Limbitsani Banja Lanu Kuti Likhale Losangalala

1-3. Kodi mabanja amakumana ndi mavuto ati? (Onani chithunzi pamwambapa.)

MWAMUNA wina amene wakhala m’banja mosangalala kwa zaka 38 ananena kuti: “Yehova amadalitsa anthu amene amayesetsa kwambiri kuti banja lawo liziyenda bwino.” Choncho anthu amene akwatirana akhoza kukhala ndi banja losangalala komanso kulimbikitsana kwambiri pa nthawi ya mavuto.—Miy. 18:22.

² Ngakhale zili choncho, Baibulo limanena kuti anthu amene ali m’banja angakhale ndi “nsautso m’thupi mwawo.” (1 Akor. 7:28) Mavuto amene anthufe timakumana nawo tsiku ndi tsiku akhoza kuchititsa kuti mabanja asamasangalale. Popeza si ife angwiro, zolankhula zathu zikhoza kukhumudwitsa mnzathu ndipo nthawi zina pangakhale kusamvetsetsana. (Yak. 3:2, 5, 8) Mavuto ena amabwera chifukwa chopanikizika ndi ntchito komanso kusamalira ana. M’mabanja ena, mwamuna ndi mkazi amatopa kwambiri moti sapeza mpata wocheza n’kulimbitsa ubwenzi wawo. Mavuto monga matenda ndi kusowa ndalama amachititsa kuti anthu asiye kukondana ndiponso kulemekezana m’banja. Mabanja ena amasokonekera chifukwa cha “ntchito za thupi” monga dama, khalidwe lotayirira, udani, ndewu, nsanje, kupsa mtima ndiponso kukangana.—Agal. 5:19-21.

³ Vuto lina ndi lakuti ‘m’masiku otsiriza’ ano, anthu ambiri ndi odzikonda ndipo salemekeza Mulungu. Zimenezi zimasokoneza kwambiri mabanja. (2 Tim. 3:1-4) Ndiyeno pali mdani wina woipa kwambiri amene akusokonezanso mabanja. Mtumwi Petulo analemba kuti: “Mdani wanu Mdyerekezi akuyendayenda uku ndi uku ngati mkango wobangula, wofunitsitsa kuti umeze winawake.”—1 Pet. 5:8; Chiv. 12:12.

 4. Kodi n’zotheka kukhala ndi banja lolimba komanso losangalala? Fotokozani.

⁴ Mwamuna wina wa ku Japan anati: “Ndinkapanikizika kwambiri pofuna kupezera banja langa zofunika pa moyo. Sindinkakambirana ndi mkazi wanga ndipo nayenso anayamba kuvutika maganizo. Ndiyeno posachedwapa anayamba kudwala matenda aakulu. Mavuto amenewa ankachititsa kuti nthawi zina tizikangana.” Mavuto ena m’banja amakhala osapeweka koma n’zotheka kulimbana nawo. Yehova akhoza kuthandiza mabanja kuti akhale olimba komanso osangalala. (Werengani Salimo 127:1.) Tiyeni tsopano tikambirane zinthu 5 zimene zili ngati njerwa zomangira mabanja olimba komanso osangalala. Kenako tidzaona mmene chikondi chingathandizire pa nkhaniyi.

5, 6. Kodi tingatani kuti Yehova azitsogolera banja lathu?

⁵ Kuti banja likhale lolimba, chofunika kwambiri ndi kumvera mokhulupirika zimene Mulungu amanena. Paja iye ndi amene anayambitsa banja. (Werengani Mlaliki 4:12.) Mwamuna ndi mkazi ayenera kumvera malangizo a Yehova n’cholinga choti iye azitsogolera banja lawo. Kalelo, anthu a Mulungu anauzidwa kuti: “Makutu ako adzamva mawu kumbuyo kwako, akuti: ‘Njira ndi iyi. Yendani mmenemu anthu inu.’ Yendani m’njira imeneyi kuti musasochere n’kulowera kudzanja lamanja kapena lamanzere.” (Yes. 30:20, 21) Masiku ano, mabanja angamve mawu a Yehova akamawerenga limodzi Baibulo. (Sal. 1:1-3) Angalimbitsenso banja lawo pochita Kulambira kwa Pabanja m’njira yosangalatsa komanso yolimbikitsa. Ayeneranso kupemphera limodzi tsiku lililonse kuti banja lawo lisasokonezedwe ndi zinthu za m’dziko la Satanali.

⁶ M’bale wina wa ku Germany dzina lake Gerhard anati: “Tikakhala ndi mavuto m’banja kapena kusamvana, malangizo a m’Mawu a Mulungu amatithandiza kukhala oleza mtima komanso kukhululukirana. Makhalidwe amenewa ndi ofunika kwambiri kuti banja liziyenda bwino.” Mabanja akamayesetsa kuchita limodzi zinthu zokhudza kulambira Yehova amagwirizana ndiponso amakonda Mulungu.

 7. Kodi mwamuna ayenera kutsogolera bwanji banja lake?

⁷ Zimene mwamuna amachita potsogolera banja lake zingathandize kuti banjalo likhale lolimba komanso losangalala. Paja Baibulo limati: “Mutu wa mwamuna aliyense ndi Khristu. Mutu wa mkazi ndi mwamuna.” (1 Akor. 11:3) Mavesi oyandikana ndi lembali amasonyeza kuti mwamuna ayenera kutsogolera banja lake motsanzira Khristu. Yesu sankachitira ophunzira ake nkhanza kapena kuwapondereza. Iye anali wachikondi, wachifundo, wololera, wofatsa komanso wodzichepetsa.—Mat. 11:28-30.

 8. Kodi mwamuna angatani kuti azilemekezedwa komanso kukondedwa ndi mkazi wake?

⁸ Amuna ayenera kupewa kuuza akazi awo kuti, ‘Paja inetu ndi woyenera kulemekezedwa.’ M’malomwake ayenera ‘kupitiriza kukhala ndi akazi awo mowadziwa bwino [kapena kuti mowaganizira ndi kuwamvetsa].’ Ayeneranso ‘kuwapatsa ulemu monga chiwiya chosalimba.’ (1 Pet. 3:7) Kaya ali pagulu kapena kwaokha, amuna ayenera kulankhula ndi akazi awo mwaulemu komanso kuwachitira zinthu mokoma mtima. (Miy. 31:28) Zonsezi zimathandiza kuti mkaziyo azikonda komanso kulemekeza mwamuna wake ndipo Yehova amadalitsa banja lawo.

 9. Kodi mkazi angasonyeze bwanji kuti ndi wogonjera?

⁹ Munthu amene amakonda Mulungu ndi mtima wonse amadzichepetsa pansi pa dzanja lake lamphamvu. (1 Pet. 5:6) Mkazi angasonyeze kuti amalemekeza Yehova akamachita zinthu mogwirizana ndi mwamuna wake. Paja Baibulo limati: “Inu akazi, muzigonjera amuna anu, pakuti zimenezi ndiye zoyenera kwa anthu otsatira Ambuye.” (Akol. 3:18) N’zoona kuti mwamuna akhoza kusankha zinthu zimene mkazi wake sagwirizana nazo. Koma ngati zimene wasankhazo sizisemphana ndi malamulo a Mulungu, mkazi wake ayenera kugonjera.—1 Pet. 3:1.

10. N’chifukwa chiyani mkazi ayenera kukhala wachikondi komanso wogonjera?

¹⁰ Mkazi ali ndi udindo wolemekezeka wothandiza mwamuna wake. (Gen. 2:18) Iye anganene maganizo ake mwaulemu pothandiza kuti mwamuna wake asankhe zochita koma ayenera kukhalabe wogonjera. Mwamuna angachite bwino kumvetsera maganizo a mkazi wake. (Miy. 31:10-31) Mkazi akakhala wachikondi komanso wogonjera amathandiza kuti banja likhale losangalala, lamtendere komanso logwirizana. Mwamuna ndi mkazi wake amasangalalanso podziwa kuti akusangalatsa Mulungu.—Aef. 5:22.

11. Kodi kukhululukirana n’kofunika bwanji m’banja?

¹¹ Kukhululukirana ndi chinthu chinanso chofunika kwambiri kuti banja likhale lolimba. Banja limakhala logwirizana ngati mwamuna ndi mkazi wake amapitiriza “kulolerana ndi kukhululukirana ndi mtima wonse.” (Akol. 3:13) Koma m’mabanja ena anthu amasungirana chakukhosi ndipo akapsetsana mitima amanenana zimene analakwitsa kalekale. Zimenezi zimasokoneza kwambiri banja chifukwa limakhala ngati nyumba yokhala ndi ming’alu ndipo kukhululukirana kumavuta. Koma banja limayenda bwino ngati anthu amatsanzira Yehova pa nkhani yokhululukirana ndi mtima wonse.—Mika 7:18, 19.

12. Kodi munthu wachikondi amakwirira bwanji ‘machimo ochuluka’?

¹² Baibulo limanena kuti munthu wachikondi chenicheni ‘sasunga zifukwa’ ndipo ‘amakwirira machimo ochuluka.’ (1 Akor. 13:4, 5; werengani 1 Petulo 4:8.) Izi zikutanthauza kuti sawerengetsera zimene walakwiridwa n’kuganiza kuti basi sangakhululukenso. Pa nthawi ina, mtumwi Petulo anafunsa Yesu kuti, “Kodi m’bale wanga angandichimwire kangati ndipo ine n’kumukhululukira?” Yesu anayankha kuti: “Mpaka nthawi 77.” (Mat. 18:21, 22) Apa Yesu ankatanthauza kuti palibe malire osiyira kukhululukira munthu.—Miy. 10:12.a

13. Kodi tingapewe bwanji mtima wosakhululuka?

¹³ Mlongo wina dzina lake Annette anati: “Kusakhululukirana kumachititsa kuti anthu azisungirana chakukhosi komanso asamakhulupirirane. Zimenezi zimasokoneza kwambiri mabanja. Koma anthu akamakhululukirana amagwirizana ndipo banja lawo limalimba.” Kuti tipewe mtima wosakhululuka, tiyenera kukhala anthu oyamikira. Ndi bwino kukhala ndi chizolowezi choyamikira mwamuna kapena mkazi wathu kuchokera mumtima. (Akol. 3:15) Mukamakhululukirana mudzakhala ndi mtendere mumtima, mudzakhala ogwirizana komanso Yehova adzakudalitsani.—Aroma 14:19.

14, 15. Kodi Yesu anatchula mfundo iti ndipo ingathandize bwanji m’banja?

¹⁴ N’zosachita kufunsa kuti mumafuna kuti anthu azikulemekezani. Mumasangalalanso anthu akamachita zinthu mokuganizirani. Koma mwina munamvapo wina akunena kuti: “Amene uja adziwanso mmene nkhonya yobwezera imawawira.” Nthawi zina tingafune kuchita zimenezi, koma Baibulo limati: “Usanene kuti: ‘Ndim’chitira zimene iye anandichitira.’” (Miy. 24:29) Yesu anatchula mfundo imene tiyenera kutsatira tikasemphana maganizo ndi anzathu. Mfundo yake ndi yakuti: “Zimene mukufuna kuti anthu akuchitireni, inuyo muwachitire zomwezo.” (Luka 6:31) Malinga ndi zimene Yesu ananena sitiyenera kubwezera ngati wina watilakwira. Choncho m’banja tiyenera kuchitira mnzathu zimene tingafune kuti atichitire.

¹⁵ Tikamaganizira zofuna za mwamuna kapena mkazi wathu timalimbitsa banja lathu. Mwamuna wina wa ku South Africa anati: “Timayesetsa kutsatira mfundo imene Yesu ananena. N’zoona kuti nthawi zina timakhumudwitsana koma timayesetsa kuchitira mnzathu ulemu umene tingafune kuti atichitire.”

16. Kodi m’banja munthu sayenera kuchitira mnzake zinthu ziti?

¹⁶ Musamatchuletchule komanso kuuza anthu ena zimene mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu amalakwitsa. Si bwino kuchita zimenezi ngakhale mwanthabwala. Muzikumbukira kuti banja si mpikisano wofuna kupeza munthu wamphamvu, wolalata kwambiri kapena wamwano kuposa mnzake. N’zoona kuti tonsefe timalakwitsa ndipo nthawi zina timakhumudwitsa anthu ena. Koma mwamuna ndi mkazi sayenera kulankhulana mawu achipongwe kapena onyoza. Sayeneranso kumenyana ngakhale pang’ono.—Werengani Miyambo 17:27; 31:26.

17. Kodi amuna angatsatire bwanji mfundo ya pa Luka 6:31?

¹⁷ Kumayiko ena anthu amaona kuti mwamuna amene amaopseza kapena kumenya mkazi wake ndi mwamuna weniweni. Koma Baibulo limati: “Munthu wosakwiya msanga ndi wabwino kuposa munthu wamphamvu, ndipo munthu wolamulira mtima wake amaposa munthu wogonjetsa mzinda.” (Miy. 16:32) Munthu amafunika kukhala wamphamvu kwambiri kuti augwire mtima n’kumatsanzira Yesu Khristu. Paja iye anali munthu wabwino kuposa wina aliyense padzikoli. Mwamuna amene amachitira nkhanza mkazi wake ndi wopepera ndipo ubwenzi wake ndi Yehova ungasokonezeke. Davide anali munthu wamphamvu komanso wolimba mtima. Komabe, anati: “Ngati mwakwiya, musachimwe. Lankhulani mumtima mwanu, muli pabedi panu, ndipo mukhale chete.”—Sal. 4:4.

18. N’chifukwa chiyani tiyenera kuyesetsa kusonyeza chikondi?

¹⁸ Werengani 1 Akorinto 13:4-7. Chikondi ndi chofunika kwambiri m’banja. Paja Baibulo limati: “Valani chifundo chachikulu, kukoma mtima, kudzichepetsa, kufatsa, ndi kuleza mtima. Koma kuwonjezera pa zonsezi, valani chikondi, pakuti chimagwirizanitsa anthu mwamphamvu kwambiri kuposa chinthu china chilichonse.” (Akol. 3:12, 14) Tikamatsanzira Khristu n’kukhala ndi chikondi chololera kuvutikira anzathu, banja lathu limakhala lolimba kwambiri. Izi zimachitika ngakhale tikakhumudwitsana, kudwala matenda aakulu, kukumana ndi mavuto azachuma kapena mavuto okhudza achibale athu.

19, 20. (a) Kodi anthu angatani kuti akhale ndi banja lolimba komanso losangalala? (b) Kodi m’nkhani yotsatira tidzakambirana chiyani?

¹⁹ Kuti banja lathu liziyenda bwino, tiyenera kuchita khama posonyezana chikondi ndiponso kukhala okhulupirika. M’malo moganiza zothetsa banja zinthu zikavuta, tiyenera kuyesetsa kulilimbitsa. Akhristu amene amakonda Yehova komanso mwamuna kapena mkazi wawo amayesetsa kuthetsa mavuto. Paja chikondi n’chothandiza nthawi zonse.—1 Akor. 13:8; Mat. 19:5, 6; Aheb. 13:4.

²⁰ Kukhala ndi banja lolimba ndiponso losangalala n’kovuta m’masiku otsiriza ano. (2 Tim. 3:1) Ngakhale zili choncho, Yehova angatithandize kuti izi zitheke. Koma mabanja ayenera kuyesetsa kuti asamatengere makhalidwe oipa a m’dzikoli. M’nkhani yotsatira tidzakambirana zimene amuna ndi akazi angachite kuti ateteze banja lawo.