Abantu Abaselula Bayabuza . . .

Ndinokuhlangabezana Njani Nesibakala Sokuba Utata Esishiyile?

“Kwakunzima ukukhula ndingenatata. Ndandifuna nje ukukhathalelwa.”—UHenry.a

UJOAN wayeneminyaka eli-13 ubudala ukushiya kukayise ikhaya. Njengoko wayelikhoboka lotywala, akazange akukhathalele kangako ukuqhagamshelana nabantwana bakhe emva kokuba emkile. Okulusizi kukuba, asingoJoan yedwa; baninzi abantwana abaye bashiywa ngooyise.

Ukuba nawe ukwimeko efanayo, usenokukufumanisa kunzima ukuhlangabezana nayo. Maxa wambi usenokuba buhlungu uze ube nomsindo. Maxa wambi usenokuziva uthe nyoxo yaye udandathekile. Isenokubakho nendawo efuna ukuvukela. Umbhali weBhayibhile uSolomon wakha wathi, “ingcinezelo nje isengasiphambanisa isilumko.”—INtshumayeli 7:7.

‘Ukuphambana’

UJames ‘waphambana’ emva kokuba uyise eshiye ikhaya. UJames uthi: “Ndandingathobeli kwagunya, nditsho nomama lo wam. Ndandihleli nje ndixabene. Ndandixoka, ndizimela ngobusuku kuba kwakungekho mntu uza kundixelela nto. UMama wazama ukundinqanda kodwa watsho phantsi.” Ngaba ngokwenene imvukelo inento eyamnceda kuyo uJames? Unotshe. UJames uthi akuzange kube kudala “wazama ukusebenzisa iziyobisi, akahamba sikolo, waza akaphumelela esikolweni.” Baya busithi kratya obu bunjubaqa. Uvuma athi: “Ndandisiba ezivenkileni, ndikhuthuza nabantu. Ndabanjwa kabini ndaphoswa entolongweni ithutyana nje, kodwa ayizange incede nto loo nto.”

Xa kwakubuzwa isizathu sokuba abe nemvukelo ngolo hlobo, uJames wathi: “Sasishiywe ngutata, ndandingaqeqeshekanga. Ngokwenene andizange ndiyicinge indlela endandimenza buhlungu ngayo umama, umntakwethu nodade wethu abeza emva kwam, nam ngaphezulu. Ndandifuna ingqalelo noqeqesho lukatata.”

Kodwa ukuvukela kuzenza mandundu izinto. (Yobhi 36:18, 21) Ngokomzekelo, uJames wazizisela iingxaki kungekuphela yena kodwa kwanonina nabantwana bakowabo, ababa sentlungwini ngokungeyomfuneko. Eyona ide yagqithisa kukuba imvukelo ingabangela umntu angevani noThixo. Ngapha koko, uYehova uyalela abantu abaselula ukuba bathobele oonina.—IMizekeliso 1:8; 30:17.

Ukoyisa Umsindo

Ngoko, unokuhlangabezana njani nomsindo nengqumbo onayo ngotata wakho? Okokuqala, kufuneka ukhumbule ukuba akunatyala ngokumka kukatata wakho. Okanye oko akuthethi ukuba akasakuthandi okanye akakukhathalele. Kuyavunywa ukuba, kusenokuba buhlungu xa utata engasafane atsale umnxeba okanye atyelele. Kodwa njengoko inqaku elandulelayo kolu ngcelele liye labonisa,b ootata abaninzi abashiye amakhaya abanxibelelani nabantwana babo, ingekuba ababathandi, kodwa ngenxa yokuba baziva benetyala yaye bebuhlungu. Abanye, njengoyise kaJoan, bangamakhoboka eziyobisi notywala, yaye oku kuphazamisana nendlela abenza ngayo izinto.

Enoba imeko injani, khumbula nokuba abazali bakho abafezekanga. IBhayibhile ithi: “Bonke bonile baza basilela kuzuko lukaThixo.” (Roma 3:23; 5:12) Liyinyaniso elokuba, oku akuthetheleli intlungu nokungakhathali. Kodwa ukuqonda isibakala sokuba sonke asifezekanga kunokwenza ukuba uyeke umsindo oyingozi nengqumbo.

Oko kuthethwa kwiNtshumayeli 7:10 kunokukunceda uhlangabezane nomsindo nengqumbo onokuba nayo kubazali bakho. Phawula indlela elumkisa ngayo ngokuphathelele izinto ezidluleyo: “Musa ukuthi: ‘Kutheni le nto imihla yangaphambili ibilunge ngakumbi kunale?’ kuba asibobulumko ukukubuza oku.” Ngenxa yoko, kunokuhlalelana nokucinga ngendlela ebezikhe zayiyo izinto, kulungile ukunikela ingqalelo ekulungiseni imeko.

Ukuthabatha Inyathelo Lokuqala

Ngokomzekelo, usenokucinga ngokuthabatha inyathelo lokuqala ngokuqhagamshelana notata wakho. Liyinyaniso elokuba nguye onishiyileyo yaye usenokuvakalelwa kukuba yimbopheleleko yakhe ukuthabatha inyathelo lokuqala. Kodwa ukuba uye wasilela ukwenza njalo yaye ukungaqhagamshelani kwakhe nani kuyakunxunguphalisa yaye akukonwabisi, ngaba akusayi kuba kokulunge ngakumbi ngawe ukuba uphucule imeko? Khawucinge nje ngendlela uYesu Kristu awazisingatha ngayo izinto xa wakhathazwa ngabanye babahlobo bakhe. Ngobusuku bokugqibela bobomi bakhe njengomntu, abapostile bakhe bamshiya. UPetros wazigasa esithi uya kuhamba noYesu noba sekumnyam’ entla. Kodwa uPetros wamkhanyela uYesu—kungekhona kanye kodwa kathathu!—Mateyu 26:31-35; Luka 22:54-62.

Sekunjalo, uYesu waqhubeka emthanda uPetros phezu kwazo nje iintsilelo zakhe. Emva kokuba evusiwe, uYesu wathabatha inyathelo lokuqala ngokumisela kwakhona ulwalamano lwabo ngokubonakala ngokukhethekileyo kuPetros. (1 Korinte 15:5) Okubangel’ umdla kukuba, xa uYesu wabuza uPetros lo mbuzo, “Uyandithanda na?” uPetros waphendula ngelithi “Ewe, Nkosi, uyazi wena ukuba ndinomsa ngawe.” Phezu kwazo nje izenzo ezingathandekiyo, uPetros wayesamthanda uYesu.—Yohane 21:15.

Njengakwimeko kaPetros noYesu, imeko yakho notata wakho isenokungabi mbi njengoko ibonakala. Mhlawumbi angasabela kakuhle ukuba unokuthabatha inyathelo lokuqala njengokutsala umnxeba, ukubhala ileta, okanye ukumtyelela. UHenry, okhankanywe ekuqaleni, ukhumbula oku: “Ndakha ndambhalela kanye utata, yaye wandiphendula esithi unelunda ngam. Ndayifreyimisha loo leta ndaza ndayixhoma eludongeni kangangeminyaka. Ndisenayo nangoku.”

UJoan nabantwana bakowabo nabo bathabatha inyathelo lokuqala lokuya kutyelela uyise olinxila. UJoan uvuma ngelithi: “Wayengekho kwimeko eyiyo, kodwa sakuvuyela ukumbona.” Mhlawumbi nawe kuya kukunceda ukuthabatha inyathelo lokuqala. Ukuba akukho ntsabelo ekuqaleni, usenokulinda kudlule ithuba elithile, uphinde uzame.

Ukuhlangabezana Nentlungu Yokuziva Ulahliwe

USolomon usikhumbuza ukuba kukho “ixesha lokufuna nexesha lokulahlekelwa.” (INtshumayeli 3:6) Maxa wambi umntwana usenokujamelana nesibakala esibuhlungu sokuba uyise engafuni kuba nanto yakwenza nabantwana bakhe. Ukuba nowakho utata unjalo, mhlawumbi ngenye imini uya kuyiqonda indlela aphoswa ngayo ngokusilela kwakhe ukunxibelelana nawe.

Noko ke, okwangoku qiniseka ukuba ukunishiya kwakhe akuthethi ukuba anixabisekanga. Umdumisi weBhayibhile uDavide wathi: “Nokuba ubawo noma bangandishiya, ke yena uYehova uya kundithabatha.” (INdumiso 27:10) Ewe, nisaxabisekile emehlweni kaThixo.—Luka 12:6, 7.

Ngoko ukuba uziva udimazekile yaye udandathekile, sondela kuThixo ngomthandazo. (INdumiso 62:8) Mxelele indlela kanye ovakalelwa ngayo. Qiniseka ukuba uya kukuphulaphula aze akuthuthuzele. Omnye umdumisi weBhayibhile wabhala wathi: “Xa iingcamango zam eziphazamisayo zaba ninzi ngaphakathi kwam, intuthuzelo yakho yaqalisa ukuthuthuzela umphefumlo wam.”—INdumiso 94:19.

Unxulumano olunothando kunye namanye amaKristu lunokukunceda uhlangabezane noko kushiywa. IMizekeliso 17:17 ithi: “Iqabane lokwenyaniso lithanda ngamaxesha onke, yaye lingumzalwana ozalelwe ixesha lokubandezeleka.” Amaqabane anjalo okwenyaniso unokuwafumana kwibandla lamaKristu lamaNgqina kaYehova. Kunokukunceda ngakumbi ukwazana nabanye babaveleli bebandla. Umntakwabo Joan uPeter unikela eli cebiso: “Thetha nabo sele bekhulile ebandleni, yaye baya kukunceda kakhulu. Ukuba uye washiywa ngutata wakho, baxelele indlela ovakalelwa ngayo.” Abaveleli bebandla basenokunikela amacebiso aluncedo ngendlela yokusingatha ezinye iimbopheleleko ebezinyanyekelwa ngutata wakho ngaphambili, njengokulungisa ikhaya.

Kwakhona umama wakho unokukuxhasa. Liyinyaniso elokuba, naye usenokuba uxinezelekile ngokweemvakalelo. Kodwa ukuba uyichaza ngembeko indlela ovakalelwa ngayo, ngaphandle kwamathandabuzo uya kwenza konke okusemandleni akhe ukuze akuncede.

Xhasa Intsapho Yakowenu!

Ukungabikho kukatata wakho kunokuyichana ngeendlela eziliqela intsapho yakowenu. Umama wakho kusenokufuneka ukuba akhangele umsebenzi—mhlawumbi de ibe mibini imisebenzi—ukuze ahlangabezane neendleko zokuphila. Wena nabantwana bakowenu kusenokufuneka nenze imisebenzi engakumbi yekhaya. Kodwa unokukwazi ukuhlangabezana nolo tshintsho ukuba uhlakulela uthando lobuKristu lokungazingci. (Kolose 3:14) Oku kunokukunceda ube nesimo sengqondo esifanelekileyo kuze kucime ingqumbo. (1 Korinte 13:4-7) UPeter uthi: “Ukunceda intsapho yakowethu kuyeyona nto ilungileyo, yaye ndiziva ndanelisekile kukwazi ukuba ndincedisa umama noodade wethu.”

Ngaphandle kwamathandabuzo, ukushiya ikhaya kukatata kuyinto elusizi nebuhlungu. Kodwa unokuqiniseka ukuba ngoncedo lukaThixo nangoncedo lwabahlobo abanothando abangamaKristu nentsapho, ninokuhlangabezana nale meko ninentsapho yakowenu.c

[Imibhalo esemazantsi]

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Olunye ulutsha luye lwathabatha inyathelo lokuqala lokuqhagamshelana nooyise