Kuchita Mogwirizana ndi Lumbiro Lanu la Ukwati!

TSIKU la ukwati lili tsiku lachisangalalo. Lilinso chochitika chofunika kwambiri. Mkwati ndi mkwatibwi amapanga choŵinda chimene chimayambukira moyo wawo wonse. Awo amene amapezeka paukwati monga alendo ndiwo mboni za choŵinda chimenechi, koma Yehova Mulungu ndiye Mboni yaikulu.

Baibulo silimafuna njira zapadera kapena mtundu wina wapadera wamwambo wa ukwati. Komabe, pozindikira za chiyambi chake chaumulungu, ukwati umachitidwa mwa kugwiritsira ntchito lumbiro la ukwati pa mwambo wachipembedzo. Kwa zaka zambiri Mboni za Yehova zagwiritsira ntchito lumbiro lotsatirali la ukwati: “Ine —— tndikukutenga iwe —— kukhala (mkazi/​mwamuna) wanga wa muukwati, ndipo ndidzakukonda ndi kukusamalira (Mkwatibwi: ndi kukulemekeza kwakukulu) mogwirizana ndi lamulo laumulungu loperekedwa m’Malemba Opatulika kwa (akazi/​amuna) achikristu, malinga ngati aŵirife tili ndi moyo limodzi padziko lapansi mogwirizana ndi kakonzedwe ka Mulungu ka ukwati.”a

Kanthu Kena Kokalingalira

Ngati mukulingalira za ukwati, kungakhale kofunika kwambiri kulingalira za ukulu ndi tanthauzo la lumbiro limeneli tsiku la phwando la ukwati lisanafike. Solomo anati: “Usalankhule mwathuku mtima wako, usafulumire kunena kanthu pamaso pa Mulungu.” (Mlaliki 5:2) Bwanji ngati muli mu ukwati kale? Pamenepo mudzapindula kusinkhasinkha za kufunika kwa choŵinda chimene munapanga pamaso pa Yehova. Kodi mukuchita mogwirizana nacho? Akristu amaona malonjezo awo mwamphamvu. Solomo anapitiriza kuti: “Chita chomwe unachiŵindacho. Kusaŵinda kupambana kuŵinda osachita. Usalole m’kamwa mwako muchimwitse thupi lako; usanene pamaso pa mthenga kuti, Ndinaphophonya.”​—Mlaliki 5:4-6.

Kulingalira chiganizo chimodzichimodzi cha lumbiro la ukwati kungakuzedi kumvetsa kwanu choŵinda chimenechi.

“Ine —— ndikukutenga iwe”: Ameneŵa ndi mawu oyamba a lumbirolo. Amasonyeza kuti mukusenza thayo la inu mwini la kuloŵa kwanu mu ukwati.

M’makonzedwe achikristu, munthu samaumirizidwa mwa Malemba kuloŵa mu ukwati. Yesu Kristu mwiniyo anakhala wosakwatira ndipo analimbikitsa umbeta kwa aja “amene angathe kulandira.” (Mateyu 19:10-12) Komanso, atumwi ochuluka a Yesu anali amuna okwatira. (Luka 4:38; 1 Akorinto 9:5) Kuli kwachionekere kuti chosankha cha kuloŵa mu ukwati nchamunthu mwini. Palibe munthu amene ali ndi ulamuliro wa m’Malemba wa kuumiriza wina kuloŵa mu ukwati.

Chotero, inu muli ndi thayo la kusankha kuloŵa mu ukwati. Mwachionekere, munasankha amene mukukwatirana naye. Pamene mupanga lumbiro laukwati, mukumati, ‘Ndikukutenga iwe ——,’ mumatenga kapena kulandira munthuyo ndi ukoma wake​—komanso ndi zophophonya zake.

M’kupita kwa nthaŵi mudzapeza mbali zosayembekezereka za umunthu wa mnzanuyo. Padzakhala zogwiritsa mwala zanthaŵi ndi nthaŵi. Baibulo limanena kuti “onse anachimwa, napereŵera pa ulemerero wa Mulungu.” (Aroma 3:23) Chotero mufunikira kupanga masinthidwe kuti mugwirizane ndi mnzanuyo. Zimenezi zingakhale zovuta, ndipo nthaŵi zina mungafune kuleka. Koma kumbukirani kuti lumbiro laukwati limapangidwa pamaso pa Yehova. Angakuthandizeni kupambana.

“Kukhala (mkazi/​mwamuna) wanga wa mu ukwati”: Pa ukwati woyambirira, pamene Hava anaperekedwa mu ukwati kwa Adamu, Yehova Mulungu anati “adzakhala thupi limodzi.” (Genesis 2:24; Mateyu 19:4-6) Motero mgwirizano wa ukwati ndiwo unansi wapafupi kwambiri umene umakhalapo pakati pa anthu aŵiri. Ukwati umakugwirizanitsani m’chibale chatsopano. Mumalandira munthu wina kukhala ‘mkazi wanu wa mu ukwati’ kapena ‘mwamuna wanu wa mu ukwati.’ Uli unansi wosiyana ndi maunansi ena. Machitidwe amene amavulaza pang’ono m’maunansi ena angachititse chivulazo chachikulu m’kakonzedwe ka ukwati.

Mwachitsanzo, lingalirani za uphungu wa Malemba wopezedwa pa Aefeso 4:26. Pamenepo Baibulo limanena kuti: “Kwiyani, koma musachimwe; dzuŵa lisaloŵe muli chikwiyire.” Mwinamwake mwakhala musakuthetsa kusamvana kwanu ndi achibale ndi mabwenzi mwamsanga monga momwe muyenera kuchitira. Koma mnzanu wa mu ukwati ndiye munthu wapafupi kuposa wachibale kapena bwenzi lanu lililonse. Kulephera kuthetsa msanga kusamvana ndi mnzanuyo kungaike pangozi ubale wapadera umene uli pakati panu.

Kodi mumalola kusagwirizana pakati pa inu ndi mnzanu kukula kukhala chochititsa kunyong’onya kapena nsautso? Kodi kusamvana ndi mkwiyo zimapitiriza kukhalapo kwa masiku ambiri? Kuti muchite mogwirizana ndi lumbiro lanu, musalole tsiku lonse kupita musanayanjane ndi mnzanu pamene zovuta zibuka. Zimenezi zikutanthauza kukhululukira ndi kuiŵala ndipo kuvomereza zophophonya ndi zolakwa zanu.​—Salmo 51:5; Luka 17:3, 4.

“Ndidzakukonda”: Mkwati amalumbira za ‘kukonda ndi kusamalira’ mkwatibwi wake. Chikondi chimenechi chimaphatikizapo chikondi cha mwamuna ndi mkazi chimene chinawagwirizanitsa. Koma chikondi cha mwamuna ndi mkazicho sichili chokwanira. Chikondi chimene Mkristu amalumbira kwa mnzake nchakuya ndi chachikulu.

Aefeso 5:25 amati: “Amuna inu, kondani akazi anu, monganso Kristu anakonda Eklesia.” Kukonda mpingo kwa Yesu nkwamtundu wosiyana ndi chikondi cha mwamuna ndi mkazi. Mawu akuti “kondani” ndi “anakonda” ogwiritsiridwa ntchito m’lembali achokera ku liwu lakuti a·gaʹpe, limene limatanthauza chikondi chotsogozedwa ndi pulinsipulo. Panopo Baibulo likulamula amuna kusonyeza chikondi chosalekeza, chosagwedezeka, ndi chokhalitsa kwa akazi awo.

Si nkhani ya mkhalidwe wotengeka wakuti “Ndimakukonda chifukwa chakuti umandikonda.” Mwamuna amafuna ubwino wa mkazi wake osati wake, ndipo mkazi amakonda mwamuna wake m’njira yofananayo. (Afilipi 2:4) Kukulitsa chikondi chachikulu kaamba ka mnzanu kudzakuthandizani kuchita mogwirizana ndi lumbiro lanu la ukwati.

“Kukusamalira”: Malinga ndi kunena kwa dikishonale ina, “kusamalira” kumatanthauza ‘kuŵerengera kwambiri, kukhala ndi chikondi pa wina kapena kuchisonyeza kwa iye.’ Muyenera kusonyeza chikondi chanu m’mawu ndi m’zochita momwe! Makamaka mkazi amafuna kusonyezedwa chikondi ndi mwamuna wake nthaŵi zonse. Mwamuna wake angamsamalire bwino mwakuthupi, koma zimenezi sizili zokwanira. Pali akazi amene ali ndi chakudya chokwanira ndi nyumba zabwino koma amene ali osakondwa konse chifukwa cha kusiyidwa kapena kunyalanyazidwa ndi amuna awo.

Komanso, mkazi amene amadziŵa kuti amakondedwa ndi kusamaliridwa amakhaladi ndi chifukwa chosangalalira. Zoonadi, zilinso chimodzimodzi kwa amuna. Chikondi chenicheni chimakuzidwa ndi mawu oona achikondi. M’Nyimbo ya Solomo, bwenzi lake mbusayo akunena kuti: “Ha, chikondi chako nchokongola, mlongwanga, mkwatibwi! Kodi chikondi chako sichiposa vinyo? Kununkhira kwa mphoka yako ndi kuposa zonunkhiritsa za mitundumitundu!”​—Nyimbo ya Solomo 4:10.

“Ndi kukulemekeza kwakukulu”: M’zaka mazana ambiri zapita, papezeka amuna amene achitira akazi nkhanza ndi kuwatsitsa. Ngakhale lerolino, malinga ndi kunena kwa magazini a World Health, “kusautsa akazi kumachitika m’dziko lililonse ndi anthu a malo osiyanasiyana m’zitaganya zonse ndi m’zachuma. M’mitundu yambiri, kumenya mkazi kumaonedwa kukhala koyenera kwa mwamuna.” Amuna ochuluka angalingalire kuti alibe liwongo pa khalidwe limenelo. Komabe, kukuonekera kuti amuna ambiri amalephera kusonyeza chidwi chenicheni pa nkhani za akazi. Chotero, akazi ambiri akulitsa maganizo a kuipidwa ndi amuna. Akazi ena amvedwa akunena kuti, “Ndimakonda mwamuna wanga, koma sindingathe kumlemekeza!”

Komabe, Yehova Mulungu amaŵerengera mkazi amene amayesetsa kulemekeza mwamuna wake​—ngakhale ngati mwamunayo alephera kufitsa ziyembekezo za mkaziyo nthaŵi ndi nthaŵi. Mkaziyo amazindikira kuti ali ndi gawo loperekedwa ndi Mulungu, kapena malo. (1 Akorinto 11:3; Aefeso 5:23) Motero kulemekeza kwakukulu mwamuna wake kuli mbali yake ya kulambira ndi kumvera Yehova. Mulungu samanyalanyaza kumvera kwa akazi aumulungu.​—Aefeso 5:33; 1 Petro 3:1-6; yerekezerani ndi Ahebri 6:10.

Mu ukwati mumafunikira kupatsana ulemu, ndipo uwo uyenera kudza wokha osati kuuyembekezera kapena kuupempha. Mwachitsanzo, mawu olasa kapena onyansa sayenera m’kakonzedwe ka ukwati. Kunena mawu onyodola kwa mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu sikungasonyeze chikondi kapena ulemu. Palibe phindu limene lingakhalepo ndi kuvumbula zophophonya za mnzanu kwa ena kapena kuzinena poyera. Ngakhale mu nthabwala munthu angasonyeze kupanda ulemu kwakukulu pambali imeneyi. Mawu a Aefeso 4:29, 32 amakhudza onse aŵiri mwamuna ndi mkazi. Pamenepo Baibulo limati: “Nkhani yonse yovunda isatuluke m’kamwa mwanu, koma ngati pali ina yabwino kukumangirira monga mofunika ndiyo, . . . mukhalirane okoma wina ndi mnzake, a mtima wachifundo.”

“Mogwirizana ndi lamulo laumulungu loperekedwa m’Malemba Opatulika”: Mulungu amafuna kuti tikhale ndi ufulu wa kusankha ndi kuchitapo kanthu. Samatilemetsa ndi mpambo wotopetsa wa malamulo a moyo waukwati. Komabe, kaamba ka ubwino wathu waika zitsogozo zina.

Lerolino pali nkhani zochuluka zosindikizidwa zonena za ukwati, ndipo anthu ambiri ali ndi malingaliro awoawo. Koma samalani! Pankhani ya ukwati, chidziŵitso chochuluka chimene chikufalitsidwa nchotsutsana ndi Baibulo.

Zindikiraninso kuti mikhalidwe ya okwatirana imasiyanasiyana. Mwa njira ina, anthu okwatirana ali ngati ma snowflake; angaoneke ngati ofanana chapatali, komano kwenikweni iliyonse njapadera, yosiyana ndi ena onse. Kugwirizana kwa umunthu wanu ndi wamnzanuyo palibe okwatirana ena m’dziko amene angakutengere. Chotero musakhale ofulumira kuvomereza malingaliro a ena. Palibe malangizo opangidwa ndi anthu amene amathandiza pa ukwati uliwonse!

Mosiyana ndi zimenezo, zonse zimene Baibulo limalamula nzoona ndi zothandiza. Mtumwi Paulo analemba kuti: “Lemba lililonse adaliuzira Mulungu, ndipo lipindulitsa pa chiphunzitso, chitsutsano, chikonzero.” (2 Timoteo 3:16; Salmo 119:151) Ngati muŵerenga Baibulo ndi kulandira ziphunzitso zake monga chitsogozo m’moyo wanu watsiku ndi tsiku, mudzakhala wokhoza kuchita mogwirizana ndi lumbiro lanu la ukwati.​—Salmo 119:105.

“Malinga ngati aŵirife tili ndi moyo limodzi padziko lapansi”: Zimenezi zimasonyeza mkhalidwe wa kukhalira limodzi kwa nthaŵi yaitali. Mulungu amalamula kuti “mwamuna adzasiya atate wake ndi amake nadzadziphatika kwa mkazi wake.” (Genesis 2:24) Yehova akufuna kuti mukhale pamodzi. Kutumikira Mulungu pamodzi. Kuphunzira Mawu ake pamodzi. Kupatula nthaŵi ya kukawongola miyendo pamodzi, kukhalira pamodzi, kudyera pamodzi. Kusangalala ndi moyo pamodzi!

Okwatirana ena amayesayesa kupatula nthaŵi tsiku lililonse ya kukambitsirana. Ngakhale atakwatirana kwa zaka zambiri, umodzi umenewu ngwofunika pa chimwemwe cha ukwati.

“Mogwirizana ndi kakonzedwe ka Mulungu ka ukwati”: Ukwati uli mphatso yochokera kwa Yehova Mulungu, amene anakhazikitsa kakonzedwe ka ukwati. (Miyambo 19:14) Kulephera kutsatira kakonzedwe kake kungaike pangozi osati chimwemwe cha ukwati wanu chokha komanso unansi wanu ndi Mlengi. Komanso, pamene mwamuna ndi mkazi akulitsa unansi wabwino ndi Yehova, wosonyezedwa mwa kumvera makonzedwe ake, adzakhala ndi maunansi amtendere ndi ena, kuphatikizapo kwa wina ndi mnzake.​—Miyambo 16:7.

Musaiŵale kuti Yehova ndiye Mboni yaikulu ya lumbiro la ukwati wanu. Pitirizani kuchita mogwirizana ndi choŵinda chimenechi, ndipo ukwati wanu udzatamanda ndi kulemekeza Yehova Mulungu!

[Mawu a M’munsi]

[Mawu Otsindika patsamba 22]

Mwa njira ina, anthu okwatirana ali ngati ma snowflake. Onse angaoneke ngati ofanana chapatali, koma kwenikweni okwatirana alionse ali osiyana kwambiri ndi ena

[Mawu a Chithunzi]

Snow Crystals/​Dover