Mmene Mungakhalire Kholo Lachipambano

“NDIDZAKUUZANI chimene chimafunika kukhala kholo lachipambano,” akutero Raymond, atate wa ana asanu. “Mwazi, kuvutika, misozi, ndi thukuta!”

Mkazi wa Raymond akuvomereza ndi mtima wonse. Koma iye akuwonjezera kuti: “Sichiri chopepuka kulera ana lerolino, koma pamene muwawona iwo akukula kukhala achikulire athayo, kumenyerako kumakhala kophulapo kanthu.”

Kulera ana sikunakhalepo kwaufulu kuchokera ku zodera nkhaŵa. Komabe, lerolino, kwa makolo ambiri chikuwoneka kuti kulera ana kwakhala kovuta kwenikweni. “Ndikulingalira kuti kukhala kholo lerolino kuli kovuta kwenikweni kuposa m’nthaŵi ya makolo anga chifukwa chakuti moyo wakhala wocholowanacholowana kwenikweni,” anatero Elaine, yemwe ali ndi zaka 40 zakubadwa ndi amayi wa mwana wamwamuna wazaka za pakati pa 13 ndi 19. “Sumadziŵa nthaŵi zonse pamene ufunikira kukhala wosamalitsa ndipo pamene ufunikira kukhala wololera.”

Kodi Nchiyani Chimene Chiri Kholo Lachipambano?

Kholo lachipambano liri limodzi limene limalera mwana wake m’njira imene mwana ali ndi mwaŵi uliwonse wa kukula mu uchikulire wokhala ndi thayo, yemwe adzapitirizabe mwachangu kulambira Mulungu ndi kusonyeza chikondi kaamba ka munthu mnzake. (Mateyu 22:37-39) Mwachisoni, ngakhale kuli tero, si ana onse amene amatenga mbali yawo m’kukhala ndi thayo la uchikulire. Nchifukwa ninji? Kodi liri nthaŵi zonse vuto la makolo pamene ichi chachitika?

Lingalirani chitsanzo. Kampani yomanga nyumba ingakhale nazo zitsulo zabwino kwambiri ndi ziŵiya zomangira. Koma kodi nchiyani chimene chidzachitika ngati kampaniyo ikana kutsatira ziŵiyazo, mwinamwake ngakhale kulola njira zopusa zotsirizira mwamsanga kuti zitengedwe kapena kulola ziŵiya zosalimba kulowa m’malo mwa ziŵiya zabwino? Kodi nyumba yotsirizidwayo siidzakhala ndi vuto, ngakhale yangozi kuigwiritsira ntchito? Talingalirani, ngakhale ndi tero, kuti kampaniyo inali yodera nkhaŵa ndipo inachita ubwino wake kutsatira zitsulozo ndi kugwiritsira ntchito ziŵiya zabwino. Kodi mwini wake wa nyumba yotsirizidwa tsopanoyo sadzakhala ndi thayo la kuisungilira iyo m’njira yabwino? Kodi iye sadzakhalanso ndi thayo la kusasakaza ziŵiya zabwinozo ndi kudzilowetsa m’malo ndi ziŵiya zoipa?

M’njira yophiphiritsira, makolo ali ophatikizidwa m’ntchito yomanga. Iwo amafuna kumangirira mwa ana awo mathayo abwino. Baibulo limapereka ziŵiya zabwino kaamba ka ichi. Ziŵiya zabwino, “golidi, siliva, miyala ya mtengo wake,” zalinganizidwa m’Malemba ndi mikhalidwe yonga chikhulupiriro cholimba, nzeru yaumulungu, kuzindikira kwauzimu, chikhulupiriro, ndi kukonda kuyamikira kaamba ka Mulungu wamphamvuyonse ndi malamulo ake.​—1 Akorinto 3:10-13; yerekezani ndi Masalmo 19:7-11; Miyambo 2:1-6; 1 Petro 1:6, 7.

Mwana nayenso, pamene akula, amatenganso thayo lowonjezereka la kumanga mwa iyemwini umunthu wabwino. Iye afunikira kukhala wofunitsitsa kutsatira ziŵiya zofananazo, Mawu a Mulungu, ndi kugwiritsira ntchito ziŵiya zabwino zofananazo monga mmene anachitira makolo ake. Ngati mwana pa kukhala wachikulire wachichepere akana kuchita chimenechi kapena asakaza ntchito yomangidwa yabwino chotero, kenaka iye ali wopatsidwa mlandu kaamba ka tsoka lotulukapo.​—Deuteronomo 32:5.

Nchifukwa Ninji Chiri Chovuta?

Kukhala kholo lachipambano lerolino kuli kovuta kaamba ka chifupifupi zifukwa ziŵiri. M’malo oyamba, onse aŵiri makolo ndi ana ali opanda ungwiro ndipo amapanga kuphophonya. Kaŵirikaŵiri, uku kumaphatikizapo chimene Baibulo limatcha kuchimwa, ndipo chikhoterero cha kuchimwa chiri chobadwa nacho.​—Aroma 5:12.

Chifukwa chachiŵiri ndi ichi: Ana omakula amasonkhezeredwa ndi oposa chabe makolo awo. Mudzi uliwonse uli ndi zoyambukira pa mapindu a mwana ndi kawonedwe m’moyo. M’kawonedwe ka ichi, ulosi wa Paulo wonena za tsiku lathu uli wodetsa nkhaŵa kwa makolo. Iye ananena kuti: “Inu mufunikira kukumanizana ndi nsonga: mbadwo wotsirizira wa dzikoli udzakhala nthaŵi ya mavuto. Anthu sadzakonda chirichonse koma ndalama ndi iwo eni; osamva, odzitukumula, ndi ogwiritsira ntchito molakwa; opanda ulemu kaamba ka makolo, osayamika, opanda chifundo, opanda chikondi chachibadidwe; adzakhala osayamikira m’mitima yawo, achiwembu, aliuma, alendo kuzabwino zonse, opereka, olindirira, otukumuka mtima. Adzakhala anthu omwe adzaika zosangalatsa m’malo mwa Mulungu, anthu omwe adzasunga kawonekedwe kakunja ka chipembedzo, koma okana zenizeni zake. Khalani osamala za anthu oterewa.” (Kanyenye ngwathu.)​—2 Timoteo 3:1-5, The New English Bible.

Ndi nsalu ya chitaganya cha tsiku lamakono yosokedwa ndi ulusi wosalimba chotere, kodi chiri chodabwitsa kuti makolo ena amangolefulidwa ndi zochitikazo ndipo chifupifupi kuleka kulera ana? Yang’anani kumbuyo m’chaka cha 1914. Chaka choipa chimenecho chinawona kusintha kokulira m’chitaganya, ndipo sikunali kusintha kaamba ka zabwino. Nkhondo ziŵiri zadziko kuyambira pamenepo zachotsapo woposa mtendere chabe padziko lapansi. Chitaganya lerolino chiri chopanda magwero amakhalidwe abwino ofunika kuchita ntchito yake m’kukonzekera ana kaamba ka uchikulire wokhala ndi thayo. Monga nsonga, makolo okhala ndi mtima wabwino amakumanizana ndi mavuto amayanjano a malo otizungulira ku mapindu amene iwo akufuna kuphunzitsa ana awo.

Chotero, makolo ali ndi othandiza oŵerengeka pa gululo. M’nthaŵi ya kumbuyo, iwo anadalira pa masukulu aunyinji kuthandiza kuphunzitsa ana awo mapindu okulira ofananawo amene iwo monga makolo anawaphunzitsa m’nyumba zawo. Kulibe kumeneko mpang’ono pomwe ngakhale kuli tero.

“Zodidikiza pa achichepere lerolino ziri zosiyana,” watero Shirley, yemwe anatsiriza maphunziro ake pa sukulu la pamwamba mu 1960. “Sitinakhale ndi anamgoneka kapena kugonana kwaufulu pamene ndinali pa sukulu ya pamwamba. Kukoka utsi wa ndudu kunkalingaliridwa kukhala koipa zaka 30 zapitazo. Pamene mwana wanga wachikulire wa mkazi analowa sukulu ya pamwamba kuchokera mu 1977 mpaka 1981, kugwiritsira ntchito kwa anamgoneka kunali vuto lalikulu. Tsopano anamgoneka alowerera m’sukulu zazing’ono. Mwana wanga wamkazi wachichepere, yemwe ali ndi zaka zakubadwa 13, anakhoza kukumana ndi zodidikiza za anamgoneka zimenezo tsiku lirilonse pa sukulu kwa zaka ziŵiri zapitazo.”

Ndiponso, kumbuyo, makolo ankadalira pa agogo, achibale, ndi anansi kuthandiza kuyang’anira mkhalidwe wa “Johnny.” Koma kachiŵirinso, chimenecho chasintha. Ndipo chachisoni kuchisimba, m’chiŵerengero cha mabanja omakula, palibe ngakhale ziwalo ziŵiri za gulu lirilonse; katundu yense wa kulera mwana wagwera pa mapewa amakolo.

Ziŵiya Zachipambano kaamba ka Makolo

Ngakhale kuti kulera mwana kuli kovuta lerolino, makolo angakhale achipambano ngati adziyeneretsa iwo eni ndi chothandiza choyesedwa ndi nthaŵi​—Baibulo. Mawu a Mulungu angakhale chiŵiya chanu, kapena programu ya kachitidwe, kaamba ka kulera. Mongadi mmene womanga manyumba wanzeru amapanga kugwiritsira ntchito kwabwino kwa ziŵiya zake kuti zitsogoze chimango cha nyumbayo ku mathedwe ake achipambano, inu mungagwiritsire ntchito Baibulo monga chokutsogozani m’kulera ana anu kukhala achikulire athayo. Zowona, Baibulo silinalinganizidwe kwakukulu monga chochititsa kaamba ka makolo achipambano, koma liri ndi uphungu wotsogoza kwa makolo ndi ana. Lirinso chuma chodzala ndi malamulo amene ngati agwiritsiridwa ntchito angakupindulitseni inu monga kholo.​—Deuteronomo 6:4-9.

Mwachitsanzo, lingalirani, Diane. Pamene mwana wake wamwamuna wa zaka zakubadwa 14, Eric, anali wachichepere, anali “mwana wowiringula, wovuta kulankhula naye,” iye akutero. Panali pa nsonga imeneyo pamene iye anapeza nzeru kumbuyo kwa mwambo uwu wa m’Baibulo: “Uphungu [chifuno cha wina kapena cholinga] wa mu mtima mwa munthu ndiwo madzi akuya; koma munthu wozindikira adzatungapo.” (Miyambo 20:5) Kwa ana ena, maganizo awo ndi malingaliro​—zolinga zawo zenizeni​—zimakhala m’mitima yawo monga madzi a kunsi kwa chitsime. Eric anali wotero. Chimatenga ntchito yovuta kwa makolo kuchotsa zolinga zoterozo kunja. “Pamene ankabwera kunyumba kuchokera ku sukulu iye sankakhala ndi zinthu zokamba,” akukumbukira tero Diane. “Chotero ndinatenga nthaŵi kufufuza chimene iye anali kukumanizana nacho pa sukulu. Panthaŵi zina ndinakhoza kulankhula mwachindunji kwa maora angapo ndi Eric asanavumbule chimene iye ankalingalira kwenikweni mkati mwenimweni mwa mtima wake.”

Chifukwa cha mapindu okulira a Baibulo monga chitsogozo chiri chopepuka: Yehova Mulungu ali Mkonzi wake. Alinso Mlengi wathu. (Chivumbulutso 4:11) Iye amadziŵa chibadwa chathu ndipo ali wofunitsitsa ‘kutiphunzitsa ife kuti tipindule ife eni ndi kutipanga ife kuyenda m’njira imene tifunikira kuyendamo.’ Ichi chiri chowona kaya wina ali kholo kapena mwana. (Yesaya 48:17; Masalmo 103:14) Ngakhale kuti anthu ena afunikira kugwira ntchito kuposa ena kuti akhale makolo abwino, onse angakhale abwino pa kukhala makolo mwakutsatira zitsogozo zondandalitsidwa m’Malemba.

Chitani ndi Aliyense monga Munthu Payekha

Ana abwino sangatulutsidwe mwa kutsatira mbali zina zokhazikitsidwa ndi malamulo a umunthu kuposa mmene wachikulire aliyense amasonyezedwera kukhala kholo “langwiro.” Mwana aliyense ali ndi umunthu wake, ndipo mwana aliyense afunikira kuchita naye monga munthu. Baibulo limazindikira chimenechi. Kuthandiza makolo kupewa kulinganiza kosakhala kwabwino pa mwana wina ndi mnzake, lamulo la kutsatira uphungu wa Baibulo liri lolondola: “Koma yense ayesere ntchito yake ya iye yekha, ndipo pamenepo adzakhala nako kudzitamandira chifukwa cha iye yekha, si chifukwa cha wina.”​—Agalatiya 5:26; 6:4.

John, atate wa ana aŵiri, wapeza kuti uphungu wa m’Malemba umene uli pamwambapo wamthandiza iye kusunga kayang’anidwe ka ana ake ka wina ndi mnzake, kapena ngakhale ka mabanja ena, kukhala kokhazikika. “Ndimalimbikitsa ana anga kusayang’ana pa chimene mabanja ena ali nacho kapena akuchita,” John akulongosola tero. “Tiri ndi muyezo wathu wa banja womwe ufunikira kusungiliridwa.”

Phunzitsani “Kuchokera ku Ubwana”

Kodi ndi liti pamene chipembedzo chifunikira kukhala mbali ya ukholo wachipambano? “Inu simungayambe mwamsanga kwambiri,” akutero Gary, amene mwana wake wamwamuna wangoyamba kumene kupita ku sukulu ya nasale. Gary amakhulupirira kuti ana afunikira kukhala ndi mabwenzi enieni mu mpingo Wachikristu wa ku maloko ngakhale asanayambe kupezeka ku sukulu ya nasale. Chimenecho ndi chifukwa chimodzi chimene Gary ndi mkazi wake akhala akubweretsa Evan ku misonkhano Yachikristu chifupifupi kuyambira pa tsiku limene iye anabadwa. Gary akutsatira chimene Yunike, kholo limene limayamikiridwa m’Baibulo, anachita ndi mwana wake wamwamuna Timoteo. Timoteo anaphunzira ma-ABC a ziphunzitso za m’Malemba “kuchokera ku ubwana.”​—2 Timoteo 1:5; 3:15.

Amayi a Timoteo ndipo mwinamwake agogo ake, Loisi, anatsimikizira kuti sanali malingaliro awo omwe anamsangalatsa iye kuchokera ku ubwana; m’malomwake, iwo anadziŵa kuti zinali ziphunzitso za Yehova zomwe zikampangitsa iye kukhala wanzeru kaamba ka chipulumutso. Kalata yolembedwa kwa Timoteo ndi mtumwi Wachikristu Paulo inalongosola kuti: “Koma ukhalebe iwe mu izi zimene waziphunzira, nutsimikizika mtima nazo, podziŵa amene adakuphunzitsa; ndi kuti kuyambira ukhanda wako wadziŵa malemba opatulika, okhoza kukupatsa nzeru kufikira chipulumutso, mwa chikhulupiriro cha mwa Kristu Yesu.”​—2 Timoteo 3:14, 15.

Chotero Loisi ndi Yunike anathandiza Timoteo kulingalira pa Mau ndi kuika chikhulupiriro chake pa chimene Mawu olembedwa a Mulungu ananena. M’njira imeneyi chikhulupiriro chake sichinazikidwe kwakukulukulu mwa makolo ake koma mu nzeru yaumulungu ya Mawu a Yehova. Iye sanatsatire chowonadi cha Chikristu kokha chifukwa chakuti amayi ake ndi agogo ake anali alambiri a Yehova, koma iye anakhutiritsidwa iyemwini kuti chimene anaphunzitsidwa ndi iwo chinali m’chenicheni chowonadi.

Mosakaikira, Timoteo analingaliranso mtundu wa anthu umene amayi ake ndi agogo ake anali​—anthu auzimu mowonadi. Iwo sanakhoze kumunamiza iye kapena kupotoza chowonadi kaamba ka dyera; iwo sanakhozenso kukhala onyenga. Timoteo, ngakhale kuli tero, analibe kukaikira ponena za zinthu zimene anaphunzira. Ndipo palibe kukaikira kuti moyo wake wauchikulire monga Mkristu wachangu unatonthoza mtima wa amayi ake okhulupirika.

Inde, ukholo wachipambano uli ntchito yolimba, koma monga mayi wina wogwidwa mawu poyambirirapo ananenera: “Kumenyerako kuli kophulapo kanthu.” Ichi chiri chowona tero makamaka pamene makolo anganene ponena za ana awo chimene mtumwi Yohane analemba kwa ana ake auzimu kuti: “Ndiribe chimwemwe choposa ichi, chakuti ndimva za ana anga kuti ali kuyenda m’chowonadi.”​—3 Yohane 4.

[Bokosi patsamba 6]

Programu ya Kuphunzitsa Yotsatiridwa ndi Makolo mu Israyeli Wakale

Mu Israyeli wakale, makolo anali ndi thayo kaamba ka kuphunzitsa ndi kulera achichepere awo. Iwo anakhala alangizi ndi otsogoza a ana awo. Ukholo wamakono ungapindule mwa kulabadira programu yofananayo. Programu ya kuphunzitsa mu Israyeli ingangoikidwa mwachidule monga zotsatirapozi:

1. Kuwopa Yehova kunaphunzitsidwa.​—Masalmo 34:11.

2. Ulemu kaamba ka atate ndi amayi unalangizidwa.​—Eksodo 20:12.

3. Malangizo mu Lamulo, kuphatikizaponso mu zochitachita za Yehova, anaphunzitsidwa.​—Deuteronomo 6:7-21.

4. Ulemu kaamba ka anthu achikulire unagogomezeredwa.​—Levitiko 19:32.

5. Chimvero chinagogomezeredwa.​—Miyambo 23:22-25.

6. Kuphunzitsa kogwira ntchito kaamba ka kukhalapo ndi moyo kunaphunzitsidwa.​—Marko 6:3.

7. Kuphunzitsa kuŵerenga ndi kulemba kunaperekedwa.​—Yohane 7:15.

[Chithunzi patsamba 5]

Mawu a Mulungu ali chiŵiya, kapena programu ya kachitidwe kaamba ka kulera