubadala abanabantwana?

⁵ Xa wayeyalela uTito ukuba amisele abaveleli kumabandla aseKrete, uPawulos wathi: “Ukuba kukho nawuphi na umntu ongenakumangaleleka, indoda yamfazi mnye, enabantwana abakholwayo ababengamangalelwa ngoburheletyo nababengengabo abangalawulekiyo. Kuba umveleli umele abe ngongenakumangaleleka njengegosa likaThixo.” Eneneni ibandakanya ntoni imfanelo ‘yokuba nabantwana abakholwayo’?—Tito 1:6, 7.

⁶ Ibinzana elithi “abantwana abakholwayo” libhekisela kubantwana abasele bebahlulele kuYehova ubomi babo nabasele bebhaptiziwe okanye kwabaselula abasebenzela ukuzahlulela nokubhaptizwa. Amalungu ebandla alindele ukuba abantwana babadala babe nesimilo nentobelo. Kufanele kucace ukuba umdala wenza konke anako ukwakha ukholo ebantwaneni bakhe. UKumkani uSolomon wabhala: “Mfundise umntwana ngendlela efanele umntwana; naxa athe wamkhulu, akasayi kumka kuyo.” (IMizekeliso 22:6) Kodwa kuthekani ukuba oselula olufumeneyo uqeqesho olunjalo akafuni ukumkhonza uYehova okanye ude enze isono esinzulu?

 7. (a) Kutheni kucacile nje ukuba iMizekeliso 22:6 ayidluliseli umthetho ongaguqukiyo? (b) Ukuba umntwana womdala ukhetha ukungamkhonzi uYehova, kutheni oko kungayi kuthi ngokuzenzekelayo kumenze umdala aphulukane namalungelo akhe?

⁷ Licacile elokuba umzekeliso ocatshulwe ngasentla awumiseli mthetho ungaguqukiyo. Awuwenzi ungasebenzi umgaqo wenkululeko yokuzikhethela. (Duteronomi 30:15, 16, 19) Xa unyana okanye intombi ifikelela kubudala obaneleyo, ifanele izenzele isigqibo sobuqu ngokuphathelele uzahlulelo nobhaptizo. Ukuba umdala umnike uncedo, ukhokelo noqeqesho lokomoya olufunekayo, sekunjalo oselula akhethe ukungamkhonzi uYehova, oko akuthi ngokuzenzekelayo kumenze angakufanelekeli ubawo ukukhonza njengomveleli. Kwelinye icala, ukuba umdala unabantwana abaliqela abaselula abasahlala ekhaya, baze ngokulandelelana babe buthathaka ngokomoya yaye bangene ezinkathazweni, usenokuyeka ukugqalwa ‘njengomntu oyongamela kakuhle indlu yakhe.’ (1 Timoti 3:4) Ingongoma yile, kufanele kubonakale ukuba umveleli wenza unako nako ukuze abe ‘nabantwana abakholwayo abangamangalelwa ngoburheletyo nokungalawuleki.’a

Utshate “Nomfazi Ongakholwayo”

 8. Umdala ufanele amphathe njani umfazi wakhe ongakholwayo?

⁸ Ngokuphathelele amadoda angamaKristu atshate nabangakholwayo, uPawulos wabhala: “Ukuba nawuphi na umzalwana unomfazi ongakholwayo, ukanti yena evumelana nokuhlala naye, makangamshiyi . . . Kuba . . . nomfazi ongakholwayo uyangcwaliswa ngokuphathelele umzalwana; kungenjalo, abantwana benu ngokwenene bebeya kuba ngabangahlambulukanga, kodwa ngoku bangcwele. Kuba, . . . ndoda, wazi njani na ukuba akuyi kumsindisa umfazi wakho?” (1 Korinte 7:12-14, 16) Igama elithi “ongakholwayo” alibhekiseli kumfazi ongakholelwayo elunqulweni kodwa kongazahlulelanga kuYehova. Wayesenokuba ngumYuda, okanye umntu okholelwa koothixo babahedeni. Namhlanje, umdala usenokuba utshate nomfazi okunqulo olwahlukileyo, okholelwa kwelokuba uThixo akanakwaziwa, okanye ongabukholelwayo ubukho bukaThixo. Ukuba ukulungele ukuhlala naye, akafanele amshiye kuba nje eneenkolelo ezahlukileyo. Ufanele ‘ahlale naye ngokokwazi, emnika imbeko njengesitya esibuthathaka ngakumbi, esobukhomokazi,’ ngethemba lokuba uya kumsindisa.—1 Petros 3:7; Kolose 3:19.

 9. Kumazwe anomthetho othi indoda nomfazi banelungelo lokubafundisa abantwana babo iinkolelo zabo zonqulo, umdala ufanele enze ntoni, yaye oku kuya kuwachaphazela njani amalungelo akhe?

⁹ Ukuba umveleli unabantwana, uya kububonakalisa ngokufanelekileyo ubuntloko njengomyeni nobawo ngokubakhulisa “kwingqeqesho nasekweyiselweni kwengqondo kuYehova.” (Efese 6:4) Kumazwe amaninzi umthetho ulinikela kuwo omabini amaqabane omtshato ilungelo lokubaqeqesha ngokonqulo abantwana babo. Kule nkalo umfazi usenokufuna ukusebenzisa ilungelo lakhe ngokufundisa abantwana iinkolelo noqheliselo lonqulo lwakhe, nto leyo esenokuquka ukubasa ecaweni yakhe.b Kakade ke, abantwana bafanele balandele izazela zabo eziqeqeshwe ngeBhayibhile ngokuphathelele ukungatheleli kwimithendeleko yonqulo lobuxoki. Njengentloko-ntsapho, ubawo uya kusebenzisa ilungelo lakhe lokufundisisa nabantwana bakhe aze aye nabo ezintlanganisweni kwiHolo yoBukumkani xa kunokwenzeka. Xa befikelela kubudala bokuba bazenzele izigqibo, baya kuzikhethela indlela abafuna ukuyihamba. (Yoshuwa 24:15) Ukuba abanye abadala namalungu ebandla bayabona ukuba wenza konke anako nokusemthethweni ukubafundisa kakuhle abantwana bakhe ngendlela yenyaniso, akasayi kugqalwa njengongafanelekiyo njengomveleli.

‘Uyongamela Kakuhle Indlu Yakhe’

10. Ukuba intloko-ntsapho ingumdala, yiyiphi imbopheleleko yayo ephambili?

¹⁰ Kwanakumdala ongubawo nonomfazi ongumKristu, akukho lula ukulaba kakuhle ixesha anokulichitha enikela ingqalelo kumfazi wakhe, abantwana nakwimisebenzi yebandla. IZibhalo zilibeka ngokuphandle elokuba ubawo ongumKristu unembopheleleko yokunyamekela umfazi nabantwana bakhe. UPawulos wabhala: “Ngokuqinisekileyo ukuba nabani na akabalungiseleli abo bangabakhe, yaye ngokukodwa abo bangamalungu endlu yakhe, ulukhanyele ukholo kwaye mbi ngakumbi kunomntu ongenalo ukholo.” (1 Timoti 5:8) Kwakuloo leta, uPawulos wabonisa ukuba ngamadoda atshatileyo kuphela asele ezingqine engabayeni noobawo abalungileyo afanele anconyelwe ukukhonza njengabaveleli.—1 Timoti 3:1-5.

11. (a) Ziziphi iindlela umdala afanele ‘abalungiselele ngazo abakhe’? (b) Oku kunokumnceda njani umdala asingathe iimbopheleleko zakhe zebandla?

¹¹ Umdala ufanele ‘abalungiselele’ abakhe kungekhona ngezinto eziphathekayo kuphela kodwa nangokomoya nangokweemvakalelo. UKumkani uSolomon osisilumko wabhala: “Lilungise ishishini lakho phandle, uzisebenzele entsimini yakho; emveni koko wakhe indlu yakho.” (IMizekeliso 24:27) Ngoko ngoxa emxhasa ngezinto eziphathekayo, ngokweemvakalelo yaye enexesha lokuzonwabisa nomfazi nabantwana bakhe, umveleli ufanele abakhe nangokomoya. Oku kufuna ixesha—ixesha angenako ukulinikela kwimicimbi yebandla. Kodwa lixesha elinokuvelisa isiqhamo esityebileyo xa sicinga ngolonwabo nemeko yokomoya yentsapho. Ekuhambeni kwexesha, ukuba intsapho yakhe yomelele ngokomoya, loo mdala usenokuchitha ixesha elincinane ngakumbi esingatha iingxaki zentsapho. Oku kuya kwenza ingqondo yakhe ikhululeke ngakumbi ukuba anyamekele imicimbi yebandla. Umzekelo wakhe njengomyeni nobawo olungileyo uya kulenza lingenelwe ibandla ngokomoya.—1 Petros 5:1-3.

12. Oobawo abangabadala bafanele bamisele umzekelo omhle kuwuphi umbandela wentsapho?

¹² Ukuyongamela kakuhle indlu kuquka ukubekela bucala ixesha lokuqhuba isifundo sentsapho. Kubaluleke ngokukodwa ukuba abadala bamisele umzekelo omhle kule nkalo, kuba iintsapho eziluqilima zenza ibandla lomelele. Umveleli akafanelanga ahlale elichithela kwamanye amalungelo enkonzo lonke ixesha lakhe kangangokuba angabi nalo ixesha lokufundisisa nomfazi nabantwana bakhe. Ukuba oku bekusoloko kunjalo, ufanele aluhlolisise ngokutsha ucwangciso lwakhe. Kusenokufuneka alihlengahlengise okanye alinciphise ixesha alichitha kweminye imicimbi, yaye angawamkeli amalungelo athile ngamanye amaxesha.

Ukongamela Ngendlela Elungeleleneyo

13, 14. Sisiphi isiluleko ebesidluliselwa “likhoboka elithembekileyo neliyingqondi” kubadala abaziintloko-ntsapho?

¹³ Isiluleko sokulungelelanisa iimbopheleleko zentsapho nezebandla asikho sitsha. Kangangeminyaka “ikhoboka elithembekileyo neliyingqondi” belibanika iziluleko abadala ngalo mbandela. (Mateyu 24:45) Kwiminyaka engaphezu kwama-37 edluleyo, iThe Watchtower kaSeptemba 15, 1959, iphepha 553 nelama-554, yacebisa oku: “Ngenene, aliyonyaniso na elokuba lo ngumbandela wokuzilungelelanisa kwixesha lethu zonke ezi mbopheleleko? Koko kulungelelanisa, elona xesha lininzi lifanele linikelwe kwizilangazelelo zentsapho yakho. Ngokuqinisekileyo uYehova uThixo akasayi kulindela ukuba indoda isebenzise lonke ixesha layo kwimicimbi yebandla, inceda abazalwana nabamelwane bayo ukuze bafumane usindiso, ize sekunjalo ingazikhathazi ngokusindiswa kwendlu yayo. Imbopheleleko ephambili yendoda ngumfazi nabantwana bayo.”

¹⁴ IMboniselo kaNovemba 1, 1986, iphepha 22, yaluleka ngelithi: ‘Ukubandakanyeka kubulungiseleli basentsimini njengentsapho kuya kunisondeza ngakumbi, kanti iimfuno ezikhethekileyo zabantwana zifuna nichithe ixesha namandla enu angokweemvakalelo. Ngoko ke, kufuneka ukulungelelana ukuze kugqitywe ngobungakanani bexesha elinokuchithwa kwimisebenzi yebandla ngoxa ukwabanyamekela ngokomoya, ngokweemvakalelo nangokuphathekayo “abo bangabenu.” [UmKristu] umele “ukuqala afunde ukuhlonela elakhe ikhaya.” (1 Timoti 5:4, 8)’

15. Kutheni umdala onomfazi nabantwana efanele asebenzise ubulumko nengqiqo?

¹⁵ Umzekeliso oseZibhalweni uthi: “Indlu yona yakhiwa ngobulumko; izinziswe ngengqondo.” (IMizekeliso 24:3) Ewe, ukuze umveleli aziphumeze izabelo zakhe zobuthixo aze kwangaxeshanye akhe indlu yakhe, ngokwenene kufuneka asebenzise ubulumko nengqiqo. Ngokutsho kweZibhalo, unemimandla eliqela ekufuneka ayongamele. Kuquka intsapho yakhe neembopheleleko zebandla. Kufuneka asebenzise ingqiqo ukuze ilungelelane kakuhle. (Filipi 1:9, 10) Kufuneka asebenzise ubulumko ukuze azibeke kwindawo yokuqala izinto zokuqala. (IMizekeliso 2:10, 11) Enoba uziva ekufuna kangakanani na ukunyamekela amalungelo akhe ebandla, ufanele aqonde ukuba njengomyeni nobawo, imbopheleleko yakhe ephambili evela kuThixo yintlalo-ntle nokusinda kwentsapho yakhe.

Oobawo Abalungileyo Kwanabadala Abalungileyo

16. Ungenelwa njani umdala ukuba ukwangubawo?

¹⁶ Umdala onabantwana abanesimilo unokuba luncedo kakhulu. Ukuba ukwazile ukuyinyamekela intsapho yakhe, unako ukunceda nezinye iintsapho ezisebandleni. Uziqonda kakuhle ngakumbi iingxaki zazo yaye unokudlulisela isiluleko ngokusuka kumava obuqu. Okuvuyisayo kukuba amawaka abadala ehlabathini lonke aqhuba kakuhle njengabayeni, oobawo nabaveleli.

17. (a) Yintoni efanele ingaze iyilibale indoda engubawo nekwangumdala? (b) Amanye amalungu ebandla afanele alubonakalise njani ulwazelelelo?

¹⁷ Ukuze intloko-ntsapho ibe ngumdala, imele ibe ngumKristu oqolileyo, onako ukulungelelanisa imicimbi yakhe ukuze akwazi ukunikela ixesha nengqalelo kwabanye abasebandleni, ngoxa emnyamekela umfazi nabantwana bakhe. Ufanele angaze alibale ukuba umsebenzi wakhe wokwalusa uqalisa ekhaya. Ngenxa yokwazi ukuba abadala abanabafazi nabantwana banembopheleleko yentsapho yabo neyebandla, amalungu ebandla akasayi kuzama ukufuna ngokungekho ngqiqweni ukuba achithe ixesha kunye nawo. Ngokomzekelo, umdala onabantwana ekufuneka baye esikolweni ngentsasa elandelayo akasoloko ekwazi ukuhlala ixesha elithile emva kweentlanganiso zangokuhlwa. Amanye amalungu ebandla afanele akuqonde oku yaye abonakalise imvakalelo yobudlelane.—Filipi 4:5.

Sifanele Sibathande Abadala Bethu

18, 19. (a) Ukuhlolisisa kwethu eyoku-1 kwabaseKorinte isahluko 7 kusenze saqonda ntoni? (b) Sifanele siwagqale njani amadoda angamaKristu anjalo?

¹⁸ Ukuhlolisisa kwethu isahluko 7 seleta yokuqala kaPawulos yabaseKorinte kusenze sabona ukuba, elandela icebiso likaPawulos, kukho amadoda angatshatanga amaninzi asebenzisa inkululeko yawo ekuhambiseleni phambili izilangazelelo zoBukumkani. Kukho namawaka abazalwana abatshatileyo abangenabantwana, ngoxa benikela ingqalelo efanelekileyo kubafazi babo, bakhonza kakuhle njengabaveleli bezithili, beziphaluka, bamabandla nabamasebe eWatch Tower, bexhaswa ngabafazi babo abanentsebenziswano. Ekuphetheni, kumabandla abantu bakaYehova amalunga nama-80 000, kukho oobawo abaninzi abanganyamekeli abafazi nabantwana babo kuphela kodwa abachitha ixesha labo bekhonza abazalwana babo njengabalusi abanothando.—IZenzo 20:28.

¹⁹ Umpostile uPawulos wabhala: “Amadoda amakhulu awongamela ngendlela entle makabalelwe ekuthini afanelwe yimbeko ephindiweyo, ngokukodwa lawo asebenza nzima ekuthetheni nasekufundiseni.” (1 Timoti 5:17) Ewe, sifanele sibathande yaye sibahlonele abadala abongamela ngendlela entle emakhayeni abo nasebandleni. Ngenene sifanele ‘sibaphathe ngembeko abantu abalolo hlobo.’—Filipi 2:29.

[Imibhalo esemazantsi]

Impinda

◻ Sazi njani ukuba abadala abaninzi benkulungwane yokuqala yeXesha lethu Eliqhelekileyo babeziintloko-ntsapho?

◻ Kufuneka ntoni kubadala abatshatileyo abanabantwana, yaye ngoba?

◻ Kuthetha ukuthini ukuba “nabantwana abakholwayo,” kodwa kuthekani ukuba umntwana womdala ukhetha ukungamkhonzi uYehova?

◻ Kuphantsi kwaziphi iinkalo afanele umdala ‘alungiselele abo bangabakhe’?

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 23]

Iintsapho eziluqilima zenza amabandla omeleleyo