Why the Family Decay
ABOUT 80 or 90 years ago most persons lived on small farms or in rural communities. Today’s largely urban society, with its many technological marvels, represents a radical change in people’s life-style. Could it be that this change is related to the decay of the family?
Well, life has often become very impersonal in modern cities. There is less caring about the welfare of others than years ago. To illustrate: An old man lay dying on a sidewalk in Oklahoma City. He was bleeding profusely and his tongue was sticking out. A newspaper reported:
“Hundreds of pedestrians walked past him. Some stepped over his body. Scores of drivers drove past without stopping.
“One passing driver, lawyer Henry W. Nichols Jr., stopped to administer first aid to the victim, later identified as Clinton Collins, 77, of suburban Bethany. And while he did, the crowds passed by oblivious, ignoring appeals for help.”
Sad, isn’t it? Yet, unfortunately, happenings like this have become rather common. And the uncaring attitude of people is bound to have an effect on their families. Why is there such lack of concern for others?
Change in Attitudes
It’s due to a basic change in people’s attitudes. And modern technology has contributed to these attitude changes. How so? Well, to sell its many new products, the world makes people feel that happiness is dependent upon having these things. The message everywhere proclaimed is: ‘You only live once, so get all you can NOW.’
People are thus taught to think first of their own satisfaction and pleasure. The result is today’s “me” society. Eminent philosophers at a think-tank conference last summer were evidently worried by the consequences of such thinking. “Too many individuals consider the future to be only one or two years and do not think about what’s beyond,” explained conference moderator Alfred E. Koenig. “There is really very little concern or effort devoted to that which is well down the road.”
Yes, the future has become so uncertain that many ‘live for the moment,’ trying to get all they can out of life now. What effect has this pursuit of immediate pleasure had upon the family?
Effect on the Family
Well, due to worldly propaganda, many persons getting married today think principally of their own personal pleasure. Often enjoyment of sex becomes an overriding concern. Thus, expectations for marital bliss are raised to a level that realization does not fulfill. So couples quickly divorce and seek pleasure in another relationship.
Even persons married for a long time have been victimized by the “me” society’s emphasis on self-gratification. Many are led to think that they are missing out on something, that real pleasure can be found with another sexual partner. Dr. Robert Taylor, who has written extensively on the matter, said: “I believe the ‘me’ philosophy is contributing to the high divorce rate we have now.”
Perhaps the greatest sufferers have been the children. Concerned with their own gratification, many parents have been inclined to sacrifice little of themselves for their young ones. A few years ago the Detroit Free Press noted:
“A mother in the suburbs, her children nearly grown, says she notices a difference in young married couples, those near age 30. They seem so selfish, so self-involved, she says. Money, careers and self come first. The couples don’t care about children, she says, they care only about things.”
Setting the stage for this “me” philosophy was the so-called new morality, which asserts: “Nothing can of itself always be labeled as ‘wrong.’” According to this view, sex relations before marriage can be alright, as can sex with persons other than one’s marriage mate. It all depends on the situation, so it is claimed. But the effect of such views has been disastrous—contributing to a real decay of the family.
Why the Family’s Origin Is a Factor
Modern technology’s marvelous inventions have made possible the enjoyment of many pleasures, and the new morality was supposed to “free” people so they could enjoy them to the full. Yet there are fewer families now that are happy and content than there were years ago before the advent of modern technology. What’s the problem?
Basically, it is this: Humans, flattered with their own wisdom and accomplishments, advanced the idea that marriage and the family are simply of human origin, that they sort of evolved over the ages to fill a human need. But this is a serious error that is at the very root of today’s disastrous family breakdown.
Why so? Because love and marriage, along with family and children, are of a higher origin. The One who created the first man and woman gave them powers of reproduction and joined them together to be a family. (Gen. 2:21-24; Matt. 19:4-6) It was Jehovah God’s stated purpose for this family to increase, producing many other families until the earth would be filled.—Gen. 1:28.
Is it not reasonable that the Originator of the family knows better than anyone else how to make a success of family life? Actually, a basic cause of family unhappiness is the failure of humans to apply the practical direction that our Creator has had recorded for them in the Bible. Is it not wise at least to examine family problems in the light of what this Book says?
The Role of an Unseen Enemy
The Bible foretold that our generation would experience a shocking ‘increase of lawlessness,’ including ‘disobedience to parents’ and “no natural affection.” (Matt. 24:3-12; 2 Tim. 3:1-5) And it points to an unseen, powerful force as a major cause of such family-wrecking problems. Concerning our day, the Bible says: “Woe for the earth . . . because the Devil has come down to you, having great anger, knowing he has a short period of time.”—Rev. 12:9, 12.
But who is this Devil? He is no mythical character. He is a real, invisible person, just as God is. And the Bible shows that he exercises influence on the minds of humans, egging them on to lawless deeds.—1 John 5:19; 1 Pet. 5:8.
Some may balk at this idea. Yet what answers do they have to account for the inhuman, often fiendish and depraved behavior of people, many times directed against their own husbands, wives, children and parents? The only satisfying explanation of such horrible conduct, so contrary to what one would normally expect, is the invisible influence of the Devil and spirit forces allied with him.
In the past it appeared as though history were repeating itself, as one civilization after another rose and then disintegrated, with family breakdown being a feature of the fall. But today is different. The Bible identifies our time as the “last days,” not just of a Greek or a Roman civilization, but of the entire system of things. Also, the activity of the Devil and his demons is to be terminated. Jehovah God promises to bring an end to all wickedness and to usher in a completely new system of things.—2 Pet. 3:13; 1 John 2:17; Rev. 20:1-3.
In the meantime, while we live in these difficult times, what can we do to make our family life happy?