Thandizani Wachinyamata Wanu Kukula Bwino

1, 2. Kodi ndi zovuta zotani ndi zisangalalo zimene zimadza ndi zaka zaunyamata?

KUKHALA ndi wachinyamataa panyumba nkosiyana kwambiri ndi kukhala ndi wazaka zisanu kapena ngakhale wazaka khumi. Zaka zaunyamata zimadza ndi ziyeso zake ndi zovuta zake, koma zikhozanso kubweretsa zisangalalo ndi mphotho. Zitsanzo monga Yosefe, Davide, Yosiya, ndi Timoteo zimasonyeza kuti achichepere angachite zinthu mwanzeru ndi kukhala ndi unansi wabwino ndi Yehova. (Genesis 37:2-11; 1 Samueli 16:11-13; 2 Mafumu 22:3-7; Machitidwe 16:1, 2) Achinyamata ambiri lerolino asonyeza zimenezo. Mwachionekere, muyenera kudziŵa ena a iwo.

² Komabe, kwa ena zaka zaunyamata zimakhala zovutitsa. Achichepere omasinkhuka amakhala ndi maganizo akukondwa, nthaŵi zina akupsinjika. Anyamata ndi atsikana a zaka zimenezi angafune kukhala ndi ufulu wokulirapo, ndipo angaipidwe ndi ziletso zimene makolo angaike pa iwo. Komabe, achichepere oterowo adakali osadziŵa zambiri ndipo amafunikira thandizo la makolo achikondi ndi oleza mtima. Inde, zaka zaunyamata zingakhale zosangalatsa, koma zingakhalenso zothetsa nzeru—ponse paŵiri kwa makolo ndi kwa achinyamata omwe. Kodi achichepere angathandizidwe motani m’zaka zimenezi?

 3. Kodi ndi m’njira yotani imene makolo angapatsire mwana wawo womasinkhuka mwaŵi wabwino koposa m’moyo?

³ Makolo amene amatsatira uphungu wa Baibulo amapatsa mwana wawo womasinkhukayo mwaŵi wabwino koposa wakupyola mwachipambano m’mayesero amenewo ndi kukhala wachikulire wanzeru. M’maiko onse ndipo kuyambira kale lonse, makolo ndi achinyamata amene anagwiritsira ntchito mapulinsipulo a Baibulo chapamodzi adalitsidwa ndi chipambano.—Salmo 119:1.

 4. Kodi nchifukwa ninji upo wakukambitsirana uli wofunika kwambiri m’zaka zaunyamata?

⁴ Baibulo limati: “Zolingalira zizimidwa popanda upo.” (Miyambo 15:22) Ngati upo wakukambitsirana unali wofunika pamene ana anali aang’ono, koposa kotani nanga m’zaka zaunyamata—pamene achichepere mwachionekere amakhala nthaŵi yochepa panyumba ndi kuthera nthaŵi yochuluka ali ndi mabwenzi akusukulu kapena anzawo ena. Ngati palibe upo wakukambitsirana—kulankhulana koona mtima ndi komasuka pakati pa ana ndi makolo—achinyamata angakhale alendo m’nyumba. Chotero kodi ndi motani mmene njira zolankhulana zingakhalire zotseguka?

 5. Kodi achinyamata akulimbikitsidwa kuiona motani nkhani ya kulankhulana ndi makolo awo?

⁵ Ponse paŵiri achinyamata ndi makolo ayenera kuchita mbali zawo pazimenezi. Zoona, achichepere omasinkhuka angakupeze kukhala kovuta kulankhula ndi makolo awo koposa pamene anali aang’ono. Komabe, kumbukirani kuti “popanda upo wanzeru anthu amagwa; koma pochuluka aphungu pali chipulumutso.” (Miyambo 11:14) Mawu ameneŵa amagwira ntchito kwa onse, achichepere ndi achikulire omwe. Achinyamata amene amadziŵa zimenezi adzazindikira kuti adakafunikirabe upo wanzeru, popeza kuti akuyang’anizana ndi nkhani zovuta kuposa ndi kale lonse. Ayenera kuzindikira kuti makolo awo okhulupirira ali aphungu okhoza bwino chifukwa chakuti adziŵa zambiri m’moyo ndipo asonyeza nkhaŵa yawo yachikondi kwa zaka zambiri. Chifukwa chake, panthaŵi imeneyi ya moyo, achinyamata anzeru samanyalanyaza makolo awo.

 6. Kodi makolo anzeru ndi achikondi adzakhala ndi maganizo otani polankhulana ndi achinyamata awo?

⁶ Kulankhulana komasuka kumatanthauza kuti kholo lidzayesayesa kupatula nthaŵi pamene wachinyamata akufuna kukambitsirana nawo. Ngati muli kholo, tsimikizirani kuti kulankhulana kumakhala komasuka makamaka kumbali yanu. Zimenezi zingakhale zovuta. Baibulo limati pali “mphindi yakutonthola ndi mphindi yakulankhula.” (Mlaliki 3:7) Pamene wachinyamata wanu aona kuti ndi mphindi yakulankhula, mwina ingakhale mphindi yanu yakutonthola. Mwinamwake mumapatula nthaŵi imeneyi kaamba ka phunziro laumwini, kupumula, kapena kugwira ntchito zapanyumba. Chikhalirechobe, ngati wachinyamata wanu akufuna kukambitsirana nanu, yesani kusintha makonzedwe anu ndi kumvetsera. Ngati simutero, mwina sangayesenso. Kumbukirani chitsanzo cha Yesu. Panthaŵi ina, anali atapatula nthaŵi yakupumula. Koma pamene anthu anafika namzinga kuti amve kwa iye, analeka kupumulako nayamba kuwaphunzitsa. (Marko 6:30-34) Achinyamata ambiri amazindikira kuti makolo awo ali otanganitsidwa kwambiri, koma amafuna chitsimikizo chakuti makolo awo ali okonzeka kuwathandiza pamene awafuna. Chifukwa chake, patulani nthaŵi kaamba ka iwo ndipo khalani womvetsetsa.

 7. Kodi makolo ayenera kupeŵanji?

⁷ Yesani kukumbukira mmene zinalili pamene munali wachinyamata, ndipo musataye mzimu wanu wakuseka! Makolo ayenera kusangalala kukhala pamodzi ndi ana awo. Pamene makolo apeza nthaŵi yomasuka, kodi amaigwiritsira ntchito motani? Ngati nthaŵi zonse amafuna kugwiritsira ntchito nthaŵi yawo yomasuka pa zinthu zosaphatikizapo banja lawo, achinyamata awo adzaona zimenezo mwamsanga. Ngati achichepere omasinkhuka aganiza kuti mabwenzi awo akusukulu amawalingalira kuposa mmene makolo awo amachitira, adzakhala ndi mavuto.

 8. Kodi ana angaphunzitsidwe motani kufunika kwa kuona mtima, kugwira ntchito zolimba, ndi mayendedwe abwino?

⁸ Ngati makolo sanaphunzitsebe ana awo kufunika kwa kuona mtima ndi kugwira ntchito zolimba, iwo ayenera kuyesetsa kuchita zimenezo m’zaka zaunyamata. (1 Atesalonika 4:11; 2 Atesalonika 3:10) Kulinso kofunika kwa iwo kutsimikizira kuti ana awo akukhulupirira ndi mtima wonse za kufunika kwa kukhala ndi moyo wa makhalidwe abwino ndi woyera. (Miyambo 20:11) Kholo limaphunzitsa zambiri za zimenezi mwa kukhala chitsanzo. Monga momwe amuna osakhulupirira ‘angakodwere popanda mawu mwa mayendedwe a akazi’ awo, achinyamata nawonso angaphunzire mapulinsipulo oyenera mwa mayendedwe a makolo awo. (1 Petro 3:1) Chikhalirechobe, chitsanzo mwa icho chokha sichokwanira, pakuti ana amaonanso zitsanzo zina zambiri zoipa ndi zokopa zina zonyengerera za kunja kwa banja. Chotero, makolo osamala amafunikira kudziŵa malingaliro a achinyamata awo pa zimene amaona ndi kumva, ndipo zimenezi zimafuna kukambitsirana kophulapo kanthu.—Miyambo 20:5.

9, 10. Kodi nchifukwa ninji makolo ayenera kuphunzitsa ana awo ponena za nkhani zakugonana, ndipo angachite motani zimenezi?

⁹ Zimenezi nzoona makamaka ponena za nkhani zakugonana. Makolo, kodi mumachita manyazi kukambitsirana zakugonana ndi ana anu? Ngakhale ngati mumachita manyazi, yesetsani kuchita zimenezo, pakuti ngati simutero ana anuwo adzaphunzirabe zimenezo kwa munthu wina. Ngati saphunzira kwa inu, mudziŵa bwanji mwina angaphunzitsidwe zosayenera? M’Baibulo, Yehova samachita manyazi kutchula nkhani zakugonana, ndipo makolonso sayenera kutero.—Miyambo 4:1-4; 5:1-21.

¹⁰ Ubwinonso ngwakuti, Baibulo lili ndi malangizo omveka bwino lomwe pazakugonana, ndipo Watchtower Society yafalitsa chidziŵitso chothandiza chochuluka chosonyeza kuti malangizo ameneŵa akugwirabe ntchito m’dziko lamakonoli. Bwanji osagwiritsira ntchito thandizo limeneli? Mwachitsanzo, bwanji osakambitsirana ndi mwana wanu wamwamuna kapena wamkazi mitu imene ingamuthandize m’buku loyamba ndi lachiwiri lakuti Mayankho a zimene achinyamata amafunsa? Mungakondwe ndi kudabwa ndi zotulukapo zake.

11. Kodi njira yogwira mtima koposa ndi yotani imene makolo angaphunzitsire ana awo kutumikira Yehova?

¹¹ Kodi nkhani yofunika koposa imene makolo ndi ana angakambitsirane ndi yotani? Mtumwi Paulo ananena za iyo pamene analemba kuti: “Muwalere [ana anu] m’maleredwe ndi chilangizo cha Ambuye.” (Aefeso 6:4) Ana ayenera kupitiriza kuphunzira za Yehova. Kwenikweni, afunikira kuphunzira kumkonda iye, ndipo ayenera kufuna kumtumikira. Chifukwa chake, chitsanzo chingaphunzitse zambiri. Ngati achichepere omasinkhuka aona kuti makolo awo amakonda Mulungu ‘ndi mtima wawo wonse ndi moyo wawo wonse ndi maganizo awo onse’ ndi kuti zimenezi zikubala zipatso zabwino m’moyo wa makolo awo, angasonkhezereke kuchita chimodzimodzi. (Mateyu 22:37) Mofananamo, ngati achichepere aona kuti makolo awo ali ndi kaonedwe kabwino ka zinthu zakuthupi, akumaika Ufumu wa Mulungu patsogolo, adzathandizidwa kukulitsa mkhalidwe wa maganizo umodzimodzi.—Mlaliki 7:12; Mateyu 6:31-33.

12, 13. Kodi ndi mfundo ziti zimene tiyenera kukumbukira kuti phunziro labanja likhale lachipambano?

¹² Phunziro la Baibulo labanja la mlungu ndi mlungu limathandiza kwambiri kulankhulana ndi achichepere za makhalidwe abwino auzimu. (Salmo 119:33, 34; Miyambo 4:20-23) Kukhala ndi phunziro lokhazikika lotero nkofunika kwambiri. (Salmo 1:1-3) Makolo ndi ana awo ayenera kuzindikira kuti zinthu zina ziyenera kubwera m’mbuyo mwa phunziro labanja, osati mwa njira inayo. Ndiponso, maganizo oyenera ali ofunikira ngati phunziro labanja liti likhale logwira mtima. Tate wina anati: “Chinsinsi nchakuti wotsogoza achititse mkhalidwe wa phunziro labanja kukhala womasuka ndi waulemu—wosangulutsa koma osati wamaseŵera. Mkhalidwe wosapambanitsa nthaŵi zina ungakhale wovuta kupeza, ndipo kaŵirikaŵiri mudzafunikira kuwongolera maganizo a achichepere. Ngati zinthu sizikuyenda bwino kamodzi kapena kaŵiri, limbikirani ndipo yang’anani kutsogolo kunthaŵi yotsatira.” Tate mmodzimodziyu anati m’pemphero lake lotsegulira phunziro, nthaŵi zonse ankapempha mwachindunji thandizo la Yehova kuti onse okhalapo akhale ndi kaonedwe ka zinthu koyenera.—Salmo 119:66.

¹³ Kuchititsa phunziro labanja kuli thayo la makolo okhulupirira. Zoona, makolo ena angakhale asali ndi mphatso yakuphunzitsa mwaluso, ndipo kungakhale kovuta kwa iwo kupeza njira zochititsira phunziro labanja kukhala lokondweretsa. Komabe, ngati mumakonda achinyamata anu ‘m’kuchita ndi m’choonadi,’ mudzakhala wofunitsitsa kuwathandiza mwa njira yodzichepetsa ndi yoona mtima kuti apite patsogolo mwauzimu. (1 Yohane 3:18) Angadandaule nthaŵi zina, koma mwachionekere adzaona chikhumbo chanu chachikulu chofuna kuwathandiza.

14. Kodi Deuteronomo 11:18, 19 angagwiritsiridwe ntchito motani polankhulana zinthu zauzimu ndi achinyamata?

¹⁴ Phunziro labanja sindiyo nthaŵi yokha pamene muyenera kukambitsirana nkhani zofunika zauzimu. Kodi mukukumbukira lamulo la Yehova kwa makolo? Iye anati: “Muzisunga mawu anga awa mumtima mwanu ndi m’moyo mwanu; ndi kuwamanga ngati chizindikiro pamanja panu; ndipo zikhale zapamphumi pakati pa maso anu. Ndipo muziwaphunzitsa ana anu, ndi kuwalankhula awa pokhala inu pansi m’nyumba mwanu, ndi poyenda inu panjira, ndi pogona inu pansi, ndi pakuuka inu pomwe.” (Deuteronomo 11:18, 19; onaninso Deuteronomo 6:6, 7.) Zimenezi sizikutanthauza kuti makolo ayenera nthaŵi zonse kumalalikira kwa ana awo. Koma mutu wa banja wachikondi ayenera nthaŵi zonse kukhala watcheru kuona mipata yokulitsira malingaliro abwino a banja lake pazinthu zauzimu.

15, 16. (a) Kodi chilango nchiyani? (b) Kodi ndani ali ndi thayo lakupereka chilango, ndipo ndani ali ndi thayo la kutsimikiza kuti adzachilabadira?

¹⁵ Chilango ndi chiphunzitso chimene chimawongolera, ndipo chimaphatikizapo kulankhulana. Lingaliro lalikulu la liwu la chilango ndilo kuwongolera kuposa kukhaulitsa—ngakhale kuti kukhaulitsa kungakhalepo. Ana anu anafunikira chilango pamene anali aang’ono, ndipo ngakhale kuti tsopano ndi achinyamata, amafunikirabe mtundu winawake wa chilango, mwinamwake chokulirapo. Achinyamata anzeru amadziŵa kuti zimenezi nzoona.

¹⁶ Baibulo limati: “Chitsiru chipeputsa mwambo wa atate wake; koma wosamalira chidzudzulo amachenjera.” (Miyambo 15:5) Tikuphunzira zambiri pa lemba limeneli. Limasonyeza kuti chilango chiyenera kuperekedwa. Wachinyamata ‘sangasamalire chidzudzulo,’ ngati sichiperekedwa. Yehova amapatsa thayo la kupereka chilango kwa makolo, makamaka tate. Komabe, thayo la kumvetsera chilango chimenecho lili kwa wachinyamatayo. Iye adzaphunzira zambiri ndipo adzachita zolakwa zochepekera ngati alabadira chilango chanzeru cha atate wake ndi amake. (Miyambo 1:8) Baibulo limati: “Wokana mwambo adzasauka nanyozedwa; koma wolabadira chidzudzulo adzalemekezedwa.”—Miyambo 13:18.

17. Kodi ndi kusapambanitsa kotani kumene makolo ayenera kuchita popereka chilango kwa ana awo?

¹⁷ Polanga achinyamata, makolo sayenera kuchita mopambanitsa. Ayenera kupeŵa kukhala oumitsa zinthu kwambiri moti nkuputa ana awo, mwinamwake ngakhale kuchititsa ana awo kuleka kudzidalira. (Akolose 3:21) Komanso makolo sayenera kukhala olekerera moti nkulephera kupatsa ana awo chiphunzitso chofunikira. Kulekerera mwana kwa choncho nkwangozi. Miyambo 29:17 (NW), imati: “Langa mwana wako ndipo adzakupumitsa nadzasangalatsa kwambiri moyo wako.” Komabe, vesi 21 limati: “Ngati munthu alekerera kapolo wake kuyambira paubwana, atakula adzakhala wosayamikira.” Ngakhale kuti vesili likulankhula za kapolo, limagwiranso ntchito kwa wachinyamata aliyense m’banja.

18. Kodi chilango chili umboni wa chiyani, ndipo kodi nchiyani chimene chimapeŵedwa pamene makolo salephera kupereka chilango choyenerera?

¹⁸ Kwenikweni, chilango choyenera chili umboni wa chikondi cha makolo kwa mwana wawo. (Ahebri 12:6, 11) Ngati ndinu kholo, mumadziŵa kuti nkovuta kupereka chilango choyenerera ndi chanzeru nthaŵi zonse. Pofuna kusungitsa mtendere, kungakhale kosavuta kulola wachinyamata wosamvera kuchita zimene afuna. Komabe, m’kupita kwanthaŵi, kholo limene limatsatira njira imeneyi lidzatuta banja losalamulirika.—Miyambo 29:15; Agalatiya 6:9.

19, 20. Kodi ndi motani mmene makolo angachitire mwanzeru ndi nkhani ya zosangulutsa za ana awo achinyamata?

¹⁹ M’nthaŵi zakale ana nthaŵi zonse anafunikira kuthandiza ntchito zapanyumba kapena m’munda. Lerolino achinyamata ambiri amakhala ndi nthaŵi yochuluka yomasuka. Kuti liwapatse zochita m’nthaŵiyo, dziko la malonda limapereka zinthu zochuluka zakuti achite m’nthaŵi yomasuka. Ndipo pokhala kuti dziko silimachirikiza kwambiri miyezo ya Baibulo ya makhalidwe, ngozi ilipo yaikulu.

²⁰ Chifukwa chake, makolo osamala amasungabe ulamuliro wawo wopanga zosankha ponena za zosangulutsa. Komabe, musaiŵale kuti wachinyamatayo akukula. Chaka chilichonse, mwachionekere adzafuna kuchitiridwa monga wachikulire. Chotero, nkwanzeru kwa kholo kupereka ufulu wowonjezereka wa kudzisankhira zosangulutsa pamene wachinyamata akukula—malinga ngati zosankhazo zikusonyeza kukula msinkhu mwauzimu. Nthaŵi zina, wachinyamata angasankhe nyimbo zosayenera, mabwenzi, ndi zina zotero. Zikachitika zimenezi, muyenera kukambitsirana ndi wachinyamatayo kuti mtsogolo akapange zosankha zabwino.

21. Kodi kusakhala oumitsa zinthu ponena za nthaŵi ya kusanguluka kungatetezere motani wachinyamata?

²¹ Kodi zosangulutsa ziyenera kupatsidwa nthaŵi yaikulu motani? M’maiko ena achinyamata amachititsidwa kukhulupirira kuti angaseŵere mulimonse mmene angafunire. Chotero, wachichepere womasinkhuka angalinganize zochita zake mwanjira yakuti ‘azingosanguluka’ nthaŵi zonse. Makolo ndiwo ayenera kuphunzitsa kuti nthaŵi iyenera kutayiridwanso pa zinthu zina, monga banja, phunziro laumwini, mayanjano ndi anthu okhwima mwauzimu, misonkhano yachikristu, ndi ntchito zapanyumba. Izi zidzaletsa “zokondweretsa za moyo” kutsamwitsa Mawu a Mulungu.—Luka 8:11-15.

22. Kodi kusanguluka kuyenera kulinganizidwa ndi chiyani m’moyo wa wachinyamata?

²² Mfumu Solomo anati: “Ndidziŵa kuti iwo alibe ubwino, koma kukondwa ndi kuchita zabwino pokhala ndi moyo. Ndiponso kuti munthu yense adye namwe naone zabwino m’ntchito zake zonse; ndiwo mtulo wa Mulungu.” (Mlaliki 3:12, 13) Inde, kukondwera kuli mbali ya moyo woyenera. Chimodzimodzi ndi kugwira ntchito zolimba. Achinyamata ambiri lerolino samadziŵa za chikhutiro chimene chimadza ndi kugwira ntchito zolimba kapena ulemu waumwini umene umadza ndi kulimbana ndi vuto ndi kuligonjetsa. Ena samakhala ndi mwaŵi wakuphunzira maluso kapena ntchito imene angachirikizire moyo wawo akakula. Apa mpamene pali ntchito yaikulu kwa kholo. Kodi mudzatsimikizira kuti mwana wanu wapeza mwaŵi umenewu? Ngati mungakhoze kuphunzitsa wachinyamata wanu kuona phindu la kugwira ntchito zolimba ndi kusangalala nayo, iye adzakhala ndi kaonedwe ka zinthu kabwino kamene kadzadzetsa mapindu m’moyo wake wonse.

23. Kodi makolo angalimbikitse motani achinyamata awo?

²³ Ngakhale pamene muli ndi mavuto ndi wachinyamata wanu, zimene malemba amanena zimagwirabe ntchito: “Chikondi sichitha nthaŵi zonse.” (1 Akorinto 13:8) Musaleke kusonyeza chikondi chimene mosakayikira muli nacho. Dzifunseni kuti, ‘Kodi ndimathokoza mwana aliyense pachipambano chake cha kuthetsa mavuto kapena kugonjetsa zopinga? Kodi ndimagwiritsira ntchito mipata yosonyezera chikondi changa ndi chiyamikiro kwa ana anga, mipatayo isanapite?’ Ngakhale kuti nthaŵi zina pangakhale kumvana molakwa, ngati achinyamata aona kuti mumawakondadi, mwachionekere iwonso adzakukondani.

24. Kodi ndi pulinsipulo la Malemba lotani limene lili loona limene limagwira ntchito nthaŵi zambiri pankhani ya kulera ana, koma kodi tiyenera kukumbukiranji?

²⁴ Ndithudi, pamene ana akusinkhukira ku uchikulire, potsirizira pake adzayamba kupanga okha zosankha zazikulu kwambiri. Nthaŵi zina makolo sangakondwere nazo zosankhazo. Bwanji ngati mwana wawo asankha kuleka kutumikira Yehova Mulungu? Zimenezi zingachitikedi. Ngakhale ena a ana auzimu a Yehova anakana uphungu wake ndi kupanduka. (Genesis 6:2; Yuda 6) Ana sali makompyuta, amene angalinganizidwe kungochita zimene tikufuna. Iwo ali zolengedwa zokhala ndi ufulu wakudzisankhira, okhala ndi thayo kwa Yehova pazosankha zimene apanga. Chikhalirechobe, Miyambo 22:6 imagwirabe ntchito nthaŵi zambiri: “Phunzitsa mwana poyamba njira yake; ndipo angakhale atakalamba sadzachokamo.”

25. Kodi njira yabwino koposa ndi yotani imene makolo angasonyezere chiyamikiro kwa Yehova pa mwaŵi wawo wakukhala makolo?

²⁵ Motero, sonyezani ana anu chikondi chachikulu. Chitani zonse zomwe mungakhoze kuti mutsatire mapulinsipulo a Baibulo powalera iwo. Perekani chitsanzo chabwino cha makhalidwe aumulungu. Mukatero mudzapatsa ana anu mwaŵi wabwino koposa wakukula ndi kukhala achikulire anzeru, ndi owopa Mulungu. Iyi ndiyo njira yabwino koposa imene makolo angasonyezere chiyamikiro kwa Yehova pa mwaŵi wawo wa kukhala makolo.