Intsha Iyabuza . . .
Ngingayikhetha Kanjani Ibhayisikobho Ekahle?
UMDLALI wamabhayisikobho ongumakad’ ebona wamuva nje wacashunwa ethi: “Abantu . . .bangibuza ukuthi kungani ngingasayi manje emabhayisikobho. Kunamabhayisikobho amaningi kabi onakalisayo.” Wakhetha ukukususa ngokuphelele ukuya ebhayisikobho njengomthombo wokuzijabulisa.
Intombazane eyeve eminyakeni eyishumi nambili okuthiwa uDenise icabanga ngendlela efanayo, kodwa isikisela ikhambi elithi alibe ngaphansi kwalokho ngokushuba. Iyachaza, “Ngokuvamile akukuningi okokukubuka, ngoba ngokuvamile kuwubudlova. Ngakho ngikukhetha kakhulu engikubukayo.”
Akungabazeki ukuthi nawe uyayijabulela ibhayisikobho ngezikhathi ezithile. Ngakho-ke kuyaqondakala uma unganqumi ukukuyeka ngokuphelele ukubuka ibhayisikobho njengendlela yokuzilibazisa. Kodwa njengoba kuboniswe ezihlokweni zethu ezingaphambili—futhi ukuthi nhlá emakhasini ezikaqed’ isizungu anoma iliphi iphephandaba kuzokuqinisekisa lokhu—kunamabhayisikobho amahle ambalwa akhiqizwa namuhla afanelekayo ukuba osemusha ongumKristu angawabuka.a Lena akuyona indaba okumelwe ithathwe kalula, ngoba amabhayisikobho owabukelayo awumfanekiso wezimiso zokuziphatha ozazisayo. Akhuluma okuningi ngohlobo lwabangane oluthandayo, uhlobo lolimi olubekezelelayo, ukuziphatha ngokobulili okusekelayo.
IBhayibheli lisinxusa ukuba ‘sizonde okubi.’ (IHubo 97:10) Ingabe ngempela ungenza kanjalo uma njalo uthungatha ukubona igazi lobusathane, ukunqunywa kwabantu, nobudlova, noma ukuboniswa kobulili okushukumisa ingqondo? Akunakwenzeka. Intsha ezazisa ngempela izimiso zokwesaba uNkulunkulu ifuna ukulandela iseluleko seBhayibheli esikwabaseFilipi 4:8: “Elokugcina, bazalwane, konke okuyiqiniso, konke okuhloniphekayo, konke okulungileyo, konke okumhlophe, konke okuthandekayo, konke okutusekayo, noma kukhona okuhle, noma kukhona okubongekayo, zindlani ngalokho.” Lokhu akusho ngempela ukuthi kumelwe uyeke wonke amabhayisikobho, kodwa kusho ukuthi kumelwe ukukhethe kakhulu okubukelayo. Ungakwenza kanjani lokhu?
Isilinganiso Ebekwa Kuso—Isiqondiso Esingenaphutha?
EUnited States, amabhayisikobho abekwa esilinganisweni ngokwezindinganiso ezibekwe iNhlangano YaseMelika Yezithombe Ezishukumayo. Uhlamvu lwegama lubonisa ukuthi ibhayisikobho ibhekwa njengekufanelekele yini ukubukwa yibo bonke abantu bomphakathi, ukuthi kusikiselwa isiqondiso sabazali, noma kumelwe ibekelwe imingcele yokuba ibukwe abadala kuphela. Indlela ibhayisikobho ekhuluma ngayo ngobulili nobudlova, utshwala nokusetshenziswa kabi kwezidakamizwa, inhlamba, nokufanayo, ngokuvamile iyisisekelo sokunquma isilinganiso okumelwe ibekwe kuso.
Nakuba izimiso ezinjalo zokubeka esilinganisweni kuvunywa ukuthi zinephutha, futhi ngokuvamile ziyashintshashintsha, ziyamnika ofuna ukubukela okungenani umqondo othile ngalokho ibhayisikobho ekuqukethe nokuthi ikufanelekele yini ukubukwa noma cha. Uma isimiso esifanayo sikhona ezweni lakini, ngokungangabazeki uyosithola siwusizo. Abazali bakho ngokufanayo bangase basebenzise izilinganiso ekubekeni iziqondiso ngokuphathelene nokuthi yimaphi amabhayisikobho ongase uwabukele.
Nokho, izilinganiso zamabhayisikobho zingase zikhohlise. Khumbula: Labo abanquma amazinga bangase bangazisebenzisi izimiso ezisekelwe eBhayibhelini. Futhi njengoba izindinganiso zezwe zokuziphatha ziwohloka, amabhayisikobho amaningi abengase abhekwe njengashaqisayo eminyakeni emibalwa edlule manje abhekwa njengamukelekela ukubukwa izibukeli zonke.
UDeMarlo osemusha wakuthola lokhu lapho eya ebhayisikobho ayecabanga ukuthi ibekwe esilinganisweni esamukelekayo. Kamuva yabonakala ukuthi yayigcwele “inhlamba nobudlova.” Ngakho nakuba izilinganiso ezikhishwe emaphepheni zingase zibe usizo, akumelwe zibe wukuphela kwesisekelo sokunquma lokho ongakubuka. IBhayibheli liyaxwayisa: “Ongenalwazi uyakholwa amazwi onke, kepha oqondileyo uyaqaphela ukunyathela kwakhe.”—IzAga 14:15.
Ukuhlola Ibhayisikobho
Iziphi ezinye iziqondiso ongazisebenzisa? Ukubuyekezwa nokumenyezelwa kwamabhayisikobho nakho kungakunikeza umqondo othile ngokuqukethwe ibhayisikobho. Kodwa futhi, ukuqapha kuyadingeka. Ukubukezwa kwebhayisikobho kumane nje kuveze umbono womunye umuntu. Futhi isimemezelo singalifihla ngamabomu iqiniso lokuthi ibhayisikobho inezigcawu ezingathandeki.
UConnie oweve eminyakeni eyishumi nambili uthi: “Ngiye ngathola ukuthi ukwazi ukuthi obani abadlali abasemqoka abadlala ebhayisikobho ngokuvamile kukunika umqondo othile ngalokho okungenzeka ibhayisikobho ikuveze.” Ontanga yakho abangamaKristu abanezindinganiso ezisekelwe eBhayibhelini ezifana nezakho bangase bazi uma ibhayisikobho ethile yamukeleka. Futhi imenenja yasebhayisikobho noma umuntu odayisa amathikithi ngokufanayo banganikeza ukwaziswa okuqotho. Nokho, ngokuvamile abantu bathambekele ekukutsheleni lokho abakujabulele ngempela ngebhayisikobho. Kungani ungababuzi ukuthi yini embi ngayo? Ungagwegwesi. Buza ukuthi zikhona yini izigcawu ezinobudlova bokuchitha igazi, ubulili obusobala, noma ukuhlaselwa amademoni.
Abazali bakho nabo bangaba umthombo omuhle weseluleko. UVanessa osemusha uthi: “Ngibuza abazali bami. Uma becabanga ukuthi kulungile ngami ukuba ngiyibuke, ngiyaya ngiyoyibuka.”
Kuyoba okufanayo nangokuqasha amakhasethi evideo. Ngaphezu kwalokho, hlola ibhokisi noma isembozo ngokunakekela. Ingabe kukhona okuthile ngemifanekiso namazwi okungasikisela ukuthi ibhayisikobho ayamukeleki? Khona-ke yibuyisele emuva! Kungase kusize futhi ukukhuluma nomabhalane wasesitolo oseyibonile kakade ibhayisikobho. IzAga 14:16 zithi: “Indoda ehlakaniphile iyaqapha futhi iphenduke ebubini; isiwula asiqapheli futhi siwela khona ngekhanda.”—The Jerusalem Bible.
Ukuphuma, Ukuyicisha
Nokho, kuthiwani uma usuliqashile kakade ikhasethi levideo, futhi uthola ukuthi ekuvezayo akukuhle? Ikhambi lilula: Yicishe! Lokhu kungase kungabi lula. Ungase uzithole uhileleke ngokomzwelo kokwenzekayo nakubadlali. Ungase ufune kakhulu ukwazi ukuthi ibhayisikobho izophetha kanjani. Kodwa ukubalekela kwakho ububi ngokucacile kuyinto enhle ukuba uyenze.—Qhathanisa noMathewu 5:29, 30.
Isimo singase sibe esithinta kakhudlwana uma usebhayisikobho nabangane futhi ibhayisikobho iba engathandeki. Osemusha onguJoseph wabhekana naso kanye lesimo. Izimemezelo zokukhangisa ngebhayisikobho yamuva zayiveza “njengefanele nakanjani ukubukwa.” Nokho, uJoseph uyakhumbula: “Phakathi nemizuzu yokuqala emihlanu kwakunezigcawu ezintathu zobudlova nobunqunu.” Ngomoya opholile uJoseph watshela abangane bakhe ngayehlose ukukwenza futhi waphuma. Ingabe wathola lokhu kubanga amahloni? UJoseph uthi: “Cha, lutho neze. Ngacabanga ngoJehova kuqala nangokuthokozisa yena.”
Kuyavunywa, ukucindezela kontanga ngokumelene nokuthatha ukuma okunjalo kungase kube kukhulu. Ukucindezela kungase kuvele ngisho nasentsheni ekhuliswe abazali abangamaKristu, kodwa intsha enjalo onembeza bayo baye balinyazwa ukubuka amabhayisikobho amaningi angabazisayo. (1 Timothewu 4:2) Ingase ikusole ngokuba ongalinganiseli nolungé ngokweqile. Kodwa kunokuvumela ukucindezela kontanga, ‘yiba nonembeza omuhle.’ (1 Petru 3:16) Okubaluleke ngempela akukhona lokho ontanga yakho abakucabangayo ngawe kodwa yilokho uJehova akucabangayo ngawe! Futhi uma abangane bakho bekukhathaza ngenxa yokulandela unembeza wakho, sekuyisikhathi sokuba uthole abanye abangane abasha. (IzAga 13:20) Ungumlondi wokugcina wamehlo akho, izindlebe, nenhliziyo engokomfanekiso.—Qhathanisa noJobe 12:11; 31:1; IzAga 4:23.
Ukugcina Unembeza Omuhle
UGeorgia osemusha wayenomkhuba wokunyenya angene emabhayisikobho ayenqatshelwe eqenjini lontanga yakhe. Nokho, njengoba isikhathi sihamba, waqala ukufisa ukuba nobuhlobo obuhle noNkulunkulu. Wayeka ukubuka amabhayisikobho asolekayo futhi wathola ezinye izinto ezijabulisayo zokuzenza nabangane bakhe abangamaKristu. UGeorgia uthi: “Angisenalutho olusinda unembeza wami. Futhi manje buyehla ubuthongo ngoba nginomuzwa ohlanzeke ngempela ngaphakathi.”
Ingabe uyafuna ukuba ohlanzekile emehlweni oMhloli wezinhliziyo, uJehova uNkulunkulu? (IzAga 17:3) Khona-ke qaphela lokho okufaka enhliziyweni yakho. Kugweme ukuzivulela ngokungadingekile ebudloveni obungadingekile, ukonakaliswa ngokobulili, noma olimini olungcolile; lokhu kungathuntubeza izinzwa zakho ngalokho okulungile futhi konakalise inhliziyo yakho. Yiba njengomhubi owathandaza: “Phendula amehlo ami, angaboni okuyize.”—IHubo 119:37.
Ngokuba oqaphile nokhethayo, ngeke nje uzivikele emathonyeni amabi kuphela kodwa uyojabulela ‘lowomuzwa wenhlanzeko’ uGeorgia osemusha akhuluma ngawo. Futhi akukho mathonya akhethekile aseHollywood angalingana nalowo muzwa!
[Umbhalo waphansi]
a Bheka isihloko esithi “Ingabe Kunendaba Ukuthi Imaphi Amabhayisikobho Engiwabukelayo?” esikumagazini wePhaphama kaJuly 22, 1990.
[Amazwi acashunwe esihlokweni ekhasini 11]
Amabhayisikobho amaningi ayeshaqisa eminyakeni emibalwa edlule manje asebhekwa njengamuke-lekayo
[Isithombe ekhasini 10]
Abazali bakho bangase bazi uma ibhayisikobho emenyezelwe ingatuseki