Ndinapeza Chilungamo​—Osati mu Ndale Zadziko Koma mu Chikristu Chowona

Monga mmene yasimbidwira ndi Xavier Noll

KUPANDA CHILUNGAMO! Ichi chinali chinachake chimene ndinakumana nacho kumayambiriro m’moyo, ndipo ndinavutika chifukwa cha icho. Monga wachichepere, ndinadzifunsa inemwini: ‘Kodi kupanda chilungamo kuli chinachake chimene chiyenera kokha kupiriridwa? Kodi palibe boma pa dziko lapansi limene liri lokhoza kutha iko? Ndi kuti kumene chilungamo chingapezedwe?’ Potsirizira pake ndinachipeza icho, koma kwinakwake kumene sindinayembekezere.

Kufufuza Kuyambira ku Ubwana

Ndinaleredwa mu Wittelsheim, mzinda waung’ono mu Alsace, chigawo cha kumpoto cha kum’mawa kwa France. Atate anga, mofanana ndi amuna ena m’gawo limenelo, anagwira ntchito pa mgodi wa potash. Kubwerera mu ma-1930, ogwira ntchito m’dziko la maindastri anali odzazidwa ndi kuwukira. Ndimakumbukira kuti monga mwana, ndinagwirizana m’zisonyezero za ogwira ntchitowo. Tinali kuyenda m’makwalala ndi zibakera zokwezedwa, tikumaimba nyimbo za kusintha kwa boma, monga ngati soshalisiti “Internationale.” Ogwira ntchitowo analamulira kaamba ka chilungamo ndi mikhalidwe yabwinopo ya moyo.

Pamene ogwira ntchito pa mgodiwo analeka kugwira ntchito ndi kukhala ku mgodiwo, ine ndinkatenga zakudya kwa atate anga. Ndimakumbukirabe kuti ndinali wowopa pamene ndinayenera kupyola gulu la otetezera okhala ndi zida a mtunduwo ndi cholinga chokapereka gamell (chitini cha chakudya) cha atate anga kwa iwo kupyolera m’mizere ya migodi. Ndinasangalatsidwa ndi zipepala zopachikidwa zosonyeza mawu ofala a moto ndi mbendera zofiira zikuwuluka m’mphepo, zina ziri ndi nyundo ndi chikwakwa.

Akazi anali kusonkhana kutsogolo kwa zipata za mgodi, akumafuula mawu ofalawo kulimbikitsa amuna awo kupitirizabe kumenyera motsutsana ndi “odyererawo.” Akazi ena anakhala m’mantha a nthaŵi zonse kaamba ka chisungiko cha amuna awo. Mosasamala kanthu za malingaliro awo otsutsa chikapitalisiti, amuna ena ankazemba kupita ku migodiyo pansi pa mdima ndi cholinga chofuna kupeza ndalama zokwanira kudyetsa mabanja awo. Panthaŵi zina atate anga anachitanso ichi. Iwo ankanyamula mfuti m’thumba lawo ndi cholinga chakuti mwinamwake angakumane ndi owukira lamulo ofunafuna kaamba ka ophwanya kuleka kugwira ntchito.

Hitler Alowerera mu France

Ndinali ndi zaka 17 pamene nkhondo inawulika. Miyezi yochepera pambuyo pake, a Nazi analowerera mu France. Popeza iwo anadzinenera kuti Alsace siinali kokha gawo losungidwa koma mbali ya Ufumu wa German, amuna onse achichepere onga ine analembetsedwa m’magulu ankhondo a Hitler. Chotero, ndi sutikesi itamangidwa kumbuyo kwanga ndinathaŵa pa njinga yanga asanafike olowererawo. Nthaŵi zina ndinakhoza kupeza chondikoka mwakugwirira kumbuyo kwa magalimoto a akulu opita kum’mwera. Unyinji wa othaŵa nkhondo unali kale chonulirapo kaamba ka ndege za chiGerman, chotero ndinali kuloŵa m’dzenje pamene ndimva izo zikubwera.

Ndinafika kum’mwera cha pakati pa France, komwe kunali kusanatengedwe ndi maGerman. Koma ngakhale kumeneko ndinakumana ndi kupanda chilungamo. Ndinagwira ntchito mwamphamvu kusesa m’makwalala, kunyamula mabokosi a anthu akufa opita nawo ku manda, kapena kuponya m’mwamba katundu wolemera makilogramu 45 mu fakitale ya simenti. Nthaŵi zina tinkagwira ntchito kwa maora 12 pa tsiku kokha kaamba ka malipiro ochepera. Zambiri za zinthu zothandiza osowa zimene ife othaŵa nkhondo tinafunikira kulandira zinabedwa ndi nduna zoikidwa kugawira izo.

Kulinga ku mapeto a 1940, ndinagamulapo kugwirizana mu nkhondo kumenyana kuti ndimasule dziko langa. Ndinapita ku Algeria, mu North Africa, ndipo ndinagwirizana ndi gulu lankhondo la chiFrench lomwe linatsalira kumeneko. Moyo wa m’gulu la Nkhondo sunakhutiritse ludzu langa kaamba ka chilungamo mokulira kuposa mmene moyo wanga monga munthu wamba unachitira, komabe ndinafuna kutengamo mbali m’kumasula Europe. Anthu a ku America anafika mu North Africa chifupifupi kumapeto kwa 1942. Tsiku limodzi mu 1943, ngakhale kuli tero, ndinataya zitatu za zala zanga pamene chiŵiya chofufuzira zida chimene ndinali kuchisamalira chinaphulika. Chotero ndinali wosakhoza kugwirizana ndi magulu ankhondo omwe anayenera kulandanso Europe.

Kuipidwa Ndi Malonda, Ndale Zadziko, ndi Chipembedzo

Pamene ndinabwereranso ku moyo wa anthu wamba mu Algeria, kudyererana kwa munthu ndi munthu mnzake kofala komwe kunali kuchitika m’dziko la ntchito kunandipangitsa ine kudzimva wokwiya. Mmodzi wa anzanga anafa pambuyo pa kupuma mpweya wakupha pansi pa mikhalidwe yogwirira ntchito yowopsya. Mwamsanga pambuyo pake ndinali pafupi kufa pansi pa mikhalidwe yofananayo. Gulu la zamalonda limeneli linalibe kulingalira kuli konse kaamba ka umoyo, kapena ngakhale miyoyo, ya ogwira ntchito ake. Ndinayenera kumenyera kuti ndipeze malipiro obwezera. Ndinaipidwa kotheratu.

Ngakhale kuti ndinali kokha 24, ndinathera m’nyumba ya anthu achikulire, kumene ndinakhala kufikira kutha kwa nkhondo. Pamene ndinali kumeneko, ndinakumana ndi asilikari ena a chikomyunizimu a chiFrench omwe anakhala othaŵa kwawo mu Algeria kumayambiriro kwa nkhondo. Tinali kukhala bwino, ndipo analibe vuto la kundikakamiza ine kugwirizana nawo m’kumenyera motsutsana ndi kupanda chilungamo.

Pamene nkhondo inatha, ndinabwerera ku mudzi wa kwathu mu Alsace, wodzazidwa ndi malingaliro atsopano. Koma zinthu sizinachitike monga mmene ndinayembekezera. Ndinavutitsidwa kwambiri kupeza kuti ziwalo zina za Chipani cha Chikomyunizimu sizinakhale zomenyera dziko lawo zabwino mkati mwa nkhondo. Tsiku limodzi nduna ya chipaniyo inanena kwa ine kuti: “Ukudziŵa, Xavier, sitikanafika kwina kulikonse ngati tikanangolandira kokha omenya nkhondo olimbika.” Ndinalongosola kusavomereza kwanga ndi kukhumudwitsidwa kwanga.

Ndinadziŵanso kuti awo amene anali kufuula mopambanitsa ponena za malingaliro ndi chilungamo anathera zambiri za ndalama zawo za malipiro pa zakumwa pa kantini ya pa mgodi, kuchepetsa banja lawo ku umphaŵi. Mosasamala kanthu za ichi, ndinachitabe voti kaamba ka Chipani cha Chikomyunizimu chifukwa ndinadzimva kuti makomyunisiti anali kuchita zambiri kuti apeze chilungamo kaamba ka gulu logwira ntchito.

Ndinali woperekera pa Mass m’masiku anga a uchichepere, chotero wansembe wa Chikatolika anabwera ndi kuyesera kundikakamiza ine kukhala msilikari kaamba ka tchalitchi. Koma ndinali nditataya chikhulupiriro mwa atsogoleri a chipembedzo. Ndinali wokhutiritsidwa kuti iwo anali kumbali ya gulu lotsendereza. Pambali pa icho, ndinadziŵa kuti ansembe ambiri a Chikatolika anagwirizana ndi maGerman mu France mkati mwa kulandako. Ndinakumbukira kuti pamene ndinali m’gulu lankhondo aphunzitsi a chipembedzo a Chikatolika anaphunzitsa za kukonda dziko la munthuwe. Koma ndinadziŵanso kuti aphunzitsi a Chikatolika a m’gulu lankhondo la chiGerman anachita chinthu chofananacho. M’lingaliro langa, imeneyi inali ntchito ya andale zadziko ndi atsogoleri a nkhondo, osati atumiki a tchalitchi.

M’kuwonjezerako, zokumana nazo zoŵaŵa zinatenga kotheratu chikhulupiriro changa mwa Mulungu. Mlongo wanga anaphedwa ndi bomba tsiku limene anakwanitsa zaka 20. Panthaŵiyo, ndinanena kwa inemwini: Ngati Mulungu aliko, nchifukwa ninji iye walola kupanda chilungamo kuchitika? Mosasamala kanthu za chimenecho, pamene ndinasangalala ndi bata la mtendere m’dziko lathu lokongola, ndinadzimva kukhala wosonkhezeredwa mozama. Ndinali kunena kwa inemwini: ‘Zonsezi “sizikanangochitika zokha.”’ Panthaŵi zonga zimenezo ndinkapemphera.

Uthenga wa Chiyembekezo

Sande limodzi m’mawa mu 1947, mwamuna ndi mkazi a m’zaka zawo za mu ma-30 anabwera ku khomo lathu. Iwo analankhula kwa atate anga, omwe anauza iwo kuti: “Mungachite bwino kuwona mwana wanga wamwamuna. Iye amaŵerenga chirichonse chimene chiri m’manja mwake.” Chinali chowona. Ndinkaŵerenga chirichonse, kuyambira ku manyuzipepala a chikomyunizimu L’Humanité kufika ku pepala la tsiku ndi tsiku la Chikatolika La Croix. Alendo amenewo anandiuza ine ponena za dziko lopanda nkhondo la chilungamo kaamba ka onse, kumene dziko lathu lapansi likakhala paradaiso. Aliyense akakhala ndi nyumba yake yake, ndipo matenda ndi imfa zikakhala zinthu zakale. Iwo anatsimikizira chirichonse chimene ananena kuchokera m’Baibulo, ndipo ndinawona kuti iwo analidi okhutiritsidwa.

Ndinali 25, ndipo iyi inali nthaŵi yoyamba pamene ndinagwira Baibulo. Ndime zimene anaŵerenga zinadzutsa kufunitsitsa kwanga. Zinawoneka zabwino koposa kuti zikhale zowona, ndipo ndinafuna kukhala womvetsetsa pa nkhaniyo m’malingaliro mwanga. Alendo anga analonjeza kundibweretsera ine Baibulo ndi kusiya bukhu lotchedwa Deliverance, limodzi ndi kabukhu kokhala ndi mutu wakuti “Be Glad, Ye Nations.”

Mwamsanga pamene iwo anachoka, ndinayamba kuŵerenga kabukhuko. Umboni wa mwana wamkazi wa mlongo wa General de Gaulle wonena za umphumphu wa Mboni za Yehova m’misasa ya chibalo ya akazi mu Ravensbrück unalidi chotsegula maso chenicheni. ‘Ngati Akristu owona aliko,’ ndinanena kwa inemwini, ‘awa ayenera kukhala iwo.’ Ndinamaliza bukhu la Deliverance ndisanapite kukagona usiku umenewo. Pomalizira pake ndinapeza yankho ku limodzi la mafunso omwe anakhala akundivutitsa ine kwa nthaŵi yaitali: “Nchifukwa ninji Mulungu wa chilungamo amalola kupanda chilungamo.”

Nditenga Kaimidwe Kanga kaamba ka Chilungamo Chowona

Tsiku lotsatira, zowonadi ku lonjezo lawo, Mbonizo zinabwera ndi Baibulo. Chifukwa cha ngozi ya pa njinga, phewa langa linali m’pulasitala, ndipo sindinathe kupita ku ntchito, chotero ndinali ndi nthaŵi yokwanira. Ndinaŵerenga kupyola Baibulo lonse m’kokha masiku asanu ndi aŵiri, kumapeza malamulo ake abwino a chilungamo ndi ubwino. Pamene ndinapitirizabe kuŵerenga, ndinakhala wokhutiritsidwa mowonjezerekawonjezereka kuti bukhu iri linali lochokera kwa Mulungu. Ndinayamba kumvetsetsa kuti kumenyera kwa kukhazikitsa chilungamo chowona kuyenera kukhala kwauzimu, osati kwa ndale zadziko.​—Aefeso 6:12.

Ndinakhutiritsidwa kuti mabwenzi anga onse a ndale zadziko akasangalala kwambiri kumva ponena za uthenga wa chiyembekezo umene ndangowupeza. Chinali chokhumudwitsa chotani nanga pamene iwo sanasonyeze chirichonse koma kokha kutenthedwa maganizo! Ponena za ine, sindikanatha kuleka kulankhula kunena za mbiri yabwino kwa mmodzi ndi onse. Mwapadera ndinasangalala kugwira mawu a malemba ena, monga ngati Yakobo 5:1-4, kumene olemera akutsutsidwa kaamba ka kudyerera antchito.

Panthaŵiyo ndinali munthu wopereka makalata. Ndi cholinga chofuna kupewa kukwiitsa atate anga, omwe anaumirira ku maganizo awo eni, ndinkachoka panyumba nditavala chisote changa cha mwamuma wopereka makalata ndipo ndikukhala wotsimikizira kuchivalanso pamene ndibwerera kunyumba. Tsiku limodzi atate anga ananena kwa bwenzi: “Mwana wanga wa mwamuna akuchita ntchito yowonjezereka yochulukira kwa masiku apitawa.” Chowonadi chinali chakuti ndinasiya chisote changa pa malo abwenzi langa pamene ndinapita kunja m’ntchito yolalikira ndi kuchivalanso pambuyo pake.

Yochepera pa miyezi itatu pambuyo pa kukumana kwanga koyamba ndi Mboni za Yehova, ndinanyamuka ndekha kukapezeka pa msonkhano mu Basel, Switzerland. Mkati mwa nkhani ya ubatizo, ndinatchula kwa Mboni yachikazi yomwe inakhala pafupi ndi ine (amene mwachifundo anandisunga ine kaamba ka msonkhano) kuti ndingakonde kubatizidwa koma kuti ndinalibe malaya osambira. Iye mwamsanga anachoka pa mpando wake ndipo anabwera ndi zovala ndi taulo isanathe nkhaniyo.

Kufutukuka mu Utumiki

Ndinali kutha kale maora 60 pa mwezi kuchezera anthu m’nyumba zawo. Ngakhale kuli tero, pamene kalata yolimbikitsa utumiki wa upainiya (ntchito yolalikira ya nthaŵi zonse) inaŵerengedwa ku Nyumba ya Ufumu, ndinanena kwa inemwini: ‘Chimenecho chiri kaamba ka ine!’

Kulinga ku mapeto kwa 1949, ndinatumizidwa ku doko la nyanja lotchuka la Mediterranean la Marseilles kukachita upainiya. Moyo unali wosangalatsa mu Marseilles m’masiku amenewo pamapeto pa nkhondo. Unali mtundu wa mzinda kumene oyendetsa magalimoto anali kuima kotero kuti asasokoneze maseŵera a pétanque (bowls) akuseŵeredwa m’khwalala. Abale ena a chipainiya ndi ine sitinapeze kwina kulikonse kokhala koma nyumba yogonako yomwe inalinso kugwiritsiridwa ntchito ndi akazi adama. Sanali malo abwino kwa atumiki Achikristu, koma ndiyenera kunena kuti kwa utali womwe tinali okhudzidwa, filles de joie amenewo sananene kapena kuchita chirichonse cholakwika ndipo anamvetsera mosamalitsa ku uthenga wathu.

Tinali ndi ndalama zochepa ndipo tinayedzamira mokulira pa Yehova kupereka kaamba ka zosowa zathu zakuthupi. Madzulo, pamene tinabwerera kunyumba, tinali kugawana zokumana nazo zathu. Tsiku limodzi, ku kudabwitsidwa kwanga kokulira, mkazi wa chiYugoslav amene ndinakumana naye pamene ndinali kupita ku khomo ndi khomo anatenga chimtanda chachikulu kuchokera pa tebulo ya kumbali kwa kama yake ndi kuchipsyompsyona icho ndi chikondwerero kusonyeza kuti ndi mokulira chotani mmene iye amakondera Mulungu. Iye anavomereza phunziro la Baibulo, ndipo mwamsanga maso ake anatsegulidwa ku kupanda phindu kwa kulambira mafano.

Mu November 1952 Mlongo Sara Rodriguez, mpainiya wochokera ku Paris, anafika mu Marseilles kudzathandiza mu ntchito yolalikira. Tonsefe abale a chipainiya tinali osangalala kukhala naye akutsagana nafe pamene tichezera akazi omwe anasonyeza chikondwerero m’chowonadi cha Baibulo. Pomalizira “ndinamugwira ndi kumusunga” iye, kunena kwake nditero, popeza anakhala mkazi wanga.

Mu 1954, miyezi itatu pambuyo pa ukwati wathu, Sosaite inatiitana ife kupita ku Martinique, mu French West Indies. Tikakhala Mboni zoyambirira za ku maiko a kutsidya la nyanja kulalikira pa chisumbu chimenechi chiyambire kufutukuka kwa amishonale kumayambiriro kwa ma-1950. Pambuyo pa masiku 17 pa nyanja, pomalizira tinafika ndi mafunso ambiri m’malingaliro athu. Kodi tikalandiridwa motani? Nkuti kumene tikakhala? Ndi mtundu wanji wa chakudya umene tikadya? Kodi chikatitengera utali wotani kupeza Nyumba ya Ufumu yoyenerera kaamba ka misonkhano yathu?

Gawo Latsopano ndi Moyo Watsopano

Nzika za ku Martinique zinatsimikizira kukhala zochereza. Pamene tinapita ku khomo ndi khomo, anthuwo kaŵirikaŵiri anatipatsa ife zakudya zotsitsimulitsa. M’chenicheni, sichinali chachilendo kuitanidwa kaamba ka chakudya. Tinagawira mabukhu ambiri a Baibulo, ndipo ngakhale kuti ambiri a anthu a pa chisumbuwa sanali ndi maBaibulo awo, iwo analilemekeza ilo koposa.

Nyumba yathu yoyambirira inali ka msasa kokhala ndi denga la zitini. Mkati mwa nthaŵi ya mvula, kugwa kwa mvula kwa dzidzidzi usiku kunatidzutsa ife mwadzidzidzi pamene mvula inamenya zolimba pa dengalo. Madzi a kumpopi analipo kokha kaŵiri kapena katatu pa tsiku. Tinalibe chipinda chosambiramo. Tinali kusamba mwakuimirira pa chitini cha mafuta chopanda kanthu kumbuyo kwa nyumba yathu, tikumasinthana kuthira madzi pa wina ndi mnzake. Chowoneka cha umbuli koma cholandirika pambuyo pa tsiku lalitali m’dzuŵa!

Sara anayenera kusinthira ku kaphikidwe ka kumaloko ndi kuphunzira kupanga mkate wa zipatso. Monga mwana, nthaŵi zonse ndinalingalira mtengo wa mkate wa zipatso wokhala ndi malofu olenjekeka kuchokera ku nthambi zake. M’chenicheni, chipatso cha mtengo umenewo chiri chokhala ngati ndiwo za masamba. Icho chingakonzedwe monga mbatata. Kubwerera m’masiku amenewo, tinali kudya icho ndi mazira a nkhunda. Ichi chinali chokoma koposa, koma lerolino mazira amenewo ali chinthu chowonjezerako. Mkate wa chipatso ulinso wabwino ndi nyama kapena nsomba.

Mavuto a zakuthupi analakidwa, ndipo madalitso ambiri auzimu anakwaniritsa kaamba ka mavuto ena aliwonse. Pamene ndinafika kunyumba tsiku lina, ndinalengeza kwa Sara kuti ndapeza Nyumba ya Ufumu ya mipando zana limodzi. “Kwa ndalama zingati?” iye anafunsa tero. “Mwiniwakeyo anandiuza ine kuika mtengo wanga,” ndinayankha tero. Panthaŵi imeneyo zonse zomwe tikanapereka inali ndalama yochepa kwambiri 10 francs pa mwezi. Mwachitsogozo chaumulungu, mwamunayo anavomereza.

Tinali m’ziyembekezo zapamwamba za kukhala ndi chiŵerengero cha opezekapo pa msonkhano chabwino koposa, popeza anthu nthaŵi zonse ankanena kuti: “Ngati munali ndi holo, tikanabwera ku misonkhano yanu.” Ngakhale kuli tero, kwa miyezi yambiri tinali ndi avereji ya opezekapo khumi okha. Koma kupirira kunabala chipatso, ndipo lerolino kuli mipingo 24 pa Flowered Island, monga mmene Martinique imatchedwera, kupanga chiwonkhetso cha Mboni 2,000.

Madalitso Ochuluka

Kulinga ku mapeto a 1958, ndinapita ku French Guiana kukayankha chiitano kuchokera kwa wophunzira wachichepere. Pambuyo pa ulendo wa masiku khumi pa nyanja mu kabwato kakang’ono kotchedwa Nina, ndinayamba kulalikira pa Saint Laurent, doko la pa Mtsinje wa Maroni. Kumeneko ndinakumana ndi akaidi akale omwe anakhalabe pambuyo pa kutha kwa dongosolo la kulamuliridwa ndi France mu 1945. Kenaka ndinapita ku Cayenne, kumene ndinachezera mwamuna wachichepere yemwe ndinabwera kudzawona. Iye ndi anthu ena angapo omwe analembetsa kaamba ka magazini athu mkati mwa kukhala kwathu mu French Guiana anali tsopano atumiki okangalika a Yehova.

Mkazi wanga ndi ine tinaitanidwa nthaŵi zingapo kupita ku malikulu a dziko lonse a Mboni za Yehova, mu Brooklyn, kaamba ka kuphunzitsidwa kwa maphunziro kosiyanasiyana, kupanga chiwonkhetso choposa chaka. Kumeneko ndinawonadi mmene maprinsipulo a Baibulo a chilungamo ndi kufanana amagwiritsidwira ntchito pakati pa anthu a Mulungu. Awo amene ali ndi malo athayo amadya pa gome limodzimodzi monga achichepere omwe amagwira ntchito mu fakitale, ndipo amalandira unyinji wofanana wochepa wa ndalama zobwezerera. Inde, chilungamo ndi kufanana​—loto langa la ku ubwana​—liri chenicheni cha moyo kumeneko.

Tsopano ndiri 65, ndi zaka 40 mu utumiki wa nthaŵi zonse kumbuyo kwanga. Mkazi wanga ndi ine tinathera zambiri za zaka zimenezo kuyendera Martinique pa njinga za moto, kulalikira mbiri yabwino ya dongosolo latsopano la kachitidwe ka zinthu la Yehova lozikidwa pa chilungamo. Tsopano tikugwira ntchito pa ofesi ya nthambi yomangidwa moyang’anizana ndi doko losangalatsa la Fort-de-France. Zaka zonsezi m’gulu la Mulungu zatiphunzitsa ife phunziro lofunika koposa. Pali kokha pakati pa anthu a Mulungu pamene chilungamo chowona chingapezeke, popanda zotsekereza za utundu, ufuko, kapena kugawanika kwa chipembedzo. Limodzi ndi awo amene tawona akubwera m’chowonadi mkati mwa zaka, timasangalala ndi chiyembekezo cha kukhala ndi moyo posachedwapa m’dziko lapansi latsopano mu limene chilungamo chidzakhalitsa.​—2 Petro 3:13.