Umshado

Incazelo: Ukuhlanganiswa kowesilisa nowesifazane ukuba bahlale ndawonye njengendoda nomfazi ngokwezindinganiso ezihlelwe emiBhalweni eNgcwele. Umshado uyilungiselelo laphezulu. Ulungiselela ubuhlobo obuseduze phakathi kwendoda nomfazi kanye nomuzwa wokulondeka ngenxa yokuthi kunomoya wothando nangenxa yokuthi ukuzibophelela komuntu siqu kuye kwenziwa umngane ngamunye. Lapho esungula umshado, uJehova akazange enze kanjalo ukuze alungiselele umngane oseduze owayeyophelelisa indoda kuphela kodwa futhi ukuze enze ilungiselelo lokuveza abantu abengeziwe futhi lokhu kwenziwe ngelungiselelo lomkhaya. Ukubhaliswa ngokomthetho kobuhlobo bomshado okwamukelekayo ebandleni lobuKristu kudingekile noma nini uma kunokwenzeka.

Ingabe kubaluleke ngempela ukushada ngokuvumelana nezimfuneko ezingokomthetho?

Thithu 3:1: “Bakhumbuze ukuba bathobele ababusi neziphathimandla, balalele.” (Uma abantu begcina leziyalezo, igama lomuntu ngamunye kulobobuhlobo alihlanjalazwa, futhi noma ibaphi abantwana abakhona bayavikeleka esihlambeni esiwela kulabo abanabazali abangashadile. Ngokungaphezulu, ukubhalisa umshado ngokomthetho kuvikela amalungelo endawo nempahla yamalungu omkhaya uma kwenzeka kufa omunye wabangane bomshado.)

Heb. 13:4: “Ukuganana [umshado] makuhlonishwe yibo bonke, umbhede ungabi-nasisihla, ngokuba izifebe neziphingi uNkulunkulu uyakuzahlulela.” (Ukushada ngokomthetho kufeza ingxenye ebalulekile ekubeni nomshado owamukeleka ‘njengohloniphekayo.’ Uma sichaza “ubufebe” kanye “nokuphinga,” kumelwe sikhumbule okuphawulwe kuThithu 3:1, ocashunwe ngenhla.)

1 Pet. 2:12-15: “Nibe-nenkambo enhle phakathi kwabezizwe, ukuze kuthi lapho benihleba ngokungathi ningabenzi bokubi, ngokubona imisebenzi yenu emihle badumise uNkulunkulu ngosuku lokuhanjelwa. Thobelani izimiso zonke zabantu ngenxa yeNkosi, nokuba kuyinkosi njengokuba ingomkhulu, nokuba kungababusi njengokuba bethunywa yiyo, ukuze bajezise abenza okubi, babonge abenza okuhle, ngokuba injalo intando kaNkulunkulu ukuba ngokwenza okuhle nithulise ukungazi kwabantu abayiziwula.”

Ingabe yayikhona “imicikilisho engokomthetho” lapho uAdamu noEva beqala ukuhlala ndawonye?

Gen. 2:22-24: “UJehova uNkulunkulu wakha owesifazane ngobambo abeluthathile kumuntu [uAdamu], wamyisa kumuntu. Wayesethi umuntu: Lo useyithambo lamathambo ami nenyama yenyama yami; uyakubizwa ngokuthi indodakazi, ngokuba uthathwé endodeni. Ngalokho indoda iyakushiya uyise nonina, inamathele kumkayo; bayakuba-nyamanye.” (Phawula ukuthi kwakunguJehova uNkulunkulu ngokwakhe, uMbusi weNdawo Yonke, owahlanganisa uAdamu noEva. Lokhu kwakungeyona indaba yowesilisa nowesifazane abanquma ukuhlala ndawonye ngaphandle kokuzikhathaza ngegunya elingokomthetho. Phawula futhi, ukugcizelela uNkulunkulu akwenza ngokuhlala njalo kwalobobuhlobo.)

Gen. 1:28: “UNkulunkulu wababusisa [uAdamu noEva]; uNkulunkulu wathi kubo: Zalani, nande, nigcwalise umhlaba, niwunqobe, nibuse phezu kwezinhlanzi zolwandle, nezinyoni zezulu, nezilwanyana ezinwabuzelayo emhlabeni.” (Lapha ukuhlangana kwabo kwaba nesibusiso seGunya elingokomthetho eliphakeme kunawo wonke, bagunyazwa ukuba babe nobuhlobo bobulili futhi banikezwa isabelo esasiyogcwalisa ukuphila kwabo ngenjongo.)

Umuntu angaba yini nesithembu uma umthetho wendawo usivumela?

1 Thim. 3:2, 12: “Ngakho umbonisi umelwe abe-ngongasolekiyo, indoda emfazi munye . . . Amadiyakoni [“izinceku ezikhonzayo,” NW] mawabe-ngamadoda amfazi munye.” (Akukhona nje kuphela ukuthi lamadoda ayenikwe umthwalo wemfanelo kodwa futhi ayeyizibonelo zokulingiswa ngabanye ebandleni lobuKristu.)

1 Kor. 7:2: “Ngenxa yobufebe akube-yilowo nalowo abe-nowakhe umfazi, nalowo-wesifazane abe-neyakhe indoda.” (Lapha akukho ukuvunyelwa kwabangane abaningi bomshado kunoma iluphi uhlangothi.)

Kungani uNkulunkulu avumela uAbrahama, uJakobe, noSolomoni ukuba ngamunye abe nabafazi abangaphezu koyedwa?

UJehova akayena umsunguli wesithembu. Wanikeza uAdamu umfazi oyedwa kuphela. Kamuva, uLameka, umzukulu kaKayini, wazithathela abafazi ababili. (Gen. 4:19) Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi abanye balingisa isibonelo sakhe, abanye bathatha izincekukazi njengezancinza. UNkulunkulu wawubekezelela lomkhuba, futhi ngaphansi koMthetho kaMose wamisa ngisho nezindinganiso zokuqiniseka ngokuphathwa okufanelekile kwabesifazane ababenobuhlobo obunjalo. Wakwenza lokhu kwaze kwaba yilapho kumiswa ibandla lobuKristu, kodwa wabe esefuna ukuba izinceku zakhe zibuyele endinganisweni yena ngokwakhe ayeyimise e-Edene.

Ngokuqondene noAbrahama, wathatha uSarayi (uSara) njengomkakhe. Lapho eseneminyaka engaba ngama-75 ubudala futhi ecabanga ukuthi akasoze amthole umntwana, uSarayi wacela umyeni wakhe ukuba angene encekukazini yakhe ukuze uSarayi abe nengane engokomthetho ngencekukazi yakhe. UAbrahama wenza kanjalo, kodwa kwaholela engxabanweni engathi sína emkhayeni wakhe. (Gen. 16:1-4) UJehova wasigcwalisa isithembiso sakhe kuAbrahama ngokuqondene “nenzalo” ngokuba kamuva abangele ukuba uSara ngokwakhe akhulelwe ngokuyisimangaliso. (Gen. 18:9-14) Kwaze kwaba ngemva kokufa kukaSara lapho uAbrahama athatha omunye umfazi.—Gen. 23:2; 25:1.

UJakobe waba nesithembu ngenxa yokukhohliswa umkhwe wakhe. Akukhona lokho uJakobe ayekucabanga ngesikhathi eyofuna umfazi ePhadani-Aramu. Umbhalo weBhayibheli usitshela ngokuningiliziwe ngokuxabana okungajabulisi phakathi kwabafazi bakhe.—Gen. 29:18–30:24.

Kuyinto eyaziwayo ukuthi uSolomoni wayenabafazi abaningi kanye nezancinza. Kodwa akubona bonke abaqaphelayo ukuthi, ngokwenza kanjalo, wayeqa umyalo kaJehova obekwe ngokukhanyayo wokuthi oyinkosi “akayikuzandisela abafazi, ukuze inhliziyo yakhe ihlubuke.” (Dut. 17:17) Kumelwe kuphawulwe futhi ukuthi, ngenxa yethonya labafazi bakhe babezizwe, uSolomoni waphendukela ekukhulekeleni onkulunkulu bamanga futhi “wenza okubi emehlweni kaJehova . . . UJehova wamthukuthelela uSolomoni.”—1 AmaKh. 11:1-9.

Uma abangane bomshado behluleka ukuhlala ndawonye ngokuthula, ingabe ukwehlukana kuvumelekile?

1 Kor. 7:10-16: “Abaganeneyo ngiyabayala, kungemina kodwa yiNkosi, ukuthi umfazi kangahlukane nendoda;—kepha uma eké wahlukana nayo, kahlale engaganile, kumbe abuyisane nendoda yakhe—nendoda ingamlahli umkayo. Kepha kwabanye kusho mina, akusho iNkosi [kodwa, njengoba ivesi lama-40 libonisa, uPawulu wayeqondiswa umoya ongcwele], ukuthi uma umzalwane enomfazi ongakholwayo, yena-ke evuma ukuhlala naye, angamlahli; nomfazi, uma enendoda engakholwayo, yona-ke ivuma ukuhlala naye, angayishiyi indoda. Ngokuba indoda engakholwayo ingcwelisiwe ngomfazi, nomfazi ongakholwayo ungcwelisiwe ngomzalwane. Uma kungenjalo, abantwana benu ngabe bangcolile; kepha kalokhu bangcwele. Kepha uma ongakholwayo ehlukana nomkakhe, makahlukane naye; umzalwane noma umzalwanekazi kaboshiwe kokunjalo. Kepha uNkulunkulu unibizile nibe-nokuthula. Ngokuba wena-mfazi, wazi ngani ukuthi ungeyisindise indoda yakho? Nawe-ndoda, wazi ngani ukuthi ungemsindise umkakho na?” (Kungani okholwayo eyobekezelela ubunzima futhi azame ngobuqotho ukugcina umshado ungahlukani? Ngenxa yenhlonipho ngomsunguli waphezulu womshado nangethemba lokuthi okholwayo ngokuhamba kwesikhathi angase asizwe abe yinceku kaNkulunkulu weqiniso.)

Uyini umbono weBhayibheli ngokwehlukanisa ngombono wokushada futhi?

Mal. 2:15, 16: “Qaphelani umoya wenu ukuba ningamkhohlisi umfazi wobusha benu. Ngokuba ngiyazonda ukwahlukana, usho uJehova uNkulunkulu kaIsrayeli.”

Math. 19:8, 9: “[UJesu] wathi kubo: Ngenxa yobulukhuni benhliziyo yenu uMose wanivumela ukwahlukana nabo omkenu, kepha kusukela kwasekuqaleni kwakungenjalo. Namanje ngithi kini: Yilowo nalowo olahla umkakhe kungengokuphinga [ubuhlobo bobulili ngaphandle komshado], aganwe ngomunye, uyaphinga.” (Ngakho umngane ongenacala uvumelekile, kodwa akuyona imfuneko, ukuba ahlukanise nomngane ‘ofebayo.’)

Roma 7:2, 3: “Owesifazane oganileyo uboshelwe ngomthetho endodeni isekhona; kepha nxa indoda isifile, ukhululiwe emthethweni wendoda. Ngalokho-ke lapho indoda isekhona, uyakuthiwa isiphingi, uma eba-ngowenye indoda; kepha nxa indoda isifile, ukhululekile emthethweni, angebe-yisiphingi, uma eba-ngowenye indoda.”

1 Kor. 6:9-11: “Ningadukiswa. Nazifebe, nabakhonza isithombe, naziphingi, nazihlobongi, nabesilisa abalalanayo . . . abayikulidla ifa lombuso kaNkulunkulu. Babenjalo abanye kini, kepha senahlanzwa, senangcweliswa, senalungisiswa ngegama leNkosi uJesu Kristu nangoMoya kaNkulunkulu wethu.” (Lokhu kugcizelela ukungathi sína kwalendaba. Iziphingi ezingaphenduki ngeke zibe nengxenye eMbusweni kaNkulunkulu. Nokho, abantu ababephinga ngaphambili, mhlawumbe beshada okwesibili ngokungafanele, uNkulunkulu angabathethelela futhi babe nokuma okuhle kuye uma bephenduka ngempela futhi beba nokholo enanini elihlawulela izono lomhlatshelo kaJesu.)

Esikhathini esidlule kungani uNkulunkulu avumela ukushada phakathi kwezingane zandawonye?

Umbhalo weBhayibheli ubonisa ukuthi uKayini washada nomunye wodadewabo (Gen. 4:17; 5:4), noma kungenzeka washada nomshana wakhe, nokuthi uAbrama washada nodadewabo ngoyise. (Gen. 20:12) Kodwa kamuva, eMthethweni owanikezwa ngoMose, ubuhlobo obunjalo bomshado benqatshelwa ngokuqondile. (Lev. 18:9, 11) Abuvunyelwe phakathi kwamaKristu namuhla. Ukushada nesihlobo esiseduze kuphumela engozini enkulu yokuba izici zofuzo eziyingozi zidlulele enzalweni yabo.

Kungani ukushada komuntu nodadewabo kwakungekhona okungafanelekile ekuqaleni komlando wesintu? UNkulunkulu wadala uAdamu noEva bephelele futhi enenjongo yokuba sonke isintu sivele kubo. (Gen. 1:28; 3:20) Ngokusobala ukushadana okuthile kwezihlobo eziseduze, ikakhulukazi ezizukulwaneni ezimbalwa zokuqala, kwakuyokwenzeka. Ngisho nangemva kokuba isono sesingenile, yayincane ingozi, uma kuqhathaniswa, yokuba kube nokukhubazeka ezinganeni ezizukulwaneni zokuqala, ngoba umkhaya wesintu wawusasondelene nokuphelela okwakujatshulelwa uAdamu noEva. Lokhu kufakazelwa ukuphila isikhathi eside kwabantu ngalesosikhathi. (Bheka uGenesise 5:3-8; 25:7.) Kodwa eminyakeni engaba izi-2 500 ngemva kokona kuka-Adamu, uNkulunkulu wakwenqabela ukushadana kwezihlobo. Lokhu kwasebenza njengesivikelo enzalweni futhi kwaphakamisa ukuziphatha okuhle kobulili ezincekwini zikaJehova ngaphezu kwalokho kwabantu abazizungezile ababehileleka kuzo zonke izinhlobo zemikhuba eyihlazo.—Bheka uLevitikusi 18:2-18.

Yini engasiza ekuthuthukiseni umshado?

(1) Ukutadisha iZwi likaNkulunkulu ndawonye njalo nokuthandazela usizo lokuxazulula izinkinga kuNkulunkulu.—2 Thim. 3:16, 17; IzAga 3:5, 6; Fil. 4:6, 7.

(2) Ukuqaphela isimiso sobunhloko. Lokhu kubeka umthwalo onzima endodeni. (1 Kor. 11:3; Efe. 5:25-33; Kol. 3:19) Kudinga futhi umzamo wobuqotho kumfazi.—Efe. 5:22-24, 33; Kol. 3:18; 1 Pet. 3:1-6.

(3) Ukulinganisela izithakazelo zobulili kumngane womshado. (IzAga 5:15-21; Heb. 13:4) Ukukhathalela kothando ngezidingo zomngane womuntu womshado kungasiza ekumvikeleni esilingweni sokwenza okubi.—1 Kor. 7:2-5.

(4) Ukukhuluma ngendlela yomusa, neyokucabangelana; ukugwema ukuqhuma kwentukuthelo, ukubelesela, nezinkulumo zokhahlo ezigxekayo.—Efe. 4:31, 32; IzAga 15:1; 20:3; 21:9; 31:26, 28.

(5) Ukukhuthala nokwethenjelwa ekunakekeleni indawo yokuhlala yomkhaya nezingubo, kanye nasekulungiseleleni ukudla okunempilo.—Thithu 2:4, 5; IzAga 31:10-31.

(6) Ukusebenzisa iseluleko seBhayibheli ngokuzithoba kungakhathaliseki noma unomuzwa wokuthi omunye wenza konke okumelwe akwenze noma cha.—Roma 14:12; 1 Pet. 3:1, 2.

(7) Ukunakekela ukuthuthuka kwezimfanelo ezingokomoya zomuntu siqu.—1 Pet. 3:3-6; Kol. 3:12-14; Gal. 5:22, 23.

(8) Ukunikeza uthando oludingekayo, ukuqeqesha, nesiyalo kubantwana, uma bekhona.—Thithu 2:4; Efe. 6:4; IzAga 13:24; 29:15.