Are Schools Replacing Parents?
TODAY, schools are expected to do much more than teach reading, writing, and arithmetic. Many provide meals, moral guidance, and other services once cared for at home. “A growing number of parents expect the schools, especially the guidance counselors, to do their parenting,” observes Jim McClure, head of a high school guidance department.
Many parents, however, face the dilemma of choosing between making an adequate living and caring for their children. Unlike a generation ago, making a living today often means leaving children without the desired parental supervision. Providing that attention, on the other hand, may mean not making an adequate living for the family. Both situations are undesirable.
Beginning of the Downward Trend
Those who have studied the problems that affect modern education believe that the downward trend began over 40 years ago, immediately following World War II. Women supported the war effort by taking up work in the industrial labor market. Then, when the war ended, an appreciable number did not return to their former role as mother and principal tutor of their children. They remained in the work force.
As the years passed, other social changes further complicated matters. Moral values eroded. Divorce became acceptable, leaving a growing number of single-parent homes. Also, the rising cost of living forced more parents to work longer hours. Such trends have greatly limited the hours parents have left to care for the intellectual, physical, emotional, and spiritual needs of their children. Parents have thus come to lean heavily upon schools to fill this void. But is this, in fact, the responsibility of the schools?
Today’s Realities
“The new reality,” explains education writer Gene I. Maeroff, “is that the father who used to return from a hard day’s work faithfully each evening to his homemaking wife and their two well-adjusted children is probably now living alone in a bleak apartment somewhere trying to figure out how to pay for his TV dinners after writing the weekly alimony check. The mother, who remained behind with the children . . . works three days a week.” With what consequences?
“The children,” Maeroff says, “are facing the awesome task of building their educational future on a support system of splinters.” For example, an elementary-school teacher in the United States observes: “Over 20 percent of our students come to school every day without having had breakfast.” Since breakfast is vital to learning, this teacher laments: “We are trying to deal with the problem by setting up a breakfast program.” At the same school, a student came down with a high fever. The mother, reached at her place of employment, responded: “I can’t come for her. I’m working.” She finally did arrange to leave work, but she was “frustrated” by being forced to decide between caring for her sick child and earning money.
Conditions in the Schools
The moral decay of society has seriously damaged the ability of schools to teach. It has made it almost impossible for them to provide moral guidance. Illustrating the changed school environment is the list of the 7 top disciplinary problems in U.S. public schools in 1940 as compared with the top 17 in 1982. The 1940 top problems in school were: (1) talking, (2) chewing gum, (3) making noise, (4) running in the halls, (5) getting out of turn in line, (6) wearing improper clothing, and (7) not putting paper in wastebaskets.
On the other hand, the 1982 top problems in school were: (1) rape, (2) robbery, (3) assault, (4) burglary, (5) arson, (6) bombings, (7) murder, (8) suicide, (9) absenteeism, (10) vandalism, (11) extortion, (12) drug abuse, (13) alcohol abuse, (14) gang warfare, (15) pregnancy, (16) abortion, and (17) venereal disease.
Deborah, a mother of four, worries about the influence this changed school environment will have on her children. “I grew up sheltered,” she reflects. “Almost everyone and everything around me was a support to help me grow up. Those of us who were brought up that way must be aware of the fact that our children are out there in a very different world.”
Indeed, in some inner-city schools in the United States, students commonly carry knives and guns; they use and deal drugs; and expressions like “coke head” (cocaine user) are part of the daily vocabulary. Teachers are often content, not necessarily because they have successfully taught their students, but because they have survived another day without trouble.
The lamentable conditions within the schools underscore the fact that they are unable to take the place of parents in providing the guidance and support that children need to lead successful lives. Yet, regardless of such conditions, there are successful students in all types of schools around the world.
‘What does it take to succeed?’ you may ask. ‘How can I, as a parent, help my child succeed? And what will my child have to do?’