Makolo Olera Ana Ali Okha Amakhala ndi Mavuto Ambiri

“Maganizo anga amangoti balala m’mutumu. Nthaŵi zambiri usiku ndimangodzitsekera m’chipinda n’kumangolira. N’zosautsa kwabasi.”—ANATERO MAYI WINA AMENE AKULERA YEKHA ANA ATATU, DZINA LAKE JANET.

ZINTHU zimene zimapangitsa kuti makolo alere ana ali okha n’zambiri. Mabanja ena akholo limodzi anakhala choncho chifukwa cha nkhondo, masoka achilengedwe, kapena matenda.

Makolo a ana ena safuna kuti akwatirane. Mwachitsanzo ku Sweden, pafupifupi theka la ana onse ndi apathengo. Kutha kwa mabanja kumapangitsanso kuti pakhale mabanja akholo limodzi. Ofufuza amati ana oposa theka la ana onse a ku America adzakhala m’mabanja akholo limodzi kwa kanthaŵi ndithu pa ubwana wawo.

Kuzindikira Kuti Mavuto Alipo Ndithu

Azimayi amene aferedwa amuna awo chaposachedwapa ali ndi mavuto aakulu. Iwo afunika kugwira ntchito zosamalira mabanja awo koma ali m’kati molirabe maliro a amuna awo. Kuti azoloŵere ntchito yawoyo kwinaku akulimbana ndi mavuto azachuma ndiponso kukhazikitsa mitima ya ana awo pansi, pangatenge miyezi ngakhale zaka zimene. Mayi wofedwayo angavutike kwambiri kuti akwanitse kusamalira ntchito zowonjezerekazi. Zimenezi zikhoza kupangitsa kuti mwana aleredwe mopanda chisamaliro chokwanira cha makolo panthaŵi imene mwanayo amakhala akufunitsitsa kusamalidwa ndiponso kulimbikitsidwa.

Nthaŵi zambiri azimayi amene ali ndi ana a bambo amene sanakwatirane naye amakhala ali aang’ono kwambiri ndiponso opanda nzeru zachikulu. N’kutheka kuti amakhala oti sanatsirize n’komwe sukulu. Ndiye poti amakhala opanda luso lenileni la ntchito, kaŵirikaŵiri amakhala osauka ndipo amangolembedwa ntchito za malipiro ochepa. Akapanda kuthandizidwa ndi achibale, monga makolo awo, iwo angakhalenso ndi ntchito inanso yoti azisamalira ana awo tsiku lonse. Mayi wosakwatiwa akhozanso kumavutika ndi mtima, monga kumachita manyazi ndiponso kusukidwa. Azimayi ena angamadere nkhaŵa kuti poti ali ndi mwana angadzalephere kupeza mwamuna wabwino m’tsogolo. Ana a m’mabanja otere akamakula, nawonso akhoza kumavutika mtima posadziŵa kuti chinachitika n’chiyani kuti akhale ndi mayi okha ndiponso pofunitsitsa kuti adziŵane ndi bambo wawo.

Nawonso makolo amene ukwati wawo unatha amavutika mtima kwambiri. Makolo ena akasudzulidwa amakhala ndi ukali wadzaoneni. Makolo ena amalephera kuthandiza ana awo maganizo chifukwa chodziona ngati ndi opanda ntchito ndiponso kudziona ngati anthu ena amanyansidwa nawo. Azimayi omwe angafunike kuloŵa ntchito kwa nthaŵi yawo yoyamba angavutike kwambiri kuzoloŵera udindo woyang’anira ana awo. Angamaone kuti alibe nthaŵi kapena mphamvu zoti asamalire zimene ana awo akufuna, pamene anawo paokha amakhalanso akulimbana ndi mavuto amene awafikira mwadzidzidzi chifukwa cha kusudzulana kwa makolo awo.

Mavuto Apadera a Makolo Osudzulidwa

Makolo olera ana ali okha amazindikira kuti zofuna za mwana aliyense zimakhala zosiyana ndi za wina ndipo zimangosinthasintha. Makolo osudzulidwa omwe ali ndi ana angavutike mwapadera kuti atsogolere bwinobwino ana awo kukonda zinthu zauzimu.

Mwachitsanzo, makolo ena osudzulidwa omwe ndi Mboni za Yehova amakhala oletsedwa kukhala ndi ana awo. Iwo amakonza zoti azikhala ndi nthaŵi yoonana ndi anawo panthaŵi imene amachita misonkhano yachikristu. Motero mwanayo amatha kumagwirizana ndi mpingo wachikristu nthaŵi zonse, ndipo zimenezi n’zothandiza kwambiri kwa ana omwe makolo awo anasudzulana.

Makolo osudzulana amene alibe mipata yokwanira yoonana ndi ana awo afunika kupeza njira zowasonyeza anawo kuti amawaganizira ndiponso kuti amawakonda. Kuti zonse ziyende bwino, khololo liyenera kuzindikira kuti mwana akamakula sakhazikika maganizo. Izi zimachitika makamaka mwanayo akafika msinkhu wosinkhukirapo n’kuyamba kumakonda kuchita zinthu zimene anthu ena onse ndi anzake amachita.

Kholo loyendetsa bwino zinthu limazindikiranso zinthu zomwe mwana wake angakwanitse kuchita, umunthu wa mwanayo, ndiponso kaganizidwe kake. (Genesis 33:13) Kholo lotero limagwirizana kwambiri ndi mwana wake ndipo amachezera limodzi momasuka. Akhoza kulankhulana momasuka nthaŵi ina iliyonse. Zochita za kholo zimam’khudza mwanayo ndipo khololo limakhudzidwanso ndi za mwanayo.

Kuganiza Bwino N’kofunika

Makolo akasudzulana, ana amapindula akamaonana ndi makolo onsewo. Tiyerekezere kuti makolowo ndi osiyana zipembedzo, kholo lina ndi la Mboni za Yehova ndipo linalo ndi la chipembedzo china. Zikakhala chonchi kulankhulana momasuka nthaŵi zonse kumathandiza kuti pasakhale mikangano yopanda pake. Mtumwi Paulo analemba kuti: “Khalani ndi mbiri yakuti mumaganiza bwino.” (Afilipi 4:5, Baibulo la Phillips) Ana ayenera kuphunzitsidwa kusanyoza ufulu wa makolo awo wokhala m’chipembedzo chimene makolowo alimo.

Kholo lomwe si Mboni lingaumirire kuti mwanayo azipita kukapemphera kutchalitchi kwawo. Kodi zitatero, kholo lomwe lili m’gulu la Mboni za Yehova lingatani? Lingamuuzenso mwanayo zimene amakhulupirira ku chipembedzo chawo. Nthaŵi yake ikadzafika, mwanayo angadzasankhe chipembedzo chomwe akufuna, monga mmene anachitira Timoteo adakali wamng’ono, yemwe zimaoneka kuti mayi ndi agogo ake ndiwo anam’phunzitsa mfundo za m’Baibulo. (2 Timoteo 3:14, 15) Ngati mwanayo sakuona bwino kupita ku chipembedzo china, mwina anganizirepo za munthu wina wa m’Baibulo dzina lake Namani, yemwe anati atayamba kupembedza m’choonadi anapitiriza kuchitabe ntchito yake potsatira mfumu yomwe inkalambira pa nyumba ya Rimoni. Ngakhale kuti mwanayo amapezeka pazochitika za kutchalitchi china zomwe zili zachilendo kwa iye, nkhaniyi ingam’thandize kuona kuti Yehova ndi wachikondi ndiponso kuti amamvetsa zinthu.—2 Mafumu 5:17-19.

Kholo loyendetsa bwino zinthu limatha kusintha kaganizidwe kamwana kapena ana ake ndipo limathanso kumvetsa maganizo awo. (Deuteronomo 6:7) Inde, n’zoonadi kuti makolo omwe sanakwatiranepo akhoza kuchita manyazi pa zomwe anachita kumbuyoku. Komabe makolo oterewo afunika kusaiwala kuti mwana aliyense amakhala ndi bambo ndi mayi ake om’bala. Ana amafuna kudziŵa zinthu zokhudza makolo onse aŵiri, ndipo amafuna kudziŵa kuti amakondedwa, osati kuti anangobadwa mwangozi. Kholo lingatsimikizire kuti limakonda ana ake polankhula mwaulemu zinthu zokhudza kholo lomwe palibepo ndiponso pomayankha zinthu zoti n’kuthandiza mwana malinga ndi msinkhu wake, kapena zimene akufuna kudziŵa.

Makolo ayenera kukumbukira kuti mwanayo adzayamba kuona zinthu monga chikondi, ulamuliro kapena mphamvu mogwirizana ndi mmene iwowo amakhalira naye. Pogwiritsa ntchito ulamuliro ndiponso mphamvu zake mwachikondi, kholo lachikristu lingam’thandize kwambiri mwanayo kuti m’tsogolo adzakhale wogwirizana kwambiri ndi Yehova ndiponso womvera akauzidwa zoyenera kutsatira pampingo.—Genesis 18:19.

Ana Akamamvera Zimathandiza

Nawonso ana okhala m’mabanja akholo limodzi ayenera kuzindikira kuti n’zothandiza kukhala omvera kuti banjalo liziyenda bwinobwino. (Aefeso 6:1-3) Akamamvera kholo lawo zimasonyeza kuti amakonda kholo lawolo ndiponso kuti amayamikira ntchito yowonjezereka imene kholo lawo limachita kuti banjalo liziyenda bwinobwino ndiponso kuti anthu onse m’banjamo azisangalala. Ana a m’mabanja akholo limodzi afunika kukumbukira kuti kholo lawo likamayesetsa kuchita zinthu zoti m’banja mwawo azilankhulana momasuka, nawonso ayenera kugwirizana nalo.—Miyambo 1:8; 4:1-4.

Nthaŵi zambiri ana otereŵa amafunika kuyamba msanga kugwira zintchito poyerekeza ndi ana amene akukhala m’mabanja mmene makolo onse alipo. Anyamata ndi atsikana akamakondedwa ndiponso kulangizidwa modekha, amayamba kudzidalira ndipo amaona kuti ndi ofunika akayamba kudziŵa ntchito zofunika m’moyo adakali aang’ono. Komanso anawo akhoza kupatsidwako tintchito tina ndi tina n’cholinga choti azithandiza kuti banjalo liziyenda mwadongosolo.

Izi sizikutanthauza kuti kholo limene lili lokha m’banja liyenera kukhala ndi maganizo akuti ana ake aang’ono ayenera kumachita okha zinthu zodzidalira popanda chithandizo cha makolo. Kunena motsimikiza ndithu, si chinthu cha nzeru n’komwe kum’tayirira mwana wamng’ono kapenanso kumusiya kuti azingochita zimene akufuna.

Nthaŵi zambiri makolo olera ana ali okha amalakwitsa zinthu poganiza kuti ayenera kumachita zinthu ndi ana awo monga pachinzawo ngati kuti ndi ofanana misinkhu. Ngakhale kuti ndi bwino kugwirizana kwambiri ndi anawo, makolo otere ayenera kusaiwala kuti ana amafuna kholo lawo ndiponso kuti mwana si munthu wokhwima maganizo woti kholo lizimuuza zinthu zonse zakukhosi kapena kuti lizimuona ngati ndi mkulu mnzake ayi. Ana anu amafuna kuti inuyo muzichita zinthu monga kholo lawo.

Makolo olera ana ali okha akamakhala nawo mwachikondi anawo banjalo limayenda bwino. Ana oleredwa m’mabanja akholo limodzi akuchulukabe. Motero, aliyense ayenera kuzindikira mavuto apadera amene makolo olera ana ali okha ndiponso ana awo amakumana nawo. Ndipo aliyense ayenera kukhala wofunitsitsa kuwalimbikitsa ndi kuwathandiza mwachikondi.

[Bokosi/Chithunzi patsamba 9]

Ana Amakhudzidwa

Makolo ambiri olera ana ali okha amakhala ndi nthaŵi yochepa yocheza ndi mwana aliyense payekha poyerekezera ndi makolo omwe alipo onse aŵiri. Nthaŵi zina kholo limene lili lokha limakhala ndi munthu wina yemwe si mwamuna kapena mkazi wake. Komabe ukwati wongoloŵana sulimba kwenikweni poyerekezera ndi ukwati wochita kumangitsa. Kaŵirikaŵiri ana a m’mabanja otere amakulira m’manja mwa anthu osiyanasiyana.

Ofufuza ena amati: “Ana am’mabanja akholo limodzi nthaŵi zambiri sakula bwino powayerekezera ndi ana am’mabanja amakolo onse aŵiri.” Komabe tikaonetsetsa bwinobwino zimene ofufuzaŵa amanena, zikusonyeza kuti “chachikulu chimene chimachititsa kusiyana konseku chimakhala mavuto a zachuma.” Izitu sizikutanthauza kuti ana akangokulira m’banja lakholo limodzi ndiye kuti zinthu sizingawayendere bwino. Akamayang’aniridwa ndiponso kuphunzitsidwa moyenerera, iwo angathe kukhala anthu olongosoka bwinobwino.