Abantu Abaselula Bayabuza . . .

Ndinokuzilawula Njani Iimvakalelo Zam?

“Ndikhe ndicatshukiswe ngabazali bam ndize ndithethe ndingacinganga. Ndiye ndibaqumbele de idlule loo nto.—UKate, oneminyaka eli-13 ubudala.

“Eyona ngxaki yam kukungazithembi. Ikh’ inditye ke loo nto maxa wambi.”—UIvan, oneminyaka eli-19 ubudala.

ZINAMANDLA iimvakalelo. Ziba negalelo kwindlela ocinga nowenza ngayo izinto. Zinokukuqhubela ekubeni wenze izinto ezintle okanye ezimbi. Kanti zisenokukongamela maxa wambi. UJacob oneminyaka engama-20 ubudala uthi: “Andizenzi izinto ngendlela efanelekileyo. Ndisoloko ndingalufikeleli usukelo endizibekele lona. Ndikhe ndilile okanye ndibe nomsindo kangangokude ndiphos’ ityala kwabo bandingqongileyo. Kunzima ukulawula indlela endivakalelwa ngayo.”

Noko ke, ukuze ube ngumntu oqolileyo nochubekileyo, ufanele ufunde ukulawula iimvakalelo zakho. Kangangokuba ezinye iingcali zithi akuncedi nto ukuba krelekrele, ukuba akukwazi ukulawula iimvakalelo zakho nokusebenzisana nabantu. Ngapha koko neBhayibhile ikuchaza njengokuxabiseke gqitha ukulawula iimvakalelo zakho. Ngokomzekelo, IMizekeliso 25:28 ithi: “Ukuba akukwazi ukulawula umsindo wakho, akukhuselekanga kanye njengesixeko esingenazindonga, nesisesichengeni sokuhlaselwa.” (Today’s English Version) Yintoni enokukwenza kube nzima ukulawula iimvakalelo zakho?

Ucelomngeni Kulutsha

Abantu abaselula nabakhulileyo nabaneemvelaphi ezahlukahlukeneyo bazama ngamandla ukulawula iimvakalelo zabo. Kodwa ke, oku kunokuba lucelomngeni nangakumbi kumlisela nomthinjana osele ufikelela kubuntu obukhulu. Incwadi ebhalwe nguRuth Bell ethi Changing Bodies, Changing Lives ithi: “Ulutsha oluninzi luvakalelwa ngeendlela ezininzi nezahlukahlukeneyo. Abantu abaninzi bavakalelwa ngeendlela ezahlukahlukeneyo ngezinto ezifanayo. . . . Indlela abavakalelwa ngayo isenokutshintsha nje ngesiquphe.”

Njengomntu oselula, akukabi namava. (IMizekeliso 1:4) Njengoko uqala ukudibana neengxaki ezintsha, kuyinto eqhelekileyo ukungazithembi nokuziva ngathi uza koyisakala. Ngethamsanqa, uMdali wakho uzazi kakuhle iimvakalelo zakho. Wazi ‘neengcamango ezikuphazamisayo.’ (INdumiso 139:23) Uyibhalile eLizwini lakhe imigaqo enokukunceda.

Indlela Onokuzilawula Ngayo Iimvakalelo Zakho

Enye indlela yokulawula iimvakalelo zakho kukufunda ukulawula iingcinga zakho. Iingcinga ezikhathazayo zinokukutheza amandla. (IMizekeliso 24:10) Kodwa unokucinga njani ngendlela eyakhayo uze ukwazi ukulawula iimvakalelo zakho?

Enye indlela kukuyeka ukusoloko ucinga izinto ezingakhiyo ezikudandathekisayo zize zikwenze uzive ungazithembi. Ngokulandela icebiso leBhayibhile lokunikela ingqalelo kwizinto ‘ezizezenkxalabo enzulu nezibubulungisa,’ unokulwa neengcamango ezingakhiyo. (Filipi 4:8) Kusenokungabi lula ukwenjenjalo, kodwa kufuna umgudu.

Cinga nje ngebhinqa eliselula ekuthiwa nguJasmine. Ukhala ngelithi: “Kunzima. Ndisandul’ ukufumana omnye umsebenzi, ndikwanazo nezinye iimbopheleleko. Ndithezeke amandla. Akukho nokuphumla.” Akuyonto inqabileyo ukudibana noselula evakalelwa ngaloo ndlela maxa wambi, yaye loo nto inokumenza angazithembi. IBhayibhile isixelela ngomfana ogama linguTimoti, owayezifanelekela kakuhle iimbopheleleko awayezinikiwe. Sekunjalo, kubonakala ngathi wayenengxaki yokuziva engafaneleki.—1 Timoti 4:11-16; 2 Timoti 1:6, 7.

Kusenokwenzeka ukuba nawe akuzithembi xa kufuneka wenze umsebenzi omtsha okanye ongaqhelananga nawo. Usenokuzixelela ukuba, ‘Andinakuze ndikwazi ukuyenza le nto.’ Kodwa unokulwa nokungazithembi ngokuyeka ukuzisizela. Cinga ngendlela onokuwenza ngayo loo msebenzi ngobuchule. Buza abanye uze ulandele ulwalathiso.—IMizekeliso 1:5, 7.

Xa uwenza ngobuchule lo msebenzi, nokungazithembi kuya kuphela. Musa ukusoloko ucinga ngeentsilelo zakho, nto leyo enokukwenza ungazimiseli ngokwaneleyo ukuphucula. Umpostile uPawulos wakha wathi xa wayehlatyw’ amadlala: “Nokuba andinabuchule ngentetho, ngokuqinisekileyo andinjalo ngolwazi.” (2 Korinte 10:10; 11:6) Ngokufanayo, unako ukuzithemba xa uqonda izinto okwazi ukuzenza kakuhle uze ucele uThixo akuncedise uhlangabezane nobuthathaka bakho. Ngokwenene uThixo unokukunceda, kanye njengoko wenzayo kubantu bakhe bamandulo.—Eksodus 4:10.

Eny’ into enokukunceda ulawule iimvakalelo zakho kukuzibekela usukelo olusengqiqweni, uyiqonde into yokuba usikelwe umda. Kanti musa ukuzithelekisa nabanye. KwabaseGalati 6:4, iBhayibhile isinika icebiso elihle xa isithi: “Ngamnye makangqine oko ukuko umsebenzi wakhe, uya kwandula ke abe nesizathu sokugcoba ngaye siqu, kungekhona ngokuzithelekisa nomnye umntu.”

Ukuzeka Kade Umsindo

Eny’ into enokuba lucelomngeni kukulawula umsindo. Kanye njengoKate, esithethe ngaye ekuqaleni, umsindo wenza abantwana abaninzi bathethe baze benze izinto ezenz’ intliziyo ebuhlungu.

Ewe, iqhelekile into yokucaphuka ngamaxesha athile. Kodwa khumbula umbulali wokuqala, uKayin. Wathi ‘akuvutha kakhulu ngumsindo,’ uThixo wathi makawulumkele kuba ungamkhokelela ekwenzeni isono esinzulu. Wabuza kuKayin: “Ngaba wena uya kusongamela na [isono]?” (Genesis 4:5-7) UKayin akazange alithobele icebiso likaThixo, kodwa uThixo angakunceda ukwazi ukuwulawula umsindo uze ukuphephe ukwenza isono!

Kanti oku kuthetha ukulawula iingcinga zakho. KwiMizekeliso 19:11, iBhayibhile ithi: “Ingqiqo yomntu ngokuqinisekileyo imenza azeke kade umsindo, yaye kuyinto entle kuye ukukubetha ngoyaba ukunxaxha.” Xa kukho umntu okucaphukisayo, zama ukuqonda isizathu sokwenza kwakhe ngolo hlobo. Ngaba ukucaphukisa ngabom? Ngaba ukwenze oko engacinganga okanye engazi? Ukunyamezela iimpazamo zabanye kubonisa ukuba sixelisa inceba kaThixo, yaye loo nto inokukunceda uzeke kade umsindo.

Kuthekani ukuba ubufanele ukucaphuka? IZibhalo zithi: “Qumbani, kodwa ningoni.” (Efese 4:26) Ukuba kunokwenzeka yithethe le nto naloo mntu ukucaphukisileyo. (Mateyu 5:23, 24) Okanye mhlawumbi usenokusuka nje uyiyeke loo nto—uyeke ukucaphuka uze uqhubeke nobomi bakho.

Ibangel’ umdla into yokuba, abahlobo bakho banokuba negalelo kwindlela owulawula ngayo umsindo. Ngenxa yoko iBhayibhile iyalela ngelithi: “Musa ukuba liqabane lakhe nabani na onomsindo; yaye ungahlali nomntu obhabhama ngumsindo, khon’ ukuze ungaqhelani nomendo wakhe kuze oko kube ngumgibe emphefumlweni wakho.”—IMizekeliso 22:24, 25.

Ukuhlala nabantu abenza umgudu wokulawula umsindo wabo kunokukunceda nawe ukuba uwulawule. Amabandla amaKristu amaNgqina kaYehova azaliswe ngabantu abaqole ngolo hlobo yaye abaninzi kubo badala yaye banamava kunawe. Qhelana nabanye babo. Jonga indlela abahlangabezana ngayo neengxaki. Kanti basenokukunika ‘ulwalathiso lobuchule’ xa usebunzimeni. (IMizekeliso 24:6) UJacob, ocatshulwe ngaphambilana uthi: “Ndimxabisa gqitha umhlobo oqolileyo nondikhumbuza ngoko kuthethwa liLizwi likaThixo. Ndithi ndakukhumbula ukuba uYehova uyandithanda nakuba ndingazithembanga, loo nto indenze ndizive ndikwazi ukulawula iimvakalelo zam.”

Amanye Amacebiso Aluncedo

Enye incwadi edumileyo yomthambo ithi: “Uhlolisiso oluninzi olwenziweyo lungqina ukuba indlela oshukuma ngayo umzimba wakho yenza imichiza esemzimbeni wakho ibe negalelo kwindlela ovakalelwa ngayo. Umlinganiselo wencindi yamadlala neoksijini uyatshintshwa luhlobo lweentshukumo ozenzayo.” Ngaphandle kwamathandabuzo, ukwenza umthambo kuyingenelo. IBhayibhile isixelela oku: “Ingqeqesho yomzimba inoncedo oluthile.” (1 Timoti 4:8, Today’s English Version) Kutheni ungazibekeli ucwangciso olusengqiqweni lokwenza umthambo rhoqo? Unokuba negalelo kwindlela ovakalelwa ngayo. Eny’ into enokukunceda kukutya ngendlela esempilweni.

Kanti khawuhlolisise umculo nendlela yokuzonwabisa oyithandayo. Uhlolisiso olwapapashwa kwiThe Harvard Mental Health Letter lwathi: “Ukubukela ugonyamelo . . . kudla ngokuphembelela umsindo nokuba ndlongondlongo. . . . Abantu ababukela imifanekiso eshukumayo enobundlobongela badla ngokuba ndlongondlongo baze baxinezeleke gqitha.” Ngoko zikhethe ngobulumko izinto oziphulaphulayo nozibukelayo.—INdumiso 1:1-3; 1 Korinte 15:33.

Ekugqibeleni eyona nto inokukunceda ulawule iimvakalelo zakho kukuba nobuhlobo obusenyongweni noMdali wakho. Ukhuthaza ngamnye kuthi ukuba athandaze kuye aze aphalaze imbilini yakhe. Umpostile uPawulos wakhuthaza ngelithi: “Musani ukuxhalela nantoni na, kodwa ezintweni zonke zaziseni izibongozo zenu kuThixo ngomthandazo nesikhungo nombulelo; yaye uxolo lukaThixo olungaphaya kokuqonda luya kuzilinda iintliziyo zenu namandla enu engqondo.” Ewe, unokukhulisa amandla okujamelana nayo nayiphi na imeko ebomini. Umpostile uPawulos wongezelela ngelithi: “Ezintweni zonke ndinamandla ngenxa yalowo undomelezayo.”—Filipi 4:6, 7, 13.

UMalika oselula uthi: “Ndifunde ukuzingisa emthandazweni. Ukwazi ukuba uYehova undikhathalele kundithob’ izibilini kuze kundincede ndilawule iimvakalelo zam.” Nawe, uThixo unokukunceda ufunde ukulawula iimvakalelo zakho.

[Amagama acatshulweyo akwiphepha 29]

Enye indlela yokulawula iimvakalelo zakho kukufunda ukulawula iingcinga zakho

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 30]

Ukunxulumana nabantu abakhulileyo kunokukunceda ulawule iimvakalelo zakho