Ukuba Ubaba Nomdala—Ukuzifeza Zombili Izindima

“Ngempela uma noma ubani engazi ukuthi angayengamela kanjani indlu yakhe siqu, angalinakekela kanjani ibandla likaNkulunkulu?”—1 THIMOTHEWU 3:5.

1, 2. (a) Ekhulwini lokuqala, ababonisi abangashadile nabashadile abangenazingane babekwazi kanjani ukukhonza abafowabo? (b) U-Akwila noPrisila bayisibonelo ngayiphi indlela kubantu abaningi abashadile namuhla?

ABABONISI ebandleni lobuKristu lokuqala babengaba amadoda angashadile noma ashadile angenazingane, noma amadoda omkhaya anezingane. Ngokungangabazeki amanye alawo maKristu akwazi ukulandela iseluleko somphostoli uPawulu esinikezwe encwadini yakhe yokuqala kwabaseKorinte, isahluko 7, futhi ahlala engashadile. UJesu wayethé: “Kukhona abathenwa abaye bazenza abathenwa ngenxa yombuso wamazulu.” (Mathewu 19:12) Amadoda anjalo angashadile, njengoPawulu mhlawumbe nabanye ayejikeleza nabo, ayekhululekile ukuba ajikeleze esiza abafowabo.

² IBhayibheli alisho noma uBarnaba, uMarku, uSila, uLuka, uThimothewu, noThithu babengashadile yini. Uma babeshadile, ngokusobala babekhululeke ngokwanele emithwalweni yemfanelo yomkhaya ukuze bakwazi ukuya ezindaweni ezikude ezabelweni ezihlukahlukene. (IzEnzo 13:2; 15:39-41; 2 Korinte 8:16, 17; 2 Thimothewu 4:9-11; Thithu 1:5) Kungenzeka babehamba nomkabo, njengoPetru nabo ‘bonke abanye abaphostoli,’ ngokusobala abahamba nomkabo lapho beya ezindaweni ezihlukahlukene. (1 Korinte 9:5) U-Akwila noPrisila bayisibonelo sabantu abashadile ababezimisele ukuthuthela kwezinye izindawo, belandela uPawulu besuka eKorinte beya e-Efesu, bese belibangisa eRoma, baphinde babuyele e-Efesu. IBhayibheli alisho noma babenezingane yini. Inkonzo yabo yokuzinikela ngenxa yabafowabo yabenza babongwa yiwo “wonke amabandla ezizwe.” (Roma 16:3-5; IzEnzo 18:2, 18; 2 Thimothewu 4:19) Namuhla, akungabazeki ukuthi kunemibhangqwana eminingi eshadile, njengo-Akwila noPrisila, engakhonza amanye amabandla, mhlawumbe ngokuthuthela lapho kunesidingo esikhudlwana khona.

Ubaba Nomdala

 3. Yini esikisela ukuthi abadala abaningi bekhulu lokuqala babengamadoda ashadile anemikhaya?

³ Kubonakala sengathi ekhulwini lokuqala C.E., iningi labadala abangamaKristu lalingamadoda ashadile anezingane. Lapho uPawulu ebeka izimfanelo ezidingekayo endodeni “ezama ukufinyelela isikhundla sombonisi,” wathi umKristu onjalo kufanele abe “umuntu owengamela indlu yakhe siqu ngendlela enhle, onabantwana abazithoba ngokungathi sína ngokuphelele.”—1 Thimothewu 3:1, 4.

 4. Kwakudingekani kubadala abashadile abanezingane?

⁴ Njengoba sibonile, umbonisi wayengabophekile ukuba abe nezingane, noma ngisho nokuba ashade. Kodwa uma eshadile, ukuze afaneleke njengomdala noma inceku ekhonzayo, umKristu kwakudingeka asebenzise ubunhloko ngendlela efanele nangothando phezu komkakhe futhi azibonakalise ekwazi ukugcina izingane zakhe zizithoba ngendlela efanele. (1 Korinte 11:3; 1 Thimothewu 3:12, 13) Noma yibuphi ubuthakathaka obungathi sína ekuphatheni umkhaya wakhe babungenza umzalwane angawafanelekeli amalungelo akhethekile ebandleni. Ngani? UPawulu uyachaza: “Ngempela uma noma ubani engazi ukuthi angayengamela kanjani indlu yakhe siqu, angalinakekela kanjani ibandla likaNkulunkulu?” (1 Thimothewu 3:5) Uma abomkhaya wakhe bengazimisele ukuzithoba ekwengameleni kwakhe, abanye bayosabela kanjani?

“Enabantwana Abakholwayo”

5, 6. (a) Iyiphi imfuneko ngokuqondene nezingane uPawulu ayiphawula kuThithu? (b) Yini elindelekile kubadala abanezingane?

⁵ Lapho eyala uThithu ukuba amise ababonisi emabandleni aseKrethe, uPawulu wathi: “Uma kukhona noma iyiphi indoda okungekho cala ebekwa lona, indoda enomfazi oyedwa, enabantwana abakholwayo abangekho ngaphansi kwecala lokuzitika ngamanyala noma abangalawuleki. Ngoba umbonisi kumelwe abe umuntu okungekho cala abekwa lona njengomphathi kaNkulunkulu.” Isho ukuthini ngempela imfuneko yokuba “nabantwana abakholwayo”?—Thithu 1:6, 7.

⁶ Amazwi athi “abantwana abakholwayo” abhekisela ezinganeni esezizinikezele kakade kuJehova futhi esezibhapathiziwe noma ezinganeni ezithuthukela ekuzinikezeleni nasobhapathizweni. Ngokuvamile amalungu ebandla alindele ukuba izingane zabadala ziziphathe kahle futhi zilalele. Kufanele kubonakale ukuthi umdala wenza konke angakwenza ukuze akhe ukholo ezinganeni zakhe. INkosi uSolomoni yabhala: “Khulisa umntwana ngendlela eyakuba-ngeyakhe; kuyakuthi lapho esekhulile, angasuki kuyo.” (IzAga 22:6) Kodwa kuthiwani uma omusha oye wathola ukuqeqeshwa okunjalo enqaba ukukhonza uJehova noma enza ngisho nobubi obungathi sína?

 7. (a) Kungani kusobala ukuthi IzAga 22:6 azibeki umthetho ongaguquki? (b) Uma ingane yomdala ingakhethi ukukhonza uJehova, kungani umdala engeke amane nje alahlekelwe amalungelo akhe?

⁷ Kusobala ukuthi isaga esicashunwe ngenhla asibeki umthetho ongaguquki. Asisiphelisi isimiso sokuzikhethela. (Duteronomi 30:15, 16, 19) Lapho indodana noma indodakazi isingazimela, kumelwe izenzele isinqumo sayo siqu ngokuqondene nokuzinikezela nobhapathizo. Uma kusobala ukuthi umdala uye wanikeza usizo olungokomoya oludingekayo, isiqondiso, nesiyalo kodwa osemusha engakhethi ukukhonza uJehova, umdala akamane nje aphucwe ilungelo lokukhonza njengombonisi. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, uma umdala enezingane ezincane eziningana ezihlala ekhaya, eziba ezigulayo ngokomoya futhi zingene enkathazweni ngokulandelana kwazo, angase angabe esabhekwa ‘njengomuntu owengamela indlu yakhe siqu ngendlela enhle.’ (1 Thimothewu 3:4) Iphuzu liwukuthi, kufanele kubonakale ukuthi umbonisi wenza konke okusemandleni akhe ukuze abe “nabantwana abakholwayo abangekho ngaphansi kwecala lokuzitika ngamanyala noma abangalawuleki.”a

Uma Eshade “Nomfazi Ongakholwayo”

 8. Umdala kufanele amphathe kanjani umkakhe ongakholwa?

⁸ Ngokuqondene namadoda angamaKristu ashade nabangakholwayo, uPawulu wabhala: “Uma kukhona umfowethu onomfazi ongakholwayo, kodwa nokho umfazi evuma ukuhlala naye, makangamshiyi . . . Ngoba . . . umfazi ongakholwayo ungcwelisiwe ngokuqondene nomfowethu; uma kungenjalo, abantwana benu ngempela babeyoba abangahlanzekile, kodwa manje bangcwele. Ngoba, . . . wena ndoda, wazi ngani ukuthi ngeke umsindise umkakho?” (1 Korinte 7:12-14, 16) Lapha igama elithi “ongakholwayo” alibhekiseli kumfazi ongenazo izinkolelo ezingokwenkolo kodwa libhekisela kowesifazane ongazinikezele kuJehova. Wayengaba umJuda, noma okholelwa konkulunkulu bamaqaba. Namuhla, umdala angaba oshade nowesifazane okwenye inkolo, okholelwa ekutheni uNkulunkulu akaziwa, noma ophika ngisho nobukhona bukaNkulunkulu. Uma owesifazane ezimisele ukuhlala naye, umdala akufanele amshiye ngenxa nje yokuthi banezinkolelo ezingafani. Kufanele aqhubeke ‘ehlala naye ngokolwazi, emnika udumo njengesitsha esibuthakathaka kakhudlwana, isifazane,’ ahlalele ethembeni lokuthi uyomsindisa.—1 Petru 3:7; Kolose 3:19.

 9. Emazweni lapho umthetho unikeza bobabili indoda nomfazi ilungelo lokuba ngamunye azise izingane zakhe ngezinkolelo zakhe ezingokwenkolo, umdala kufanele enzeni, futhi lokhu kuyowathinta kanjani amalungelo akhe?

⁹ Uma umbonisi enezingane, uyosebenzisa ubunhloko ngendlela efanele njengendoda nobaba ekuzikhuliseni “ngesiyalo nangokuqondisa umqondo kukaJehova.” (Efesu 6:4) Emazweni amaningi umthetho ubanikeza bobabili abangane bomshado ilungelo lokunikeza izingane zabo imfundo engokwenkolo. Kulesi simo umfazi angase afune ngenkani ukusebenzisa ilungelo lakhe lokwenza izingane zazi ngezinkolelo nemikhuba yakhe engokwenkolo, okungase kuhlanganise ukuya nazo esontweni lakhe.b Yebo, izingane kufanele zilandele unembeza wazo oqeqeshwe ngeBhayibheli ngokuqondene nokungahlanganyeli ezinqubweni zenkolo. Njengenhloko yomkhaya, ubaba uyosebenzisa ilungelo lakhe lokutadisha nezingane nokuya nazo emihlanganweni eHholo LoMbuso lapho kungenzeka khona. Lapho sezikwazi ukuzenzela izinqumo, ziyozinqumela ngokwazo ukuthi iyiphi indlela ezizoyilandela. (Joshuwa 24:15) Uma abadala abakanye naye namalungu ebandla bengabona ukuthi wenza konke umthetho omvumela ukuba akwenze ukuze afundise izingane zakhe ngokufanele ngendlela yeqiniso, ngeke angafaneleki ukuba umbonisi.

‘Owengamela Indlu Yakhe Ngendlela Enhle’

10. Uma indoda yomkhaya ingumdala, siyini isibopho sayo esiyinhloko?

¹⁰ Ngisho nakumdala ongubaba futhi umkakhe ongumKristu kanye naye, akuyona into elula ukucaza kahle isikhathi nokunaka kwakhe phakathi komkakhe, izingane, nemithwalo yemfanelo yebandla. ImiBhalo ikubeka ngokucacile ukuthi ubaba ongumKristu unesibopho sokunakekela umkakhe nezingane zakhe. UPawulu wabhala: “Ngokuqinisekile uma noma ubani engabondli abakubo siqu, futhi ikakhulukazi labo abangamalungu endlu yakhe, uluphikile ukholo futhi mubi kakhulu kunomuntu ongenalo ukholo.” (1 Thimothewu 5:8) Kuleyo ncwadi efanayo, uPawulu waphawula ukuthi amadoda ashadile kuphela ayesezibonakalisile kakade ukuthi angamadoda nobaba abaqotho, okufanele atuswe ukuba akhonze njengababonisi.—1 Thimothewu 3:1-5.

11. (a) Umdala kufanele ‘ondle abakubo siqu’ ngaziphi izindlela? (b) Lokhu kungamsiza kanjani umdala ukuba afeze imithwalo yakhe yemfanelo yebandla?

¹¹ Umdala kufanele ‘ondle’ abakubo siqu hhayi ngokwezinto ezibonakalayo kuphela kodwa nangokomoya nangokomzwelo. INkosi ehlakaniphile uSolomoni yabhala: “Qeda umsebenzi wakho ngaphandle, uzilungiselele wona ensimini, wakhe ngasemuva indlu yakho.” (IzAga 24:27) Ngakho njengoba enakekela izidingo ezingokwenyama, ezingokomzwelo, nezokuzijabulisa zomkakhe nezingane zakhe, umbonisi kufanele abakhe nangokomoya. Lokhu kuthatha isikhathi—isikhathi angeke akwazi ukusinikela ezindabeni zebandla. Kodwa isikhathi esingaba nomvuzo omkhulu uma kuziwa enjabulweni nasesimweni esingokomoya somkhaya. Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, uma umkhaya wakhe uqinile ngokomoya, kungase kungabe kusadingeka ukuba umdala asebenzise isikhathi esiningi esingatha izinkinga zomkhaya. Lokhu kuyomenza akhululeke engqondweni ukuze anakekele izindaba zebandla. Isibonelo sakhe njengendoda nobaba oqotho siyolizuzisa ibandla ngokomoya.—1 Petru 5:1-3.

12. Kukuziphi izindaba zomkhaya obaba abangabadala okufanele babeke isibonelo esihle kuzo?

¹² Ukwengamela indlu ngendlela enhle kuhlanganisa nokuhlela isikhathi sokwengamela isifundo somkhaya. Kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba abadala babeke isibonelo esihle kulokhu, ngoba imikhaya eqinile yakha amabandla aqinile. Isikhathi sombonisi akufanele sihlale sixinwe amanye amalungelo enkonzo aze angabe esaba nesikhathi sokutadisha nomkakhe nezingane zakhe. Uma bekukade kunjalo, kufanele aphinde ahlole isimiso sakhe. Kungase kudingeke ahlele kabusha noma anciphise isikhathi asinikela kwezinye izinto, enqabe ngisho namalungelo athile ngesinye isikhathi.

Ukwengamela Okunokulinganisela

13, 14. Yisiphi iseluleko “isigqila esikholekile nesiqondayo” esiye sasinikeza abadala abangamadoda omkhaya?

¹³ Iseluleko sokulinganisela imithwalo yemfanelo yasekhaya neyebandla asisisha. Sekuyiminyaka eminingi “isigqila esikholekile nesiqondayo” sinikeza abadala iseluleko ngokuphathelene nalendaba. (Mathewu 24:45) Eminyakeni engaphezu kuka-37 edlule, INqabayokulinda yesiNgisi ka-September 15, 1959, amakhasi 553 no-554, yeluleka: “Ngempela, akuyona yini indaba yokulinganisela zonke lezi zimfuno esikhathini sethu? Kulokhu kulinganisela sebenzisa isikhathi esifanele ezithakazelweni zomkhaya wakho. Ngokuqinisekile uJehova uNkulunkulu akanakulindela indoda ukuba isebenzise sonke isikhathi sayo emsebenzini webandla, isiza abafowabo nomakhelwane ukuba bathole insindiso, kodwa ingakukhathaleli ukusindiswa komkhaya wayo siqu. Umfazi nezingane zendoda ziwumthwalo wemfanelo oyinhloko.”

¹⁴ INqabayokulinda ka-November 1, 1986, ikhasi 22, yeluleka: “Ukuhlanganyela enkonzweni yasensimini njengomkhaya kuyonisondeza eduze, nokho izidingo zabantwana ezingajwayelekile zidinga ukusetshenziswa kwesinye sesikhathi sakho namandla angokomzwelo. Ngakho-ke, kudingeka ukulinganisela ekunqumeni ukuthi singakanani isikhathi ongasisebenzisa . . . emisebenzini yebandla kuyilapho unakekela futhi ‘abakwakho’ ngokomoya, ngokomzwelo, nangokwezinto ezibonakalayo. [UmKristu] kumelwe ‘afunde kuqala ukuhlonipha indlu yakwakhe.’ (1 Thimothewu 5:4, 8)”

15. Kungani umdala onomfazi nezingane edinga ukuhlakanipha nokuqonda?

¹⁵ Isaga esingokomBhalo sithi: “Indlu iyakhiwa ngokuhlakanipha, iqiniswe ngokuqonda.” (IzAga 24:3) Yebo, ukuze umbonisi afeze imisebenzi yakhe engokwasezulwini futhi ngesikhathi esifanayo akhe indlu yakhe, ngokuqinisekile udinga ukuhlakanipha nokuqonda. NgokomBhalo, unezindima ezingaphezu kweyodwa okumelwe azengamele. Lezi zindima zihlanganisa umkhaya wakhe nemithwalo yakhe yemfanelo yebandla. Udinga ukuqonda ukuze alinganisele phakathi kwalezi zindima. (Filipi 1:9, 10) Udinga ukuhlakanipha ukuze ahlele izinto eziza kuqala kuye. (IzAga 2:10, 11) Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi uzizwa enomthwalo wemfanelo kangakanani wokunakekela amalungelo akhe asebandleni, kufanele aqaphele ukuthi njengendoda nobaba, umthwalo wakhe wemfanelo oyinhloko awunikezwe uNkulunkulu uwukunakekela nokusindisa umkhaya wakhe.

Obaba Abaqotho Nabadala Abaqotho

16. Uma umdala engubaba futhi, kunayiphi inzuzo?

¹⁶ Umdala onezingane eziziphethe kahle angaba usizo lwangempela. Uma eye wafunda ukunakekela kahle umkhaya wakhe, uyakwazi ukusiza eminye imikhaya ebandleni. Uziqonda kangcono izinkinga zayo futhi anganikeza iseluleko esisekelwe kulokho yena aye wahlangabezana nakho. Ngokujabulisayo, izinkulungwane zabadala emhlabeni wonke zenza umsebenzi omuhle njengabayeni, obaba, nababonisi.

17. (a) Yini indoda engubaba nomdala okungafanele iyikhohlwe? (b) Amanye amalungu ebandla kufanele alubonise kanjani uzwela?

¹⁷ Ukuze indoda yomkhaya ibe umdala, kumelwe ibe umKristu ovuthiwe, okuthi nakuba enakekela umkakhe nezingane zakhe, akwazi ukuhlela izimo zakhe ukuze anikele isikhathi nokunaka kwabanye ebandleni. Akufanele akhohlwe ukuthi umsebenzi wakhe wokwalusa uqala ekhaya. Azi ukuthi abadala abanabafazi nezingane banomthwalo wemfanelo womkhaya wabo nemisebenzi yabo yebandla, amalungu ebandla ayozama ukungafuni isikhathi sabo ngokungafanele. Ngokwesibonelo, umdala onezingane okudingeka ziye esikoleni ngakusasa ekuseni angase angakwazi ngaso sonke isikhathi ukuhlala isikhathi esithile ngemva kwemihlangano yakusihlwa. Amanye amalungu ebandla kufanele akuqonde lokhu futhi abonise uzwela.—Filipi 4:5.

Kufanele Sibathande Abadala Bethu

18, 19. (a) Ukuhlola kwethu eyoku-1 Korinte isahluko 7 kusenze saqaphelani? (b) Kufanele siwacabangele kanjani amadoda anjalo angamaKristu?

¹⁸ Ukuhlola kwethu isahluko 7 sencwadi kaPawulu yokuqala kwabaseKorinte kuye kwasenza sabona ukuthi kunabesilisa abaningi abangashadile abasebenzisa inkululeko yabo ekukhonzeni izithakazelo zoMbuso, belandela isibonelo sikaPawulu. Futhi kunezinkulungwane zabazalwane abashadile abangenazingane, abathi benaka omkabo ngendlela efanele, babe bekhonza njengababonisi abakahle ezigodini, ezifundeni, emabandleni, nasemagatsheni e-Watch Tower, ngokubambisana okuncomekayo nomkabo. Okokugcina, emabandleni abantu bakaJehova acishe abe ngu-80 000, kunobaba abaningi abanganakekeli nje kuphela omkabo nezingane zabo ngothando, kodwa futhi abazinika isikhathi sokukhonza abafowabo njengabelusi abakhathalelayo.—IzEnzo 20:28.

¹⁹ Umphostoli uPawulu wabhala: “Amadoda amadala engamela ngendlela enhle mawabhekwe njengafanelwe udumo oluphindiwe, ikakhulukazi lawo asebenza kanzima ekukhulumeni nasekufundiseni.” (1 Thimothewu 5:17) Yebo, abadala abengamela ngendlela enhle emizini yabo nasebandleni bafanelwe uthando nenhlonipho yethu. Ngempela kufanele ‘siqhubeke sibheka amadoda alolohlobo njengathandekayo.’—Filipi 2:29.

[Imibhalo yaphansi]

Imibuzo Yokubukeza

◻ Sazi kanjani ukuthi abadala abaningi ekhulwini lokuqala C.E. babengamadoda anemikhaya?

◻ Yini edingekayo kubadala abashadile abanezingane, futhi ngani?

◻ Kusho ukuthini ukuba “nabantwana abakholwayo,” kodwa kuthiwani uma ingane yomdala ingakhethi ukukhonza uJehova?

◻ Yiziphi izici umdala okufanele ‘ondle abakubo’ kuzo?

[Isithombe ekhasini 23]

Imikhaya eqinile yakha amabandla aqinile