Learning to Adjust to Hearing Problems

THE normal ear is designed to hear. This organ enables one to enjoy the sound of the chirping bird, the rush of a waterfall and the rustle of leaves in the wind​—all delightful sounds that enhance appreciation for being alive.

Because of its ability to gather sound and to transmit this to the brain, the ear is indeed a marvel. But it does much more than just permit one to pick up sound. Its full use is experienced when a person listens to and engages in conversation. His hearing ability enables him to detect the interchange of feelings, concerns and emotions. However, when the sense of hearing is lost, feelings of helplessness, frustration and even anger may result.

To illustrate: What if the words “make,” “rake” and “lake” all sounded the same to you? What if the only way you could tell what was being said would be by seeing the speaker pronounce the word? How would you feel? Needless to say, there would be some frustration.

To ascertain the effect of a hearing problem, read the following sentence out loud: Jo––ua –aw the –mo–– on to– of Moun– –inai. Do you have to read the sentence several times to get the sense of it by supplying the missing letters or sounds? Truly, those missing sounds are needed to understand what is meant. The sentence is, “Joshua saw the smoke on top of Mount Sinai.”

The foregoing illustrates the usual problem experienced when a person loses his hearing ability. Seldom does he lose all sense of hearing. The most common problem comes from not being able to hear all the sounds adequately. Hence, what is heard sounds distorted and confused. A victim of this type of hearing loss observed:

“We think we have understood but have not. For example, when I was courting my wife, I heard her ask me, ‘Do you like people?’​—a type of pretentious gambit I am chronically loath to answer. I replied vaguely and was probably a little abrupt. She looked surprised. What she had actually said, as I learned a few minutes later, was much more promising: ‘Do you like pizza?’

“The result of such mishearings​—and they are perennial with us—​is often robust laughter, good-natured ribbing and a dinner-table anecdote. But the result can also be a serious miscommunication, an inaccurate appearance of slow-wittedness or indifference and the end of friendships.”

Drawing on his own experience, a deaf author relates the following about this handicap:

“In group discussions where you alone are deaf, you do not exist. Because you cannot present your ideas through a medium everyone is accustomed to, you are not expected, much less asked, to contribute to them. Because you are deaf, they turn deaf. Just do what your parents, friends, fellow workers​—who can hear—​tell you . . . While everyone is talking or laughing, you are as far away as a lone Arab on a desert that stretches along every horizon. Everyone and everything is a mirage; you see them but you cannot touch or become part of them. You suffocate inside but you cannot tell anyone of this horrible feeling. You do not know how to. You get the impression nobody understands or cares.”

What About a Hearing Aid?

A person without a hearing problem may be inclined to think that a hearing aid would certainly be the obvious solution to the problem. Although a hearing aid can be helpful, it has limitations.

An expert in the field, Hayes Newby, writes: “Hearing aids are expensive instruments, and it might be expected that once a patient had invested in one he would force himself to learn to operate and adjust to it.” But will he? “A large proportion of hearing aids,” he continues, “end up in the proverbial dresser drawer.”

Probably you know someone who has purchased a hearing aid. Perhaps the person is as close to you as your marriage partner. It may well be that he is not wearing his hearing aid. This may cause frustration for those whose hearing is not impaired. They may say, “If only he would wear his aid, we could communicate much better.”

Still, there must be a reason for his not using the aid. Commenting on the problem, Hayes Newby states: “Too many patients expect that the hearing aid will be the answer to all their hearing problems, and that once they start wearing the aid they will be able to hear just as well as they did when their hearing was normal. Unfortunately, this is not true . . . a hearing aid is an amplifier system, and not a very high-fidelity one. It can serve to make speech louder for the individual, but it cannot make it any clearer.”

So the first problem is with the hearing aid itself. It is limited as to the variety of sounds it can reproduce. While to some extent selectively featuring certain sounds and dampening others, the hearing aid cannot amplify these without a measure of distortion. At best, the quality of the amplification is much more like the sound of a telephone than that of a high-fidelity recording.

A second problem is that persons with hearing problems are all different. No two ears are alike; nor do they hear exactly the same. Hence, an amplification that seems too loud for one person is comfortable for someone else.

This can be illustrated in the case of individuals with “normal” hearing. Some young people may turn up the volume of a record player or radio and appear to be totally comfortable while listening. The parent, meanwhile, is stating emphatically that the music is too loud. Both parent and children may hear the same loudness, but they have different tolerance levels.

Since the hearing aid tends to amplify all sounds, what the wearer can tolerate plays a large part in the effectiveness of the aid. If he uses it at the “comfort” level rather than the “listening” level, he will not be taking full advantage of the instrument’s ability to amplify sound. The hearing aid may be “on” but not “up” high enough to help him to understand speech.

What Can the User Do?

In view of these factors, what can the user of a hearing aid do? First, he must give himself time and discipline himself to get used to his “new ear,” not expecting more from his aid than it is capable of giving. The initial discomfort is similar to that experienced when one gets false teeth or bifocal glasses. Eventually the discomfort decreases as the one using the aid adjusts to the new perceptions of sound.

Obviously, if a person has not heard certain sounds for a long time, he becomes used to not hearing. Even the chirping of a bird or the rustle of leaves can be disturbing if one has not heard these sounds for some time. The hearing-aid wearer may, therefore, feel that he is perceiving too much noise, and refuse to continue using the device. But this will not help him to hear better. The only solution is for him to learn to accept the noise, ignore the undesirable noises and concentrate on those sounds that he wants to hear.

To avoid discouragement, a hearing-aid user also needs to keep in mind that there are occasions when even those with normal hearing miss much of what is being said. Hence, he, too, can expect to obtain poor results at times.

If a hearing-aid wearer appreciates these limitations and does not allow himself to be discouraged by them, he may well reap fine benefits. Certainly, it takes self-discipline to become a successful hearing-aid user.

Being Helpful

Those associating with a person who is hard of hearing can assist him by being understanding. They do well to remember that one learning to wear a hearing aid is experiencing problems and discomfort.

While it may be a trying experience to speak with one suffering from hearing loss, conversation should not be discontinued. Talking with one’s regular voice and with the usual volume is most helpful. Speaking louder may cause distortion for the hearing-aid user. It is best to get his attention and to speak with him face to face so that he can see your lips and face, and visually “read” the lips and facial expressions for clues as to what is being stated. If he does not understand something, rephrasing may be more helpful than just repeating. For example, if the expression, “Do you want to go uptown?” is not readily understood, more clues could be given. Perhaps one could say: “We are going shopping uptown. Would you like to go uptown with us?”

Safeguarding One’s Hearing Ability

Individually, we may not have a hearing problem. Nevertheless, there is wisdom in doing what we can to retain our hearing ability in a noisy industrialized society.

It is generally agreed that exposure to loud noise for extended periods can injure the hearing mechanism. This kind of hearing loss cannot be restored. If a person works in a setting where the noise is very loud (any environment where conversation cannot be carried on at a normal level), he should have his hearing checked at regular intervals to see if the noise is affecting his hearing. It is far better to make needed changes so as to prevent hearing loss than to try to correct it by means of a hearing aid. And, in the case of disease, one should not unduly delay treatment.

Truly, hearing is precious​—a gift from the Creator. Our appreciating its value should move us to be understanding toward those with hearing problems, and to put forth reasonable effort to protect the hearing we may presently enjoy.