Xa Umntwana Wakho Exoka

Unyana wakho oneminyaka emihlanu udlala kwelinye igumbi.a Kusenjalo, uva into isophuka. Ukhawuleza uye kukroba, xa ufika, umfumana eme ecaleni kwevazi eyophukileyo. Ubhalwe ebusweni ukuba nguye owaphule le vazi.

Umbuza uthi, “Nguwe owaphule le vazi?”

Ukhawuleza aphendule athi, “Hayi Mama, ayophulwanga ndim.”

Esi ayisosihlandlo sokuqala umntwana wakho oneminyaka emihlanu ekuxokisa. Ngaba umele uxhalabe?

Konke ukuxoka kuphosakele. IBhayibhile ithi uYehova uThixo akaluthandi ‘ulwimi oluxokayo.’ (IMizekeliso 6:16, 17) UMthetho owawunikwe amaSirayeli wawuqatha kwabo bakhohlise abanye.—Levitikus 19:11, 12.

Kodwa ukuxoka akulingani. Obunye ubuxoki buyingozi; buthethwa ukuze benzakalise omnye umntu. Ukanti, abanye baxoka kuba besoyika, mhlawumbi kuba bengafuni ukuhlazeka okanye ukohlwaywa. (Genesis 18:12-15) Ngoxa konke ukuxoka kuphosakele, obunye ubuxoki bunobuzaza kakhulu kunobunye. Ukuba umntwana wakho uye waxoka, qala ucinge ngeminyaka yakhe nangesizathu sokuba axoke.

Thetha naye ngale ngxaki ngoxa esemncinci. UGqr. David Walsh, ubhala athi: “Abantwana bamele bafunde ukuthetha inyani nokuba kunzima kangakanani. Ukuze abantu babe nolwalamano oluhle kufuneka bathembane, bangaxokisani.”b

Ungadyuduzeli. Ukuxoka komntwana wakho akuthethi ukuthi uqalisa ukonakala. Khumbula ukuba iBhayibhile ithi: “Ubudenge bubotshiwe entliziyweni yenkwenkwe.” (IMizekeliso 22:15) Abanye abantwana babonisa ubudenge ngokuxoka, mhlawumbi becinga ukuba yindlela elula yokuphepha ukohlwaywa. Noko ke, indlela osabela ngayo ibalulekile.

Zama ukuqonda isizathu sokuba umntwana wakho axoke. Ngaba woyika ukohlwaywa? Ngaba akafuni ukukuphoxa? Ukuba unamaqhinga, kuba efuna ukuzithandisa kwiitshomi zakhe, akungebi mhlawumbi akakakhuli ngokwaneleyo ukuqonda umahluko kwinyani nakwinto engeyonyani? Xa usazi isizathu sokuba umntwana wakho axoke, uya kukwazi ukumnceda.—Umgaqo weBhayibhile: 1 Korinte 13:11.

Ngamanye amaxesha, thetha naye endaweni yokuba umbuze imibuzo. Kwimeko esithethe ngayo ekuqaleni, yomama obesele eyazi into eyenzekileyo, uye wabuza umntwana wakhe wathi: “Nguwe owaphule le vazi?” Lo mntwana uye waxoka, mhlawumbi kuba ebona umama wakhe enomsindo. Noko ke, endaweni yokuba lo mama abuze umbuzo, masithi ebevele wathi: “Yho, waphule ivazi!” Ngokusebenzisa isivakalisi endaweni yokumbuza, wenza lo mntwana angazivi enyanzelekile ukuba axoke, ibe umnceda ukuba anyaniseke.—Umgaqo weBhayibhile: Kolose 3:9.

Khuthaza ukunyaniseka. Abantwana banomnqweno wokukholisa abazali babo, njengomzali sebenzisa loo mnqweno ukuze ukhuthaze ukunyaniseka. Mchazele ukuba ukunyaniseka kubalulekile kwintsapho yenu, ibe ulindele ukuba anyaniseke.—Umgaqo weBhayibhile: Hebhere 13:18.

Menze aqonde ukuba ukuxoka kuphelisa ukuthembana, ibe kunokuthatha ixesha elide ngaphambi kokuba abantu bathembane kwakhona. Mncome xa ethethe inyani ukuze abone ukubaluleka kokuziphatha kakuhle. Ngokomzekelo, usenokuthi, “Ndiyavuya xa uthetha inyani.”

Yiba ngumzekelo. Ngokuqinisekileyo awunakulindela ukuba athethe inyani xa esiva wena usithi, “Yithi andikho” kuba nje usonqena ukuthetha nomntu efowunini okanye uthi, “Ndiyagula namhlanje” kuba nje ufuna ukuphumla.—Umgaqo weBhayibhile: Yakobi 3:17.

Sebenzisa iBhayibhile. Imigaqo yayo namabali akuyo akhuthaza ukuthetha inyani. Incwadi ethi, Funda KuMfundisi Omkhulu, epapashwe ngamaNgqina kaYehova, inokukunceda ufundise umntwana wakho imigaqo yeBhayibhile. Isahluko 22 sinomxholo othi “Isizathu Sokuba Sifanele Sikuphephe Ukuxoka.” (Funda ingcaphulo yale ncwadi kwibhokisi ethi “Incwadi Enokunceda Umntwana Wakho.”) Incwadi ethi