Ukuzala Abantwana Okucatshangelwe Kahle Kulesikhathi Sokugcina
“Abusa kahle abantwana bawo.”—1 THIMOTHEWU 3:12.
1. Yisiphi isifiso semvelo sabesifazane abaningi, futhi lesi sizibonakalisa kanjani lapho besakhula?
INJABULO yokuba umzali ayinakuphikwa. Umzwelo wokuba umama ungokwemvelo, nakuba unamandla kwabanye abesifazane kunakwabanye. Emazweni amaningi aseNtshonalanga, abafanyana bathanda kakhulu ukudlala ngamathoyizi emishini lapho amantombazanyana ethanda onodoli, abenzi bamathoyizi abalwela ukubenza babonakale banjengezingane ezingokoqobo ngangokunokwenzeka. Amantombazane amaningi aphilela nje ukubona usuku ayokwazi ngalo ukugona izingane zawo eziphilayo, ezifudumele, ezibhibhidlayo, hhayi unodoli.
Izinjabulo Nemithwalo Yemfanelo
2. Abazali kufanele bayibheke kanjani ingane esand’ ukuzalwa, futhi yini okumelwe balungele ukuyiqala?
2 Ukuzala abantwana okucatshangelwe kahle kudinga abazali ukuba bangabheki ingane esand’ ukuzalwa njengento yokudlala kodwa njengesidalwa abazolandisa ngokuphila kwaso nekusasa laso kuMdali. Lapho beletha umntwana emhlabeni, abazali kumelwe bakulungele ukuthwala umthwalo wemfanelo omkhulu futhi bazivumelanise ngokufanelekile. Baqalisa isimiso seminyaka engama-20 sokondla, ukwembathisa, ukunakekela impilo, nokufundisa, esimiphumela yaso ingenakwaziwa kusengaphambili.
3. Kungani izAga 23:24, 25 zingasebenza kubazali abaningi abangamaKristu?
3 Ngokujabulisayo, abazali abaningi abangamaKristu baye bakhulisa abantwana abaye baba izinceku zikaJehova ezithembekile nezizinikezele. Abanye baye babona abantwana babo bekhula futhi bengenela inkonzo yesikhathi esigcwele njengamaphayona, izithunywa zevangeli, noma amalungu omkhaya waseBethel. Ngabazali abanjalo kungashiwo ngeqiniso ukuthi: “Uyise wolungileyo uyakwethaba nokwethaba, nozala ohlakaniphileyo uyathokoza ngaye. Mabathokoze uyihlo nonyoko, ethabe owakubelethayo.”—IzAga 23:24, 25.
Ubuhlungu Benhliziyo Bobuzali
4, 5. (a) Yini eyimfuneko engokomBhalo ngabadala nangezinceku ezikhonzayo abanabantwana? (b) Abanye abantwana baye baba kanjani “inhlupheko” koyise?
4 Kodwa lokhu akunjalo ngaso sonke isikhathi, ngisho nangabadala abanabantwana. Umphostoli uPawulu wabhala: “Umbonisi umelwe abe-ngongasolekiyo, indoda emfazi munye, . . . ophatha kahle indlu yakhe, abantwana bakhe bemthobela ngenhlonipho yonke—kepha uma umuntu engakwazi ukuphatha owakhe umuzi, angaliphatha kanjani ibandla likaNkulunkulu na?”—UPawulu wenezela: “Amadiyakoni mawabe-ngamadoda amfazi-munye, abusa kahle abantwana bawo nemizi yawo.”—1 Thimothewu 3:2-5, 12.
5 Yiqiniso, abadala abangamaKristu nezinceku ezikhonzayo abanakubekwa icala uma abantwana babo, benqaba ukuqhubeka bekhonza uJehova lapho sebekhulile. Kodwa banawo umthwalo wemfanelo wabantwana babo abasebancane nalabo asebebadadlana nokho abasahlala ngaphansi kophahla lwabo. Abadala nezinceku ezikhonzayo baye balahlekelwa amalungelo enkonzo ayigugu ngenxa yokuthi baye bayekelela noma bahluleka ngokungathi sína ukuhlangabezana nemfuneko engokomBhalo ‘yokubusa kahle abantwana babo nemizi yabo.’ Ngabanjalo, nangabanye abaningi, abantwana babo babalethele usizi olwengeziwe kunenjabulo. Yeka ukuthi sibe iqiniso kaningi kangakanani lesisaga: “Indodana eyisiwula iyinhlupheko kayise”!—IzAga 19:13.
Ukuba Ubaba Okunomthwalo Wemfanelo
6. Yimuphi umbuzo amadoda angamaKristu okufanele azibuze wona?
6 Wonke amadoda angamaKristu, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi anemithwalo yemfanelo yasebandleni noma cha, kufanele futhi acabangele umphumela ukunakekela abantwana abancane okungaba nawo kuyingokomoya labafazi bawo. Uma umfazi engaqinile ngokomoya, ingane, noma izingane eziningana, ziyosithinta kanjani isifundo sakhe somuntu siqu namathuba okuhlanganyela emsebenzini wokushumayela?
7. Kuye kwenzekani kwabanye abafazi abangamaKristu, futhi ngokuvamile isisusa salesisimo siyini?
7 Ingabe amadoda ayakuqaphela njalo ukuthi ukunakekela ingane noma umntwana osemncane ngokuvamile kuvimbela abafazi bawo ekuzuzeni ngokugcwele eSifundweni Sencwadi Sebandla, emihlanganweni yaseHholo LoMbuso, emihlanganweni yesifunda nasemihlanganweni yesigodi? Isimo esinjalo singaqhubeka izinyanga eziningi, futhi ngisho neminyaka, lapho kuzalwa ingane ngemva kwenye. Kungokwemvelo ukuba lomthwalo, kulendaba, uwele ikakhulukazi phezu kukamama, esikhundleni sikababa. Ngezinye izikhathi kuye kwaphawulwa ukuthi lapho amadoda athile angamaKristu ethuthuka ngokomoya, kuze kube ngisho nasephuzwini lokuba abelwe amalungelo ebandleni, abafazi bawo baba buthakathaka ngokomoya. Ngani? Ngokuvamile kungenxa yokuthi abantwana babo abasebancane bavimbela abafazi ekubeni bagxilise ukunakekela emihlanganweni, ekutadisheni iBhayibheli ngokujulile, noma ekuhlanganyeleni emsebenzini wokufakaza ngesilinganiso esikhulu. Ingabe ukuba ubaba kungabizwa ngokuthi okucatshangelwe kahle uma kuvumela ukuba kube khona izimo ezinjalo?
8. Obaba abaningi bawuhlanganyela kanjani umthwalo wokunakekela abantwana, nayiphi inzuzo kubafazi babo?
8 Ngenhlanhla, akunjalo ngaso sonke isikhathi. Obaba abaningi abangamaKristu benza konke okusemandleni abo ukuba bahlanganyele umthwalo wokunakekela abantwana. Benza ingxenye yabo egcwele ekuboneni ukuthi abantwana babo bahlala bethule phakathi nemihlangano yebandla. Uma ingane yabo iqala ukukhala, noma uma umntwana wabo ebanga umsindo, bayashintshana ngokumusa ngaphandle ukuze athole ukuyalwa okufanele. Kungani kufanele kube umama njalo olahlekelwa yizingxenye zemihlangano? Ekhaya, amadoda acabangelayo asiza abafazi bawo ngemisebenzi yasendlini nasekulaliseni abantwana ukuze indoda nomfazi bakwazi ukuhlala phansi ngokuthula bagxilise isithakazelo ezindabeni ezingokomoya.
9. Yini ebonisa ukuthi abantwana abasona isithiyo ngaso sonke isikhathi?
9 Uma izinto zihlelwe ngokufanele ebandleni, omama abasebasha abanezingane bangahlanganyela enkonzweni yobuphayona obusizayo. Abanye futhi bangamaphayona avamile. Ngakho abantwana abasona isithiyo ngaso sonke isikhathi. Abazali abaningi abangamaKristu babonisa umoya omuhle wobuphayona.
Abanabo Abantwana Kodwa Bayajabula
10. Yini eye yanqunywa eminye imibhangqwana eshadile, futhi iye yabusiswa kanjani?
10 Eminye imibhangqwana esemisha iye yanquma ukuhlala ingenabantwana. Nakuba abafazi babenemizwelo enamandla yokuba omama njengeyabanye abesifazane, baye banquma ngokuvumelana namadoda abo, ukuba bagweme ukuba nabantwana ukuze bazinikele ekukhonzeni uJehova isikhathi esigcwele. Eminingi yayo iye yakhonza njengamaphayona noma izithunywa zevangeli. Manje ingabheka emuva eminyakeni edlule ngokubonga. Eqinisweni, ayizange ibe nabantwana abangokwenyama. Kodwa iye yaveza abafundi abasha abaye baqhubeka ngokwethembeka bekhulekela uJehova. ‘Labantwana ngesiminya ekukholweni’ abasoze bakhohlwa ukuthi ubani owasiza ekubaletheleni “izwi leqiniso.”—1 Thimothewu 1:2; Efesu 1:13; qhathanisa neyoku-1 Korinte 4:14, 17; 1 Johane 2:1.
11. (a) Imibhangqwana eminingi engenabantwana ikhonza uJehova kuziphi izingxenye, futhi kungani ingazisoli? (b) Yimuphi umbhalo ongasetshenziswa kuyo yonke imibhangqwana eye yahlala ingenabantwana “ngenxa yoMbuso”?
11 Imibhangqwana eminingi eshadile emhlabeni wonke eye yadela izinjabulo zobuzali iye yakwazi ukukhonza uJehova emsebenzini wokuhambela izifunda, izigodi, noma waseBethel. Lena nayo ngokufanayo ibheka emuva ngokwaneliseka eminyakeni yokuphila kwayo eye yayisebenzisa ikhonza uJehova nabazalwane bayo kulamalungelo akhethekile. Ayizisoli. Nakuba ingazange ibe nenjabulo yokuletha abantwana emhlabeni, iye yafeza ingxenye ebalulekile ekuqhubekiseni izithakazelo zoMbuso emikhakheni yayo ehlukahlukene yomsebenzi. Ngokuqinisekile usebenza kuyo yonke lemibhangqwana eye yahlala ingenabantwana “ngenxa yombuso wezulu,” umbhalo othi: “Ngokuba uNkulunkulu kasiye ongalungile ukuba akhohlwe umsebenzi wenu nothando enalubonakalisa ngakulo igama lakhe, lokhu nibakhonzile abangcwele, nisabakhonza.”—Mathewu 19:12; Heberu 6:10.
Indaba Yomuntu Siqu
12. (a) Kungani ukuzala abantwana kuyilungelo eliyingqayizivele? (b) Kuphakathi naziphi izikhathi lapho ukuzala abantwana kwakuyisabelo esivela kuNkulunkulu?
12 Njengoba sibonile ekuqaleni kwalengxoxo, ukuzala abantwana kuyisipho esivela kuNkulunkulu. (IHubo 127:3) Kuyilungelo eliyingqayizivele izidalwa zomoya zikaJehova ezingahlanganyeli kulo. (Mathewu 22:30) Kuye kwaba nezikhathi lapho ukuzala abantwana kwakuyingxenye yomsebenzi uJehova awabele izinceku zakhe emhlabeni. Lokhu kwakusendabeni ka-Adamu noEva. (Genesise 1:28) Kwakungokufanayo nangabasinda kuZamcolo. (Genesise 9:1) Kwakuyinjongo kaJehova ukuba abantwana bakwaIsrayeli bande ngenani ngokuzala.—Genesise 46:1-3; Eksodusi 1:7, 20; Duteronomi 1:10.
13, 14. (a) Kungathiwani ngokuzala abantwana namuhla, futhi yikuphi ukugxeka okungaba okungafanele? (b) Nakuba ukuzala abantwana ngalesikhathi sokugcina kuyindaba yomuntu siqu, yisiphi iseluleko esinikezwayo?
13 Namuhla, ukuzala abantwana akuyona ngokuqondile ingxenye yomsebenzi uJehova awuphathise abantu bakhe. Nokho, kuseyilungelo alinikeza abantu abashadile uma belifisa. Ngakho-ke, imibhangqwana engamaKristu enquma ukuqalisa umkhaya akufanele igxekwe; ngokufanayo nemibhangqwana egwema ukuba nabantwana.
14 Ngakho indaba yokuzala abantwana ngalesikhathi sokuphela ingeyomuntu siqu umbhangqwana ngamunye okumelwe uzinqumele ngokwawo. Nokho, njengoba “isikhathi sesinciphile,” imibhangqwana eshadile iyoba yenza kahle ukucabangela ngokunakekela nangomthandazo ubuhle nobubi bokuzala abantwana kulezikhathi. (1 Korinte 7:29) Leyo ekhetha ukuba nabantwana kufanele iqaphele ngokugcwele hhayi nje kuphela izinjabulo ukuzala umntwana okungaziletha kodwa futhi nemithwalo yemfanelo ehilelekile nezinkinga ezingayivelela yona nabantwana ebaletha emhlabeni.
Uma Engahlelelwe
15, 16. (a) Yisiphi isimo okufanele sigwenywe lapho kwenzeka ukukhulelwa okungazelelwe, futhi ngani? (b) Noma yimuphi umntwana kufanele abhekwe kanjani, kuhilela miphi imithwalo yemfanelo?
15 Abanye bangase bathi: ‘Lokho kulungile, kodwa kuthiwani uma umntwana efika kungazelelwe?’ Lokhu kuye kwenzeka emibhangqwaneni eminingi eyayiliqaphela ngokugcwele iqiniso lokuthi lesi akusona isikhathi esihle sokuletha abantwana emhlabeni. Eminye yayo ibisenkonzweni yesikhathi esigcwele iminyaka eminingi. Kufanele ikubheke kanjani ukufika kwalomuntu omusha ongalindelwe?
16 Lapha yilapho ukuba umzali okucatshangelwe kahle kungenela khona. Yiqiniso, ukukhulelwa kungaba okungalindelwe, kodwa abazali abangamaKristu abanakubheka ingane ezalwayo njengengafunwa. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi yiziphi izinguquko ukufika kwayo okungaziletha ekuphileni kwabo, ngokuqinisekile akufanele bazizwe beyithukuthelele. Kakade, yibo abanomthwalo wemfanelo ngokukhulelwa kwayo. Manje, njengoba isikhona, kufanele bamukele isimo sabo esishintshile, bazi ukuthi, ngezindlela ezihlukahlukene bonke abantu “bahlangabezana nesikhathi nethuba.” (UmShumayeli 9:11) Bethanda noma bengathandi, baye baba nengxenye esenzweni sokudlulisela ukuphila uJehova uNkulunkulu anguMsunguli waso. Kufanele bamukele umntwana wabo njengempahla engcwele abayiphathisiwe futhi ngothando bathathe umthwalo wabo wemfanelo ‘njengabazali eNkosini.’—Efesu 6:1.
“Kwenzeni Konke Egameni LeNkosi”
17. Yisiphi iseluleko umphostoli uPawulu asinika abaseKolose, futhi leseluleko singalandelwa kanjani namuhla?
17 Ngaphambi nje kokuba anikeze isiyalo ngezindaba zomkhaya umphostoli uPawulu wabhala: “Konke enikwenzayo, noma kungezwi noma kungomsebenzi, kwenzeni konke egameni leNkosi uJesu, nimbonge uNkulunkulu uYise ngaye.” (Kolose 3:17-21) Kunoma yisiphi isimo umKristu angazithola ekuso, kufanele ambonge uJehova futhi asebenzise isimo sakhe ukuba ‘enze konke egameni leNkosi.’
18, 19. (a) AmaKristu angashadile nemibhangqwana engenabantwana ‘bangakwenza’ kanjani “konke egameni leNkosi”? (b) Abazali abangamaKristu kufanele bababheke kanjani abantwana babo, futhi yimuphi umgomo okufanele bazibekele wona?
18 UmKristu oye wakhetha ukuhlala engashadile ngeke asebenzise inkululeko yakhe ekuzitikeni komuntu siqu, kodwa ekusebenzeni “ngenhliziyo kungathi kwenzelwa iNkosi,” uma kunokwenzeka ohlotsheni oluthile lwenkonzo yesikhathi esigcwele. (Kolose 3:23; 1 Korinte 7:32) Ngokufanayo, umbhangqwana oshadile onquma ukungabi nabantwana ngeke ‘usebenzise lelizwe’ ngobugovu kodwa uyonikeza inkonzo yoMbuso indawo enkulu ngangokunokwenzeka ekuphileni kwawo.—1 Korinte 7:29-31.
19 NgamaKristu anabantwana, kufanele amukele ukuba kwawo abazali ngendlela ecatshangelwe kahle. Esikhundleni sokubheka abantwana bawo njengesiphazamiso ekukhonzeni uJehova, kufanele ababheke njengesabelo esikhethekile. Lokhu kuyohlanganisani? Nokho, uma umKristu ozinikezele ehlangana nothile obonisa isithakazelo eqinisweni, uqalisa isifundo seBhayibheli sasekhaya sasikhathi sonke nalowomuntu. Eseqalise lesifundo, uFakazi uyakhuthala, ephindela njalo masonto onke ukuze asize othakazelayo ukuba athuthuke ngokomoya. Akudingeki okungaphansi kwalokho endabeni yabantwana bomKristu. Isifundo seBhayibheli sasikhathi sonke, esicatshangelwe kahle, esiqalwe ngokushesha ngangokunokwenzeka futhi esiqhutshwa njalo, siyadingeka ukuze sisize umntwana ukuba akhule ngokomoya futhi afunde ukuthanda uMdali wakhe. (2 Thimothewu 3:14, 15) Ngaphezu kwalokho, abazali bayonakekela ukuba babeke isibonelo esihle sokuziphatha kobuKristu ekhaya, njengoba nje benza eHholo LoMbuso. Futhi lapho kunokwenzeka bayothatha umthwalo wemfanelo wokuqeqesha abantwana babo enkonzweni yasensimini. Ngalendlela, ngaphezu kokushumayela abanye abantu abadala, abazali bayofuna ‘ukwenza’ abantwana babo siqu “abafundi” ngosizo lukaJehova.—Mathewu 28:19.
Abantwana Phakathi ‘Nosizi Olukhulu’
20. (a) Yini engaphambi kwethu, futhi uJesu waxwayisa ngabuphi ubunzima? (b) Amazwi kaJesu ahlobene kanjani nokukhulisa abantwana esikhathini sesiphelo?
20 Ngaphambi kwethu ‘kunosizi olukhulu olungazange lube khona kwasekuqaleni kwezwe kuze kube manje, nolungasayikuba-khona.’ (Mathewu 24:21) Kuyoba isikhathi esinzima kwabadala nakubantwana ngokufanayo. Esiprofethweni sakhe esimayelana nesiphelo salesimiso sezinto samanje, uJesu wabikezela ukuthi iqiniso lobuKristu laliyohlukanisa imikhaya. Wathi: “Khona umuntu uyakukhaphela umfowabo ekufeni noyise umntanakhe, yebo, abantwana bayakuvukela abazali babo, bababulale.” (Marku 13:12) Ngokusobala, ukukhulisa abantwana esikhathini sokuphela kwakungeke kube injabulo emsulwa njalo. Kungaletha ukudabuka kwenhliziyo, ukudumazeka, futhi ngisho nengozi, njengoba amazwi kaJesu acashunwe ngenhla ebonisa.
21. (a) Nakuba becabangela ikusasa ngendlela engokoqobo, kungani abazali kungafanele bakhathazeke ngokungafanele? (b) Yini engaba ithemba labo nelabantwana babo?
21 Kodwa nakuba becabangela ubunzima obungaphambili ngendlela engokoqobo, labo abanabantwana abasebancane akufanele bakhathazeke ngokungafanele ngekusasa. Uma bona ngokwabo behlala bethembekile futhi benza konke okusemandleni abo ukuba bakhulise abantwana babo “ngokuyala nangokuqondisa kweNkosi,” bangaqiniseka ukuthi abantwana babo abalalelayo bayocatshangelwa ngomusa. (Efesu 6:4; qhathanisa neyoku-1 Korinte 7:14.) Njengengxenye ‘yesixuku esikhulu,’ bona nabantwana babo bangaba nethemba lokusinda ‘osizini olukhulu.’ Uma abantwana abanjalo bekhulela ekubeni izinceku ezithembekile zikaJehova, bayombonga phakade ngokuthi baba nabazali abanomthwalo wemfanelo.—IsAmbulo 7:9, 14; IzAga 4:1, 3, 10.
Imibuzo Yokubukeza
◻ Yisiphi isimiso sesikhathi eside ukuzalwa komntwana okusihilelayo?
◻ Kungani abadala abathile nezinceku ezikhonzayo beye balahlekelwa amalungelo abo?
◻ Yiziphi izici indoda engumKristu okufanele izicabangele mayelana nokukhulelwa komfazi wayo?
◻ Yini ebonisa ukuthi umbhangqwana ongamaKristu ungaba ongenabantwana futhi ujabule?
◻ Abazali kumelwe bakubheke kanjani ukuzalwa komntwana, futhi kungani singekho isidingo sokuba bakhathazeke ngokungafanele ngekusasa?
[Isithombe ekhasini 24]
Obaba bangahlanganyela umthwalo wemfanelo wokugcina abantwana bethule phakathi nemihlangano