Makolo Phunzitsani Ana Anu Mwachikondi
“Zonse zimene muchita, muzichite mwachikondi.”—1 AKORINTO 16:14.
1. Kodi makolo amamva bwanji mwana akabadwa?
MAKOLO ambiri angavomereze kuti kubadwa kwa mwana ndi chimodzi mwa zinthu zosangalatsa kwambiri pamoyo wa munthu. Mayi wina, dzina lake Aleah anati: “Ndinasangalala kwambiri nditaona mwana wanga wakhanda atangobadwa kumene. Ndinkaona kuti anali wokongola kwambiri kuposa ana onse amene ndinaonapo.” Komabe, zinthu zosangalatsa zimenezi zingachititsenso makolo kuda nkhawa. Mwamuna wa Aleah anati: “Ndinkada nkhawa kuti mwina sindingakwanitse kuthandiza mwana wanga kuti adzathe kulimbana ndi mavuto pamoyo wake.” Makolo ambiri amakhalanso ndi nkhawa imeneyi ndipo amadziwa kuti m’pofunika kuphunzitsa ana awo mwachikondi. Komabe, makolo achikhristu amene amafuna kuphunzitsa ana awo mwachikondi amakumana ndi zovuta zambiri. Kodi zina mwa zovuta zimenezi n’zotani?
2. Kodi makolo amalimbana ndi mavuto otani?
2 Tikukhala m’masiku otsiriza a dongosolo lino la zinthu. Monga mmene Baibulo linanenera, anthu ambiri ndi opanda chikondi. Ngakhalenso m’banja, anthu ndi “opanda chikondi chachibadwa, osayamika, osakhulupirika, . . . osadziletsa, owopsa.” (2 Timoteyo 3:1-5) Chifukwa chokhala ndi anthu otere tsiku ndi tsiku, mabanja achikhristu angakhudzidwenso ndi makhalidwe amenewa. Kuwonjezera pamenepo, makolo amalimbana ndi vuto lawo lachibadwa la kupsa mtima ndi kulankhula kapena kuchita zinthu mosaganiza bwino.—Aroma 3:23; Yakobe 3:2, 8, 9.
3. Kodi makolo angalere bwanji ana awo kuti akhale osangalala?
3 Ngakhale kuti pali mavuto oterewa, makolo angalere ana awo kuti akhale osangalala ndi okonda zinthu zauzimu. Kodi zimenezi zingatheke bwanji? Zingatheke ngati angatsatire malangizo a m’Baibulo akuti: “Zonse zimene muchita, muzichite mwachikondi.” (1 Akorinto 16:14) N’zoona kuti chikondi ndi “chomangira umodzi changwiro.” (Akolose 3:14) Tsopano tiyeni tione mbali zitatu zimene mtumwi Paulo anatchula pofotokoza tanthauzo la chikondi m’kalata yake yoyamba yopita kwa Akorinto. Tionanso mmene makolo angasonyezere khalidwe limeneli polera ana awo.—1 Akorinto 13:4-8.
Kufunika Kokhala Woleza Mtima
4. N’chifukwa chiyani makolo ayenera kukhala oleza mtima?
4 Paulo analemba kuti: “Chikondi n’choleza mtima.” (1 Akorinto 13:4) Mawu a Chigiriki amene anamasuliridwa kuti ‘kuleza mtima’ amanena za kudekha ndi kusakwiya msanga. N’chifukwa chiyani makolo ayenera kukhala oleza mtima? Mosakayikira makolo ambiri angakhale ndi zifukwa zosiyanasiyana zokhalira oleza mtima. Mwachitsanzo, ana amapempha mobwerezabwereza zinthu zimene akufuna. Ngakhale makolo atanena motsimikiza kuti ayi, anawo amapemphabe n’kumaganiza kuti makolowo asintha maganizo, n’kuwapatsa zimene akufunazo. Achinyamata angapereke zifukwa zosiyanasiyana kuti makolo awalole kuchita zinthu zimene makolowo akuona kuti n’zosathandiza. (Miyambo 22:15) Komanso mofanana ndi tonsefe, ana amalakwitsa zinthu mobwerezabwereza.—Salmo 130:3.
5. Kodi n’chiyani chingathandize makolo kukhala oleza mtima?
5 Kodi n’chiyani chingathandize makolo kukhala oleza mtima ndi odekha ndi ana awo? Mfumu Solomo inalemba kuti: “Kulingalira kwa munthu kuchedwetsa mkwiyo.” (Miyambo 19:11) Makolo angathe kuwamvetsa bwino ana awo ngati amakumbukira kuti nthawi inayake nawonso anali “kulankhula ngati kamwana, kuganiza ngati kamwana, [ndiponso] kuona zinthu ngati kamwana.” (1 Akorinto 13:11) Makolonu, kodi mukukumbukira nthawi imene munapempha mayi kapena bambo anu zinthu zachabechabe? Kodi pamene munali wachinyamata munkaona kuti makolo anu samvetsa maganizo ndi mavuto anu? Ngati ndi choncho mungathe kumvetsa chifukwa chimene ana amachitira zinthu zina, komanso chifukwa chimene amafunikira kuwakumbutsa malangizo anu modekha ndiponso mobwerezabwereza. (Akolose 4:6) Dziwani kuti Yehova anauza makolo mu Isiraeli kuti aziphunzitsa ana awo “mwachangu” malamulo ake. (Deuteronomo 6:6, 7) Mawu a Chiheberi amene anamasuliridwa kuti ‘kuphunzitsa mwachangu’ amatanthauza “kuphunzitsa mobwerezabwereza,” “kulankhula nthawi ndi nthawi” komanso “kukhomereza.” Zimenezi zikutanthauza kuti makolo ayenera kulankhula mobwerezabwereza kuti ana ayambe kutsatira malamulo a Mulungu. Pamafunikanso kubwerezabwereza powaphunzitsa zinthu zina pamoyo.
6. N’chifukwa chiyani kholo likakhala loleza mtima sizitanthauza kuti n’lolekerera?
6 Komabe, kholo loleza mtima silikhala lolekerera. Mawu a Mulungu amachenjeza kuti: “Mwana wom’lekerera achititsa amake manyazi.” Kuti zimenezi zisachitike, vesili limanenanso kuti: “Nthyole ndi chidzudzulo zipatsa nzeru.” (Miyambo 29:15) Nthawi zina, ana angaone kuti sayenera kudzudzulidwa ndi makolo. Koma mabanja achikhristu sapereka mphamvu zonse kwa ana kuti azivomereza kapena kukana malamulo a makolo, ngati kuti makolowo amadalira ana popanga malamulo a m’banjamo. M’malo mwake, Yehova, monga Mutu wa banja amapereka kwa makolo udindo wolera ndi kuphunzitsa ana mwachikondi. (1 Akorinto 11:3; Aefeso 3:15; 6:1-4) Ndipotu, kulanga kumagwirizana kwambiri ndi mbali inanso ya chikondi imene Paulo anatchula.
Mmene Mungalangire Ana Mwachikondi
7. N’chifukwa chiyani makolo okoma mtima amalanga ana awo, ndipo mawu akuti kulanga amaphatikizapo chiyani?
7 Paulo analemba kuti: “Chikondi . . . n’chokoma mtima.” (1 Akorinto 13:4) Makolo amene alidi okoma mtima sasinthasintha malamulo awo, ndipo akamatero amakhala akutsanzira Yehova. Paulo analemba kuti: “Amene Yehova am’konda am’langa.” Dziwani kuti m’Baibulo mawu akuti chilango samangotanthauza kukhaulitsa kokha. Mawuwa amaphatikizapo kulangiza ndi kuphunzitsa. Kodi cholinga cha chilango chimenechi n’chiyani? Paulo anapitiriza kuti: ‘Kwa aja amene aphunzitsidwa nacho, chimabala chipatso cha mtendere, ndicho chilungamo.’ (Aheberi 12:6, 11) Makolo akamaphunzitsa ana awo mogwirizana ndi chifuniro cha Mulungu amawathandiza kuti akadzakula adzakhale anthu achilungamo ndiponso amtendere. Ana amene amalandira “mwambo wa Yehova,” amapeza nzeru, kudziwa ndi luntha, zomwe zimaposa siliva ndi golidi.—Miyambo 3:11-18.
8. Nthawi zambiri chimachitika n’chiyani makolo akamalephera kulanga ana awo?
8 Makolo akamalephera kulanga ana awo ndiye kuti sakuwakomera mtima. Yehova anauzira Solomo kulemba kuti: ‘Wolekerera mwana wake osam’menya amuda; koma wom’konda amuyambiza kum’langa.’ (Miyambo 13:24) Ana amene akula popanda kulangidwa amakhala omva zawo zokha ndiponso osasangalala. Mosiyana ndi zimenezi, ana omwe ali ndi makolo okoma mtima ndipo sasinthasintha malamulo awo amakhoza bwino kusukulu, amagwirizana ndi anzawo ndipo kawirikawiri amakhala osangalala. Choncho, n’zoona kuti makolo akamalanga ana awo ndiye kuti akuwakomera mtima.
9. Kodi ndi zinthu ziti zimene makolo achikhristu amaphunzitsa ana awo, ndipo ana ayenera kuona motani zimenezi?
9 Kodi kulanga ana mokoma mtima ndi mwachikondi kumaphatikizapo chiyani? Makolo ayenera kukambirana ndi ana awo zimene anawo ayenera kuchita. Mwachitsanzo, makolo achikhristu amaphunzitsa ana awo mfundo zofunika za m’Baibulo komanso amawauza za kufunika kochita nawo zinthu zauzimu zosiyanasiyana. Makolowo amachita zimenezi kuyambira anawo ali aang’ono. (Eksodo 20:12-17; Mateyo 22:37-40; 28:19; Aheberi 10:24, 25) Ana ayenera kudziwa kuti zimenezi sizingasinthe.
10, 11. N’chifukwa chiyani makolo angafunikire kuganizira zofuna za ana awo popanga malamulo a panyumba?
10 Komabe, nthawi zina makolo amafunika kukambirana ndi ana awo popanga malamulo a panyumba. Ngati achinyamata angakhalepo popanga malamulowo, sangavutike kuwatsatira. Mwachitsanzo, mwina makolo angaganize zoika nthawi yoti ana azikhala atafika panyumba, ndipo angathe kusankha nthawi yeniyeni. Kapena, makolo angathe kupereka mwayi kwa ana kuti asankhe nthawi ndiponso atchule zifukwa zimene asankhira nthawiyo. Kenako, makolo anganene nthawi imene iwo akufuna ndipo angafotokoze zifukwa zimene nawonso asankhira nthawiyo. Ngati makolo ndi ana asiyana maganizo pankhani inayake, kodi makolowo angatani? Nthawi zina, makolo angasankhe kulolera zimene ana awo asankha ngati sizikusemphana ndi mfundo za m’Baibulo. Kodi zimenezi zingatanthauze kuti makolo akunyalanyaza udindo wawo?
11 Kuti tiyankhe funso limeneli, taganizirani mmene Yehova anasonyezera udindo wake mwachikondi pa zimene anachita ndi Loti ndi banja lake. Atatulutsa Loti, mkazi wake, ndi ana ake aakazi mu Sodomu, angelo ananena kuti: “Thawira ku phiri, kuti unganyeke.” Koma Loti anayankha kuti: “Iyayitu, mfumu.” Kenako Loti anapempha kuti: “Taonanitu, mudzi uwu uli pafupi pothawirapo, ndipo uli waung’ono; ndithawiretu kumeneko, suli waung’ono nanga?” Kodi Yehova anati bwanji? Iye anati: “Taona, ndikuvomereza iwe pamenepanso.” (Genesis 19:17-22) Kodi Yehova ananyalanyaza udindo wake? Ayi, koma anaganizira pempho la Loti ndipo anasankha kum’komera mtima pankhani imeneyi. Ngati ndinu kholo, kodi pamakhala nthawi zina pamene mungaganizire zofuna za ana anu popanga malamulo a panyumba?
12. N’chiyani chingathandize mwana kumva kuti ndi wotetezeka?
12 N’zoona kuti ana safunikira kungodziwa malamulo okha, koma amafunikiranso kudziwa chilango chimene angalandire akaphwanya malamulowo. Malamulowo angayambe kugwira ntchito ana akamvetsa za chilango chake. Ngati makolo amangochenjeza ana awo kuti awalanga koma osawalanga, ndiye kuti sakuwakomera mtima. Baibulo limati: “Popeza sam’bwezera choipa chake posachedwa atam’tsutsa munthu, ana a anthu atsimikizadi mitima yawo kuchita zoipa.” (Mlaliki 8:11) Ndithudi, makolo angapewe kulanga mwana pagulu kapena pamaso pa anzake, kuti asam’chititse manyazi. Koma ana amamva kuti ndi otetezeka ndiponso amalemekeza ndi kukonda makolo awo akadziwa kuti makolowo akati “Inde” amatanthauza inde, akati “Ayi” amatanthauza ayi, ngakhale pamene zimenezi zingabweretse chilango.—Mateyo 5:37.
13, 14. Kodi makolo angatsanzire bwanji Yehova pophunzitsa ana awo?
13 Kuti tisonyeze kukoma mtima, chilango ndiponso njira imene tikuchiperekera ziyenera kukhala zogwirizana ndi mwanayo. Pam anati: “Ana athu aakazi awiri ankafunikira kuwapatsa chilango chosiyana. Chilango chimene chinkagwira ntchito kwa mwana wina, sichinkagwira ntchito kwa winayo.” Larry, mwamuna wa Pam, anafotokoza kuti: “Mwana wathu wamkulu anali womva zake zokha ndipo ankafunika chilango chokhwima, koma wamng’ono ankamva ngakhale kungomulankhula mwamphamvu kapena kumuyang’ana.” N’zoonadi, makolo okoma mtima amayesetsa kuzindikira chilango chimene chingagwire bwino ntchito kwa mwana aliyense.
14 Yehova amapereka chitsanzo kwa makolo mwa kudziwa zimene mtumiki wake aliyense angakwanitse kuchita ndi zimene sangakwanitse. (Aheberi 4:13) Kuwonjezera pamenepa, Yehova sakhwimitsa kwambiri chilango, komanso si wolekerera. M’malo mwake, amalanga anthu ake “ndi chiweruziro,” kapena kuti moyenerera. (Yeremiya 30:11) Makolo, kodi mumadziwa zimene ana anu angathe kuchita ndiponso zomwe sangathe? Ndipo kodi mumagwiritsa ntchito zimene mukudziwazo pophunzitsa ana anuwo mokoma mtima? Ngati ndi choncho, ndiye kuti mumawakonda.
Limbikitsani Ana Anu Kulankhula Momasuka
15, 16. Kodi makolo angalimbikitse bwanji ana awo kuti azilankhula momasuka ndipo makolo ena achikhristu aona kuti njira yabwino yochitira zimenezi ndi iti?
15 Komanso chikondi “sichikondwera ndi zosalungama, koma chimakondwera ndi choonadi.” (1 Akorinto 13:6) Kodi makolo angathandize bwanji ana awo kukonda chilungamo ndiponso choonadi? Chofunika kwambiri pochita zimenezi ndicho kulimbikitsa ana awo kunena zakukhosi kwawo, ngakhale kuti zimene anganenezo zingakhale zovuta kuti makolowo azivomereze. N’zomveka kuti makolo amasangalala ngati zonena za ana awo zimakhala zogwirizana ndi mfundo zolungama. Komabe, nthawi zina zonena za mwana zingasonyeze kuti ali ndi maganizo oipa. (Genesis 8:21) Kodi makolo angatani pamenepo? Kawirikawiri, makolo amakonda kulanga ana awo nthawi yomweyo. Makolo akamatero, posapita nthawi anawo angaone kuti ndi bwino kumangolankhula zimene zingasangalatse makolowo. N’zoona kuti mwana ayenera kulangidwa chifukwa cholankhula mwamwano. Komatu, kuphunzitsa ana kulankhula mwaulemu n’kosiyana ndi kuwauza zoti azinena.
16 Nangano, kodi makolo angalimbikitse bwanji ana kulankhula momasuka? Aleah, amene tam’tchula kumayambiriro uja anati: “Chifukwa chokhala odekha ana athu akatiuza zinthu zimene sitikusangalala nazo, anawo analimbikitsidwa kulankhula momasuka.” Bambo wina dzina lake Tom anati: “Tinkalimbikitsa mwana wathu wamkazi kuti azitiuza zakukhosi kwake, ngakhale pamene sakugwirizana ndi maganizo athu. Tinkaona kuti iye angathe kukhumudwa n’kusiya kutiuza maganizo ake, ngati nthawi zonse timam’dula pakamwa n’kumangomuuza zimene ifeyo tikufuna. Komanso, kumvetsera zonena zake kunamulimbikitsa kuti nayenso azitimvetsera.” N’zoonekeratu kuti, ana ayenera kumvera makolo awo. (Miyambo 6:20) Komabe, kulankhulana momasuka kumapatsa makolo mwayi wothandiza ana awo kuti akhale ndi luso la kulingalira. Vincent, yemwe ndi bambo wa ana anayi anati: “Nthawi zambiri tinkakambirana ndi ana athu ubwino ndi kuipa kwa zochitika zosiyanasiyana, kuti anawo aone okha zotsatirapo zake zabwino. Izi zinawathandiza kukhala ndi luso la kulingalira.”—Miyambo 1:1-4.
17. Kodi makolo angakhale otsimikizira za chiyani?
17 N’zoona kuti palibe kholo limene lingatsatire ndendende malangizo a m’Baibulo pankhani ya kulera ana. Ngakhale zili choncho, mungakhale otsimikizira kuti ana anu adzakuyamikirani kwambiri mukamayesetsa kuwaphunzitsa moleza mtima, mokoma mtima ndiponso mwachikondi ndipo Yehova adzadalitsa zochita zanuzo. (Miyambo 3:33) Cholinga chachikulu cha makolo onse achikhristu n’chakuti ana awo aphunzire kukonda Yehova mmene iwo amamukondera. Kodi makolo angakwaniritse bwanji cholinga chabwino chimenechi? Nkhani yotsatirayi ifotokoza mmene makolo angachitire zimenezi.
Kodi Mukukumbukira?
• Kodi kumvetsa kungathandize bwanji makolo kukhala oleza mtima?
• Kodi pali kugwirizana kotani pakati pa kukoma mtima ndi kulanga?
• N’chifukwa chiyani makolo ndi ana amafunika kulankhulana momasuka?
[Zithunzi patsamba 23]
Makolo, kodi mungakumbukire nthawi imene munali mwana?
[Chithunzi patsamba 24]
Kodi mumalimbikitsa ana anu kulankhula nanu momasuka?