Umbono WeBhayibheli
Ukuzithoba Komfazi—Kusho Ukuthini?
IZWI LIKANKULUNKULU, iBhayibheli, lithi kweyabase-Efesu 5:22: “Abafazi mabazithobe kubayeni babo njengokungathi bazithoba eNkosini.” Empeleni kusho ukuthini lokhu? Ingabe umfazi kumelwe azithobe kuyo yonke into efunwa umyeni wakhe, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi iyini? Ingabe akanakuthatha isinyathelo kuqala noma abe nemibono ehlukile kweyomyeni wakhe?
Cabangela ukulandisa kweBhayibheli ngo-Abigayili. Wenza ngokuhlakanipha kodwa ngokuphambene nezifiso zomyeni wakhe ocebile, uNabali. Naphezu komusa uNabali awuboniswa izinceku zikaDavide, owayekhethwe uNkulunkulu ukuba abe inkosi yakwa-Israyeli, uNabali ‘wabathukuthelela.’ UDavide, ethukutheliswe ukungabongi kukaNabali, wayefuna ukumyisa kwagoqanyawo. U-Abigayili waqaphela ukuthi wonke umkhaya wakhe wawusengozini. Wathambisa inhliziyo kaDavide. Kanjani?—1 Samuweli 25:2-35.
U-Abigayili wavuma kuDavide ukuthi uNabali ‘wayengumuntu omubi’ futhi wanikeza uDavide impahla ayeyigodlile uNabali. Ngokuvamile, akulungile ukuba indoda noma umfazi aveze obala amaphutha omngane wakhe womshado. Ingabe u-Abigayili wayeyisihlubuki ngokukhuluma nangokwenza ngalendlela? Cha. Wayezama ukusindisa ukuphila kukaNabali nomkhaya wakhe. Akukho okubonisa ukuthi kwakuwumkhuba wakhe ukungahloniphi noma ukuzibusa. Futhi noNabali ongagculiseki wayengakaze azwakalise ukunganeliseki ngendlela umkakhe ayesiza ngayo ekusingatheni ifa lakhe elikhulu. Kodwa kulesi simo esibucayi, ukuhlakanipha kwashukumisela umkakhe ukuba athathe isinyathelo kuqala. Ngaphezu kwalokho, iBhayibheli liyakutusa lokho u-Abigayili akwenza.—1 Samuweli 25:3, 25, 32, 33.
Esikhathini eside ngaphambi kokuba khona kuka-Abigayili, kwakunezikhathi lapho abafazi bezinzalamizi babezwakalisa khona imibono yabo futhi bathathe izinyathelo ezihlukile kulokho okwakufunwa abayeni babo. Nokho, laba ‘besifazane abangcwele ababethembela kuNkulunkulu’ baqokonyiswa njengezibonelo zokuzithoba zomfazi ongumKristu. (1 Petru 3:1-6) Ngokwesibonelo, lapho uSara eba nomuzwa wokuthi indodana ka-Abrahama u-Ishmayeli yayisiwusongo endodaneni yabo, u-Isaka, wanquma ukuthi u-Ishmayeli kufanele axoshwe. Lokhu ‘kwakukubi kakhulu emehlweni ka-Abrahama.’ Kodwa uNkulunkulu wathi ku-Abrahama: “Akungabi-lukhuni emehlweni akho ngenxa yomfana . . . konke uSara akusho kuwe, lalela izwi lakhe.”—Genesise 21:11, 12.
Kudingeka Ukuqonda
Khona-ke, kungaba okungalungile ukuba umfazi azizwe ecindezelekile ukuba enze lokho aziyo ukuthi akuhlakaniphile noma kwephula izimiso zokuhlonipha uNkulunkulu ngoba nje ethi uyazithoba. Futhi akufanele enziwe azizwe enecala ngenxa yokuthatha isinyathelo kuqala endabeni ethile ebalulekile, njengoba kwenza u-Abigayili noSara.
Ukuzithoba komfazi akusho ukuthi ngaso sonke isikhathi umfazi kumelwe avumelane nayo yonke into efiswa umyeni wakhe. Yini eyenza umehluko? Lapho kuhileleke izimiso ezilungile, kungase kudingeke angavumelani nomyeni wakhe. Noma kunjalo, kusafanele abonise umoya wokuzithoba kokuhlonipha uNkulunkulu.
Yiqiniso, umfazi kufanele aqaphele ukuthi akazishayi indiva ngamabomu izifiso zomyeni, ukuziphindiselela, noma ngenxa yezinye izisusa ezimbi. Kumelwe abe nokuqonda, ‘ahlakaniphe,’ njengo-Abigayili.—1 Samuweli 25:3.
Lapho Indoda Ibalekela Umthwalo Wemfanelo
Umgomo oyinhloko nesisusa sokuzithoba komfazi kokuhlonipha uNkulunkulu ukujabulisa uJehova ngokubambisana nomyeni wakhe nokusekela izinqumo zakhe. Lokhu kulula kakhulu uma indoda ivuthiwe ngokomoya. Kungaba inselele uma ingavuthiwe.
Uma ingavuthiwe, umfazi angabhekana kanjani nalesi simo? Angase ayinxuse ngenkuthalo noma asikisele ukuthi yiziphi izinqumo ezizozuzisa umkhaya kakhulu. Uma eyivumela ‘iqondise umkhumbi,’ ingase ibe nekhono ngokwengeziwe. Ukubelesela umyeni wakhe ngokuqhubekayo kwaphula umoya ofanele wokuzithoba. (IzAga 21:19) Nokho, uma inhlalakahle yomkhaya isengozini ngokusobala ngenxa yenkambiso yendoda, umfazi angase akhethe ukusikisela indlela elungile, njengoba kwenza uSara.
Uma indoda ingakholwa, inselele kumfazi iba nkulu nakakhulu. Noma kunjalo, kufanele azithobe uma nje indoda ingafuni ukuba aphule imithetho yeBhayibheli. Uma yenza kanjalo, ukusabela komfazi ongumKristu kufanele kube njengokwabafundi lapho inkantolo ifuna ukuba baphule imiyalo kaNkulunkulu: “Kumelwe silalele uNkulunkulu njengombusi kunabantu.”—IzEnzo 5:29.
Nokho, ngenxa yokuntuleka kokuhlangenwe nakho nokuhlakanipha okulinganiselwe, ngisho namadoda nabafazi abanezisusa ezinhle bangazishaya indiva izindima zabo. Indoda ingase intule ukucabangela; umfazi angase aphikelele efuna izinto azithandayo. Yini eyosiza? Ukuzithoba kubalulekile kubo bobabili, njengoba “sonke siyakhubeka izikhathi eziningi.”—Jakobe 3:2.
Amadoda amaningi ayokwazisa ukuthatha isinyathelo kuqala ngobuqotho kwabafazi bawo uma bekwenza ngokuhlakanipha. Futhi ukubambisana kuyathuthuka uma bobabili bexolisa lapho benza amaphutha. Njengoba uJehova esithethelela ukushiyeka kwethu kwansuku zonke, nathi kufanele sithethelele abanye. “Uma wena-Jehova uqaphela iziphambeko, Nkosi, ngubani ongema na? Kepha ukuthethelela kukuwe.”—IHubo 130:3, 4.
“Zithobeni Komunye Nomunye”
Khona-ke, ngenxa yenzuzo yethu, imiBhalo iyaluleka: “Zithobeni komunye nomunye ngokwesaba uKristu.” Hloniphanani ngothando; ningathiyani noma nincintisane. Lombhalo uyaqhubeka: “Abafazi mabazithobe kubayeni babo njengokungathi bazithoba eNkosini, ngoba indoda iyinhloko yomkayo njengoba noKristu eyinhloko yebandla.”—Efesu 5:21-23.
Igama lesiGreki elasetshenziswa uPawulu kweyabase-Efesu 5:21, 22 libonisa ukuzithoba komuntu, hhayi ukuphoqelelwa ukuba azithobe. Futhi ukuzithoba kwenzelwa iNkosi, hhayi nje ukuze kube nokuthula emshadweni. Ibandla likaKristu labagcotshiwe lizithoba kuye ngokuzithandela nangenjabulo. Lapho umfazi enza okufanayo kumyeni wakhe, khona-ke ngokunokwenzeka umshado uyoba ojabulisayo nophumelelayo.
ImiBhalo futhi ithi: ‘Yileyo naleyo ndoda mayithande umkayo njengoba izithanda yona,’ ngokungagodli. (Efesu 5:33; 1 Petru 3:7) Indoda kufanele ikhumbule ukuthi nayo kufanele izithobe enhlokweni yayo, ngoba iBhayibheli lithi: “Inhloko yawo wonke amadoda uKristu.” Yebo, indoda kufanele izithobe ezimfundisweni zikaKristu. UKristu naye uyazithoba enhlokweni yakhe: ‘Inhloko kaKristu uNkulunkulu.’ Ngakho, wonke umuntu unenhloko, ngaphandle kukaJehova. Futhi uze azibophe ngemithetho yakhe siqu.—1 Korinte 11:3; Thithu 1:2; Heberu 6:18.
Ukuzithoba kobuKristu kuyalinganisela futhi kuzuzisa bobabili owesilisa nowesifazane. Kubangela ukuba umshado ube nokuthula nokwaneliseka okungalethwa kuphela uMdali wethu onothando.—Filipi 4:7.
[Umthombo Wesithombe ekhasini 14]
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